cottom Posted May 1, 2014 Posted May 1, 2014 So im part of an engineering scheme in my business where i move around different 4 month placements to learn about the aspects of the business before i choose a specific one after 2 years. I just started a new placement and there is one woman in the office who is amazing, perfect every way. The only problem is i sit on one side of the office in the technical engineering team and she sits down in finance and commercial (different business aspects, no work reason to approach). We both have different kitchen areas so no way of bumping into her in their. On my first day i was sat opposite as only spare desk, we caught eye contact several times but i was to busy working to introduce myself. She works in a team of 4 or 5 guys and jeez they hit on her nom stop, was so cringey to watch. Yesterday i bumped into her in our kitchen for some reason and she asked how im getting on, i had a brief chat with her about how she got her job as we walked to our respective desks. I have no reason to approach her, she is hit on all the time by guys in the office, im only here for a 4 more months till i leave and go to my next placement 200 miles away and then off to australia! But she is literally everything i want in a girl so how could i approach her
stillafool Posted May 1, 2014 Posted May 1, 2014 If she's that great she probably already has a man. Sorry.
Kamila Posted May 1, 2014 Posted May 1, 2014 You don't know if she has a man. Only way to know for sure is to try asking around, look for a wedding ring, try to bump into her, office cafeteria ... ? Try looking her up on FB, Linkedin, Twitter, ...
d0nnivain Posted May 1, 2014 Posted May 1, 2014 Ask her for lunch or something next time you bump into her in the kitchen.
LustAppeal Posted May 2, 2014 Posted May 2, 2014 Ok I'll be blunt with you. You have two scenarios, Both with best and worst cases. Scenario one: You decide to approach her and tell her you find her attractive(How you do this is up to you and comes down to personal experience, we cannot make you confident and there's no such thing as a magic word). Next you ask her out. Best Case: She see's something in you and decides to give it a shot. (Seriously don't get caught up on the "she might not see something in me" whole thing... Consider it her loss, find something that pumps you up and start boosting your confidence a few days prior to asking her. Don't wait too long, if she's that awesome who knows when someone will win the race.) Worst Case: She doesn't like the first impressions and turns you down; big deal, she isn't going to beat you to the ground and humiliate you, if she does thank her for displaying that before you got into a relationship with her. Scenario Number 2: You decide not to tell her or ask her out and that it's safer to hide in your shell. Worst Case: She's in your head the rest of your time in country, and it doesn't fade when you travel to Australia, she's in your daydreams, you wonder "What if." Beating yourself up with all the things you could have said to her. If you're that passionate about meeting her I'll bet $100 you're already doing this to yourself. Best Case: A pinpoint meteorite chooses the very spot you stand on out of the roughly 10,398,453,120,00 Square Feet in the world and strikes you dead therefore preventing the worst case from happening. Just think about this ok, I always ask the people I instruct this: Question:Would you do anything for this girl? Usual Answer: Yes, she's the girl of my dreams... Reality: If you'd do anything for her, get your butt off the ground and ask her out, otherwise you're only fooling to yourself. Hope this helped man. Good luck. 1
mtber75 Posted May 2, 2014 Posted May 2, 2014 You have nothing to loose if you are there only temporary. Don't think to hard about it and just go for it! Ask her out to lunch together or coffee and if things go good, than move on to activities after work!
Gaeta Posted May 2, 2014 Posted May 2, 2014 If she's that great she probably already has a man. Sorry. *sigh* it's because of that kind of thinking that I am not approached in day to day life and I have to resort to online dating. I hate when people assume because you're a good package you must be taken.
Gaeta Posted May 2, 2014 Posted May 2, 2014 So im part of an engineering scheme in my business where i move around different 4 month placements to learn about the aspects of the business before i choose a specific one after 2 years. I just started a new placement and there is one woman in the office who is amazing, perfect every way. The only problem is i sit on one side of the office in the technical engineering team and she sits down in finance and commercial (different business aspects, no work reason to approach). We both have different kitchen areas so no way of bumping into her in their. On my first day i was sat opposite as only spare desk, we caught eye contact several times but i was to busy working to introduce myself. She works in a team of 4 or 5 guys and jeez they hit on her nom stop, was so cringey to watch. Yesterday i bumped into her in our kitchen for some reason and she asked how im getting on, i had a brief chat with her about how she got her job as we walked to our respective desks. I have no reason to approach her, she is hit on all the time by guys in the office, im only here for a 4 more months till i leave and go to my next placement 200 miles away and then off to australia! But she is literally everything i want in a girl so how could i approach her I don't see the purpose of approaching her. 1. Never date at work 2. You are leaving in 4 months so what do you have to offer her? 4 months of casual dating? Why would she go for that?
LustAppeal Posted May 3, 2014 Posted May 3, 2014 I don't see the purpose of approaching her. 1. Never date at work 2. You are leaving in 4 months so what do you have to offer her? 4 months of casual dating? Why would she go for that? Yes dating someone you work with can cause problems... But They don't do the same thing... It's like dating someone from a different firm who works on the first floor when you work on the fifth floor. And yes he's leaving soon, but the guy seems like he has approach anxiety, otherwise he'd approach her, so even if he's leaving approaching this girl could help him get over this anxiety. There's no such thing as a bad approach if you learn something valuable from it. You just went against your previous post in a way. It's not just thinking like that... It's making excuses not to approach a girl that causes the "nice guys" to fail and the overly confident douche bags to win.
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