Sostuck Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. Towards the beginning of our relationship, I found out he was looking at porn. I freaked. He told me he would stop and a couple weeks later I found out he was doing it again. He promised he would stop. See, I have a really low self esteem and knowing that he looked at girls that are obviously hot (because they can get him to, you know) made my low self esteem worse. So he wanted me to look at his iPod for a while and it turned out to be 3 months of that. Then just yesterday I found out he was doing it again. The catch is that I promised him I wouldn't look at his iPod after that 3 months and I have been looking for the past month. So we had a huge argument and like always, it got turned around on me. "If I hadn't looked at his iPod, I wouldn't have found out" is what he told me. But I told him a million times that he could tell me if he was doing it again. So I just want to tell him that I feel like he DOES think those girls look better than me cuz obviously they make him (you know) so obviously they are hot and he's always told me that no one is hotter than me... I'm so stuck please help...
slizl Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 You might be fighting a losing battle. Dudes look at porn, period.
saltyfishhead666 Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. Towards the beginning of our relationship, I found out he was looking at porn. I freaked. He told me he would stop and a couple weeks later I found out he was doing it again. He promised he would stop. See, I have a really low self esteem and knowing that he looked at girls that are obviously hot (because they can get him to, you know) made my low self esteem worse. So he wanted me to look at his iPod for a while and it turned out to be 3 months of that. Then just yesterday I found out he was doing it again. The catch is that I promised him I wouldn't look at his iPod after that 3 months and I have been looking for the past month. So we had a huge argument and like always, it got turned around on me. "If I hadn't looked at his iPod, I wouldn't have found out" is what he told me. But I told him a million times that he could tell me if he was doing it again. So I just want to tell him that I feel like he DOES think those girls look better than me cuz obviously they make him (you know) so obviously they are hot and he's always told me that no one is hotter than me... I'm so stuck please help... You will never ever ever ever ever!!!! Stop a man from Watching porn it will not happen. These women are acting, sure some Of them are beautiful girls, sure he will like it and get an erection. Most likely jack off too. However you are his girlfriend, you are the woman he chose. Low self esteem is incredibly unattractive (I'm sorry I'm really not trying to bring you down further) However maybe it's time you worked on loving you rather than picking on him. It's just TV - it's nothing to be threatened by
Mrin Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 You might be fighting a losing battle. Dudes look at porn, period. Quoted for truth Random Thought: have you ever looked at porn OP? For one it might give him a taste of his own medicine and second, if might take some of the gravity away from his porn viewing for you.
Author Sostuck Posted April 29, 2014 Author Posted April 29, 2014 You will never ever ever ever ever!!!! Stop a man from Watching porn it will not happen. These women are acting, sure some Of them are beautiful girls, sure he will like it and get an erection. Most likely jack off too. However you are his girlfriend, you are the woman he chose. Low self esteem is incredibly unattractive (I'm sorry I'm really not trying to bring you down further) However maybe it's time you worked on loving you rather than picking on him. It's just TV - it's nothing to be threatened by Okay, well why is he even with me then if there is always something better? I'm not going to potentially marry someone who doesn't think I'm good enough and feels the need to look at a screen instead of getting it in real life from me.
Author Sostuck Posted April 29, 2014 Author Posted April 29, 2014 Quoted for truth Random Thought: have you ever looked at porn OP? For one it might give him a taste of his own medicine and second, if might take some of the gravity away from his porn viewing for you. And the thing with getting revenge in that way, he says I should just do it. So he would be fine with it... But he did say as long as I'm not looking at guys with big dicks... So maybe I will do that.
Mrin Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 He isn't looking for something better through porn. That's like going to a topless joint to find a girlfriend. It is escapism pure and simple. Don't be threatened by it. I guarantee you a guy could be married to and wildly in love with the most beautiful sex kitten on the planet and he would still feel the urge to look at porn. It isn't a threat to you unless he isn't treating you right. Like if he doesn't want to have sex with you. Or if he starts to treat you (without you approval or consent) like a porn star. It can become an addiction for some, but if it is just the run of the mill porn watching, I wouldn't worry about it. 2
Mrin Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 And the thing with getting revenge in that way, he says I should just do it. So he would be fine with it... But he did say as long as I'm not looking at guys with big dicks... So maybe I will do that. oh you totally should. Ya, don't think of it as revenge though. It is just porn escapism. Watch some and it might make it less scary. Set the browser on incognito mode, and have yourself some "me time". Heck, who knows, you might get some creative ideas to try out on him later on.
slizl Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 Okay, well why is he even with me then if there is always something better? I'm not going to potentially marry someone who doesn't think I'm good enough and feels the need to look at a screen instead of getting it in real life from me. This screams insecure nutjob. No offense, but we would never last:D 1
hasaquestion Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 You sound very insecure OP. Does a guy need his woman to constantly tell him that he's hotter than Justin Timberlake? Justin Timberlake is ****ing hot. I'm not. That's just life. And you know what? If she's with me, clearly I'm doing something right. My gf asked me for the first time this past weekend if I watch porn for the first time. I told her I do (and that I'd watch a lot of it if she buys a video camera). Doesn't mean I'd drop my bags and ditch her for Nikki-Huge-Tits tomorrow. I'm attracted to her for other reasons. If your relationship working is contingent on the other party thinking you're the hottest thing in the Milky Way then you probably won't last anyway. I know I'll probably get railed for being a "porn addict" for this post, or worse, an "apologist" like those guys who didn't stand up to the Nazis before world war II. But if its that big of a deal than your relationship is in trouble imo 2
Gaeta Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 ....See, I have a really low self esteem and knowing that he looked at girls that are obviously hot (because they can get him to, you know) .... So I just want to tell him that I feel like he DOES think those girls look better than me cuz obviously they make him (you know) Do you know a man think about sex several times a day? Do you know men have a sexual thought about pretty much every women they come across in a day? and they don't need to be hot, the receptionist, a cute girl in the bus, the girl with a low cut top at the post office, yep, he probably imagined himself in a sexual position with each of them for a split of a second. ...how about when he gets aroused looking at tv shows, or commercials? should he stop looking at those too? About when you go at the beach, should you stop going to the beach with your guy, night clubs, walmart? Welcome to a man's mind. He doesn't look at them because he's looking at the next best thing or because he doesn't love you. He is looking because his brain is programmed this way, to seek to reproduce, to secure the survival of the human race. I suggest you get a good book on men and learn to understand them and their ways.
Mrin Posted April 30, 2014 Posted April 30, 2014 I suggest you get a good book on men and learn to understand them and their ways. ...I just love how the G curves in your screen na.... Ahem. Sorry. Nevermind. ;-) There is much truth to what Gaeta says.
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