Chattycathy Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 I have a male friend that I have known my entire life. Our families are close. We get along great and have fun together. We hung out in our 20s, tried dating but he decided against it because we were practically family and he was afraid of what would happen if it didn't work out. We both moved on and lost touch for a while. I married and divorced, he never married. We are now in our mid 40's and have reconnected. We still have a lot of fun together. He typically isn't my type but the comfort level is there and we have a good time. We went out recently and he kissed me. It caught me off guard, but I rolled with it. We spent the remainder of the night as if it were a date. Holding hands and kissing. We were both tipsy but for me, not enough to not know what I was doing. As much as I enjoyed it, it felt odd. He slept over, but no, we didn't sleep together. In the morning, I felt the awkwardness, but neither of us mentioned it. We were just back to friends. I texted him and said we don't have to discuss it, we can just move past it and we don't need to complicate our relationship. He said he agreed. How do we move past this? Should I give this a shot? Do I risk a life-long friendship? What got into him, kissing me after all these years? I'm so confused and conflicted. Feedback would be appreciated.
TigerLilly78 Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 What's so wrong with giving things a genuine shot? your not blood related and obviously there is chemistry you both have been trying to deny..so you have a talk and decide like adults that if it doesn't work then that's it you split as friends like you did before I don't see why not in my opinion..
preraph Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 If you already have him in the sort of brother zone, then sleeping together is going to feel incestual. I've been there, because everyone said friends first, you know, and wanted to at least try, but it did ruin our friendship. Men seem better able to handle having sex with friends than women. But listen, this is a golden opportunity for you both. Talk to him about that you should both keep hanging out and bring other people along when it's possible and maybe you can sort of set each other up with each other's friends or coworkers.
Standard-Fare Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 You sound not terribly enthusiastic about the kiss/sleepover. It seems like something felt "off." If it had been something magical I'm sure your post would have a different tone. So if you're thinking it was just a semi-drunken blip, I think you've already handled yourself appropriately and it will make sense for you two to just resume your friendship. You've known each other for so long, and you've tried the dating thing already in the distant past... your relationship has the endurance to get through this.
Author Chattycathy Posted April 29, 2014 Author Posted April 29, 2014 Thanks. I think I am weirded out at the thought and going to take steps to ensure it doesn't happen again.
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