Long distance..girl is making me stay at a hotel when I visit

[TAV]

Turns out he wasn't.

 

Gosh, is this about you 2??

 

JK

[CherryT]

Would the situation be different if he payed for his flights? Just curious?

 

Also what if he suggested to meet somewhere halfway? Would it be expected of her to meet him?

 

No. If he paid for his flight, he should still get a hotel. Just because he paid to fly to see her, doesn't mean she owes him anything. Which is probably what she's trying to avoid. Yes, she could be interested but does she want to feel obligated? Probably not.

 

If he suggested meeting half way, then she should carry the cost of her share for her own transportation and accommodation.

 

My fiance flew to a different country to meet me. He paid for his hotel. He did it out of respect because 1) he didn't assume or put pressure on us to get along on our second meeting even though we knew we would hit it off. We never became distant and it was an automatic click of chemistry when we initial met for the first time and for the 2 months leading up to him visiting. 2) It was the gentleman thing to do.

 

In the last several years, we have both flown back and forth. I pay for my flights and if we meet in the middle or travel elsewhere together, I share the costs as well. We fly back and forth 2x a month, alternating him and I. It was never cheap for either of us (both had mortgages and demanding jobs) but worth it in the end.

 

It makes no difference if he paid for his flight or not. He should still get his own room. It's even a bigger no-brainer considering he didn't even pay for his own flight and is complaining about having to get accommodation. Either she's on to you and feels like you're only there for one reason (sex) or she's putting up boundaries to tell you, she wants to get to know you but not that fast. It's up to the OP to weigh out what he wants. If he just wants to spend the night, maybe not the investment he's wanting to make. But if there's something about her that he thinks there may be potential for a relationship... what's it worth to just find one night of accommodation?