Armegoggon Posted April 26, 2014 Posted April 26, 2014 Around 1.5 months ago, I had a terrible argument with a girl on Facebook. I know she's random but we talked a lot almost every day from December (before Christmas when she added me from a Facebook group) up until late February we started talking less often. Then came along a day that she deleted most of her internet friends list. She did that because of her boyfriend. Unfortunately there was a lot of dark things happening during that week so I felt very angry and yelled at her. That was when the argument occurred. I said mean things about her boyfriend and such. She said that even though she deleted me, she could still be willing to talk to me. However, I was very angry and I felt unprepared for her to delete me. So because we argued so hard and she had a bad day with her boyfriend, she blocked me. Now today, I was trying to modify my Facebook page and I came across my liked pages. I saw the girl, who looked very familiar. She was the girl that was my internet friend, who talked to me a lot over the course of this winter. I thought what if I could message her asking how things were going? Well because I remember she blocked me, I've decided to give an alternate message. Back then when we talked a lot, there wasn't a lot of fighting going on and out of all the fighting between me and her, it was caused because her boyfriend was treating her badly. I gave her some decent advice and cheered her up but she now blocked me. I highly doubt she remembered to unblock me but you know, it's been almost 2 months so I'm sure I think I deserve a second chance. Now before you think I'll be adding her after she unblocks, I will not add her. The reason I want to be unblocked is because I feel that being blocked is like being hated (don't change my opinion unless you got a very good reason). I feel I just miss talking to her. So what's a good formal message to send to her Facebook page? I am still capable of sending via Facebook Page but not sending on Faecbook real messages. I believe she does get notifications but whether or not, I'd still give it a shot. What should be a good message? Mainly I'll apologize to her and kindly request her to unblock me.
Tayla Posted April 27, 2014 Posted April 27, 2014 Hopefully i read your message correctly and your goals are two fold: (1) to apologize to relieve your status of being blocked (2) to not add her back on your list of friends. Point blank- you aren't ready to absorb the responsibility of a genuine apology. Its an act that accepts the full responsibility of harm done ,empathizes with the person, and learns from ones mistakes. You seem to simply want to be exonerated for your own gain. Think about it. Maybe then a simple note of i'm sorry what can i do to make it up to the person. And leave it at that. You don't get to decide that the person should unblock you. 3
Author Armegoggon Posted April 27, 2014 Author Posted April 27, 2014 Hopefully i read your message correctly and your goals are two fold: (1) to apologize to relieve your status of being blocked (2) to not add her back on your list of friends. Point blank- you aren't ready to absorb the responsibility of a genuine apology. Its an act that accepts the full responsibility of harm done ,empathizes with the person, and learns from ones mistakes. You seem to simply want to be exonerated for your own gain. Think about it. Maybe then a simple note of i'm sorry what can i do to make it up to the person. And leave it at that. You don't get to decide that the person should unblock you. Well you see, I want to persuade her to unblock me. I'm not saying I'll force her for that but I just feel I deserve a second chance. I might also tell her that if we argue again, you can block me. I may have argued with her and taken responsiblity but I just want to not get hated by her. See I know her point of blocking me is so that I wouldn't get to message her of the argument but I really start to miss her now. I just feel that you know, I want to talk to her at least and send her a message of regret so I understand what I did wrong to her. I'm sure everyone deserves a second chance right? Especially when this only ate an hour of her time (or maybe less) and she understood that I was in such a bad mood that day and her boyfriend was doing mean things to her. I remember talking to her in a fun way and all those times, her BF was great to her.
jellybean89 Posted April 27, 2014 Posted April 27, 2014 Its Facebook - who cares? You don't want to 'be her FB friend" but you want to be unblocked? That really doesn't make sense. Do you just not want to know in your head that someone has blocked you? Leave her alone. She's not stupid (I am assuming) if she wanted to be 'friends' with you again, she'd reach out. She hasn't 'forgotten' to unblock you ... she has made a choice to not unblock you.
Author Armegoggon Posted April 27, 2014 Author Posted April 27, 2014 Its Facebook - who cares? You don't want to 'be her FB friend" but you want to be unblocked? That really doesn't make sense. Do you just not want to know in your head that someone has blocked you? Leave her alone. She's not stupid (I am assuming) if she wanted to be 'friends' with you again, she'd reach out. She hasn't 'forgotten' to unblock you ... she has made a choice to not unblock you. I understand it's just Facebook but still, I just found her really interesting to talk to and be friends. She agreed at first but you know, when her BF was easily a jealous man, it became hard for me to talk to her. So then we had an argument and that was the cause of blocking me. Now if you think I want to add her back, well I'm not. I just want to be at least unblocked ok? Is that a problem to understand? Also, she actually is to be honest. I mean look at what I've previously said about her. She's easily driven by her BF. When we have a good chat, this is because her BF is treating her good. But anyways, that's history. She easily forgets things, unless it's about her boyfriend, or unless she is reminded every day or two. Now please don't try to post again, unless you're gonna tell me what's a good message to write to her.
Tayla Posted April 27, 2014 Posted April 27, 2014 re-read what i had posted, the message was there for you to utilize. People can post and respond in accordance to the forum guidelines. I do think you need more time to absorb your intentions. Does though sound like you are somewhat remorsefull, just can't grasp though how justifying is a sign of reconcilliation in amends.
Survivor12 Posted April 27, 2014 Posted April 27, 2014 You don't seem able to grasp the concept that you don't get to decide what other people choose to do or what choices they make. You have no more control about what advice you are given here than you do over someone's decision to block you on FB or whether someone chooses to like you or forgive you. What you can do is forgive yourself, learn from your mistakes and accept & respect the choices of others. If you are sorry, all you can do is apologize. What happens after that isn't up to you. 1
Author Armegoggon Posted April 28, 2014 Author Posted April 28, 2014 Ok, I just wrote a message to her Facebook page using my page. Hopefully this will work out fine.
Elias33 Posted April 28, 2014 Posted April 28, 2014 An apology is genuine when nothing is expected in return. An apology serves to relieve the other person not yourself. And that is where you should start. A second chance is decided not by the offender. I hope it all comes together for you. 1
Author Armegoggon Posted April 29, 2014 Author Posted April 29, 2014 I'm not surprised I didn't get a reply but I'm surprised she didn't take any further action towards my post. She didn't delete it or attempt to block me from Facebook Page. 11 hours sure does seem to be a lot because I remember that she went online every day. I also noticed that she posted for the first time in over 2 years something on that page! She posted it around 16 hours before I posted on her page. I guess we'll see how things go. Btw, I have a question regarding Facebook. Assuming she uses "default" page settings, will she be able to get a notification of another Facebook Page posting on her Facebook Page? Or does it have to be friends? I don't know why I am allowed to post on her page. I thought Facebook would automatically break the link wouldn't it?
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