Teraskas Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Update: Well after messaging for a bit, we've changed it to the local Indian restaurant which should be a lot nicer being a bit old school I offered to pay and she has warned me she does have a tomato allergy which i think is nice that she is comfortable enough to tell me. she did ask me about kissing again! so i told her best to wait and see what happens, hopefully she is just eager or something. I've never been to an Indian restaurant, so I can't exactly vouch for such a place. In any case, it's a good thing she disclosed her tomato allergy. Just don't go overboard by dumping excess tomatoes on her plate. ^^ Back on topic: Maintain the positive attitude and most importantly, enjoy the date. The very fact that she's mentioned kissing again is a good sign to me, and it could potentially lead to something more. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you, bro. If anything, this date shows more promise than all the ones I've had in the past 2 years combined lol. ^^ 1
Valen Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Update: Well after messaging for a bit, we've changed it to the local Indian restaurant which should be a lot nicer being a bit old school I offered to pay and she has warned me she does have a tomato allergy which i think is nice that she is comfortable enough to tell me. she did ask me about kissing again! so i told her best to wait and see what happens, hopefully she is just eager or something. Make sure to give her a kiss at the end of the date. 2
Author Targetlock Posted May 4, 2014 Author Posted May 4, 2014 Well I like to think this will make up for the 4 years of failed attempts I've just had. and yes I will kiss her when the time is right, don't want to rush these sort of things. I just need to try and be myself and not be too nervous, but this girl does make me nervous in a good way! 1
Teraskas Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 Well I like to think this will make up for the 4 years of failed attempts I've just had. and yes I will kiss her when the time is right, don't want to rush these sort of things. I just need to try and be myself and not be too nervous, but this girl does make me nervous in a good way! Well, it's understandable that after such a time you're nervous when faced with a (current) positive experience. I certainly would after having been single for nearly 2.5 years at this point. In related news for instance, on POF I got a message from some girl whom I messaged...yet only looking for friends. (Not ONLY relying on OLD, but I'm constantly running into this.) Kinda not bothering to respond at all at this point tbh. *Edit: Forgot to mention that the day before this I WAS in the process of meeting someone, but regardless flaked on me, heh.* Oh well, maybe one day. Seems at this point I'm just cursed lol. ^^ 1
Author Targetlock Posted May 4, 2014 Author Posted May 4, 2014 Well Teraskas i know the feeling, for a little while I felt cursed, I've had several situations before where they have disappeared on me or flaked out without barely a word or anything (one did flake out on me because they met someone else which was annoying) so I know exactly how it ends up knocking you back. hopefully this will actually end up being something, I don't think it has quite sunk in yet that I have a date tomorrow night!! 2
normal person Posted May 4, 2014 Posted May 4, 2014 (edited) we've ended up talking and she has asked me out! sadly in the profile i don't see much immediate attraction, but we do share a lot of similar interests Well I like to think this will make up for the 4 years of failed attempts I've just had. and yes I will kiss her when the time is right, don't want to rush these sort of things. I just need to try and be myself and not be too nervous, but this girl does make me nervous in a good way! You said in the first post that you don't see much immediate attraction. Now you'll kiss her when (not if the time is right or if you like her?). You can certainly be a little excited, but just try and keep realistic expectations. I've been out with ~15 OLD dates and I can say from experience that people are rarely as you expect them to be. You see some pictures, some descriptions, and you may start to idealize them in your mind before you meet. When you meet them, they aren't like that. Sometimes better, sometimes worse, but never quite as expected. I'm not saying she won't be perfect and it won't be a magical evening, I'm just saying maybe you shouldn't put the cart before horse just yet. Have fun and learn from it, whatever happens. Edited May 4, 2014 by normal person
Author Targetlock Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 yeah I know I'm probably just getting a bit carried away with the whole thing. and when it comes to kissing I meant only if the spark is there and the time is right, if not well at least I made the most of the opportunity I guess.
Author Targetlock Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 Well I had my date and it wasn't what I was expecting. first i was greeted by her carer to tell me she had Autism, which I was unaware of which made me feel a bit awkward me I decided to give it my best shot. Sadly I felt no spark or anything like that really, though she was nice company if a little awkward to talk to (messing with her phone a lot and worrying about her allergies) had a nice meal and chat but was honest to her about how I could only see her as a friend which she was okay with and we parted on good terms. slightly disappointed but glad I went through with it. Back to square one it seems.
Valen Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Well I had my date and it wasn't what I was expecting. first i was greeted by her carer to tell me she had Autism, which I was unaware of which made me feel a bit awkward me I decided to give it my best shot. Sadly I felt no spark or anything like that really, though she was nice company if a little awkward to talk to (messing with her phone a lot and worrying about her allergies) had a nice meal and chat but was honest to her about how I could only see her as a friend which she was okay with and we parted on good terms. slightly disappointed but glad I went through with it. Back to square one it seems. AWE I can't believe you broke her little heart. How could you!!!! Just kidding, yea sucks it didn't work out for the both of you. I bet it was hard for her to work up enough courage to meet you. That's how love goes. Unfortunately people who are born with physical/mental defects are left out. It's a cruel world. 2
Author Targetlock Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 I didn't seem to break her heart because she didn't seem that into me but tricky to tell i guess, but yeah I know what you mean. yeah as a person with a mild learning condition (Dyspraxia) I thought it would be hypocritical of me not to give her a chance because of her condition. it did finish on good terms and hope to remain friends though. still slightly disappointed and not what i was expecting. 1
IndianBabu Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 I didn't seem to break her heart because she didn't seem that into me but tricky to tell i guess, but yeah I know what you mean. yeah as a person with a mild learning condition (Dyspraxia) I thought it would be hypocritical of me not to give her a chance because of her condition. it did finish on good terms and hope to remain friends though. still slightly disappointed and not what i was expecting. Good on you man. Hope you find someone who is a better match for you, in the future. 1
Author Targetlock Posted May 5, 2014 Author Posted May 5, 2014 Oh i will its not a matter of if i will meet someone its just a question of when though it some days it just seems further away than i thought. 1
normal person Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 Well, the best thing you can do is learn from the situation. As I said earlier these things rarely, if ever, go as expected. So just keep that in mind moving forward. You sound like a great guy so I'm sure things will go well for you. 1
Teraskas Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 Oh i will its not a matter of if i will meet someone its just a question of when though it some days it just seems further away than i thought. Completely there with you dude. ^^ 1
Author Targetlock Posted May 6, 2014 Author Posted May 6, 2014 you never know what or who might be around the next corner. plus a friend might know someone for me recently became single and who is coming on a friends camping trip I'm going to next month, so you never know. 1
Teraskas Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 (edited) you never know what or who might be around the next corner. plus a friend might know someone for me recently became single and who is coming on a friends camping trip I'm going to next month, so you never know. Sounds promising, and indeed you never know. Similarly, I asked my friends to set me up with single women they might know who are genuinely looking for someone. Naturally, it seems they have forgotten, despite the several times I've reminded them. Ofcourse it isn't exactly easy to improve my social situation at the moment as all my buds are in relationships when they don't even bother to meet up anymore. /Sigh. Edited May 6, 2014 by Teraskas
Author Targetlock Posted May 6, 2014 Author Posted May 6, 2014 Yeah i know the feeling, I'm the only single one in my social and work circle which can make things awkward and reminds me what i'm missing out on. But i guess you got to make the most of the opportunities given to you or present themselves.
Frank2thepoint Posted May 7, 2014 Posted May 7, 2014 Well I had my date and it wasn't what I was expecting. first i was greeted by her carer to tell me she had Autism, which I was unaware of which made me feel a bit awkward me I decided to give it my best shot. Sadly I felt no spark or anything like that really, though she was nice company if a little awkward to talk to (messing with her phone a lot and worrying about her allergies) had a nice meal and chat but was honest to her about how I could only see her as a friend which she was okay with and we parted on good terms. slightly disappointed but glad I went through with it. Back to square one it seems. Wow, not what I would of expected as well. But now I understand why she was asking about kissing on the first date. But at least you guys had a friendly date, hope you guys stay as friends if she is a nice girl to chat with. Since she sticks to her phone, you can keep her as a text buddy. Good show old man. Oh i will its not a matter of if i will meet someone its just a question of when though it some days it just seems further away than i thought. you never know what or who might be around the next corner. plus a friend might know someone for me recently became single and who is coming on a friends camping trip I'm going to next month, so you never know. If you focus on the "when", then you will be anxious of it. Don't focus on time, just stay positive, and enjoy each opportunity that comes your way. This way you won't have an expectation, because you'll be comfortable and confident with yourself. 2
Author Targetlock Posted May 7, 2014 Author Posted May 7, 2014 yeah i know what you mean, but it just seems to get further and further away, won't stop me from trying though. 1
Author Targetlock Posted May 8, 2014 Author Posted May 8, 2014 Back to messaging women online, about 15 contacted, two responses of not interested, several ignored and a few I'm waiting on responses, well you never know i guess
lino Posted May 13, 2014 Posted May 13, 2014 Shame it didn't work out mate. Good luck and try finding women in the real world too. Online dating sounds like a nightmare. 1
Author Targetlock Posted May 13, 2014 Author Posted May 13, 2014 Well i'm hopefully changing to a new job soon, so that might open up some new opportunities
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