Standard-Fare Posted April 25, 2014 Posted April 25, 2014 (edited) A friend, "Clarissa," just had a (non life-threatening, somewhat minor) surgery a couple of days ago, but is still interested in attending a group get-together tonight. It's a group of very old friends who very rarely together, and we're cooking out/sleeping over at one person's place. Clarissa is on some minor pain meds and staying with some family members in town. Transportation to and from our destination is a problem for her, so I've already volunteered to take over one end -- returning her to her family's place in the morning. This would be about an 1.5-hour extra drive for me. But now it appears that she's also having trouble finding a ride TONIGHT. I'm hesitating to offer, because picking her up then going to our destination would involve about two hours of driving for me, not counting tomorrow's ride. Is this something I shouldn't be questioning -- should I just be volunteering to do this for an old friend who just had surgery? The logistics of this aren't as important as the question of, how far should I be expected to go as a friend? Edited April 25, 2014 by Standard-Fare
jellybean89 Posted April 25, 2014 Posted April 25, 2014 If she is a friend, you wouldn't hesitate to help her out so she can attend. It doesn't sound like you are that close with her. Surgery, no matter how minor, can turn into a life-threatening situation....infection, blood clots, complications. I'm not sure she should be attending since she isn't even a week post surgery. 4
preraph Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 I would weigh how close you really are to this person and whether she has 10 friends she's closer to than you (and family) or if she is really needing to depend on you because you're one of her only friends or best friends. Then if you are not comfortable with the amount of favors she's needing, at least you could contact other people for her and help her find someone else. People do need help post-surgery, but of course, they should have arranged that beforehand!
bubbaganoosh Posted April 29, 2014 Posted April 29, 2014 If she's a good friend then I would. That's what a friend does and if she could drive, I'm sure she wouldn't be asking. It would be a nice gesture on your part. 1
pygora1994 Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Personally There isn't much I wouldn't do for a friend. I have driven two hours on less than 30 minutes notice just to be there for a friend. I don't have many friends maybe 4 close ones. They would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. My friend came home from college during the week just to help me through depression, and I have cut classes to do the same for him. When a friend is in need I do what I can to help them. 1
ja123 Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 Personally There isn't much I wouldn't do for a friend. I have driven two hours on less than 30 minutes notice just to be there for a friend. I don't have many friends maybe 4 close ones. They would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. My friend came home from college during the week just to help me through depression, and I have cut classes to do the same for him. When a friend is in need I do what I can to help them. I wish I had friends like that, as I'm that way myself. Treasure your friends! OP, something is holding you back from just not saying "yes" without hesitation. I think you should listen to that voice. 2
ja123 Posted May 6, 2014 Posted May 6, 2014 There's more to the story, than we know. . OP, why wouldn't you say "yes" to this request, in this instance? . What was the most you ever did for a friend, in the past? . What was the most a friend ever did for you? . Do you ever ask your friends for help/favours?.
Recommended Posts