Will moving out of home make me more attractive to men?

[madgirl1991]

So i'm 22, have been working full time for 2 years and am on 54k. I live with my parents in suburbia (20 mins bus from the city). They don't let me have boys over for the night, want me home by 4am and if I date anyone, want to know his phone number and will usually text him asking where i am etc (soo embarassing). Do you think it will impact my ability to catch a good guy (working, educated, 23-26 age bracket) if I keep living at home?

 

I'm saving quite a lot staying here, despite paying some bills, and already have enough for a house deposit and am going to start further study soon. So I don't think I'm a loser or anything.

 

Lately, I've been having urges to acquire my own 'stuff,' decorate my own space, look after myself and have guys come and go as I please. I also dont have many friends, though I know lots of acquaintances I could perhaps become better friends with if I invited them over for game nights etc. Its too awkward with my parents here, and I want a trendy place I can show off. If i can do this, again, i think it will make me more appealing to the opposite sex. Opinions?

[TouchedByViolet]

Move out!

 

I moved out at 21, and regret not moving out at 18. Money is not nearly as important as freedom and maturing. Not only will moving out help you in the dating game but also you will make more friends.

 

Live YOUR life, not someone else's.

[Leigh 87]

Ironically. .. no guy cares that I live at home as my parents live overseas and the place is really nice.plus I have a car. And like u I'm not a loser. .... studying full time and am not a drop kick or anything. Literally I attract the same caliber of men that my independent mates.

 

I don't think you will attract any new man that you haven't already been able to frankly.

 

However it IS MUCH more ideal to live away from home. Your guys will aadmire the fact your independent. However, I believe you will still attract the same men and not more. The men that you attract will respect you a little more and likely feel more comfortable with you due to your independence.

 

Moving out will definitely improve your dating life but I don't believe you will attract men you otherwise wouldn't have.

 

The men I attract are drawn tto me because they feel I come across intelligent and classy enough.. they don't sense or guess that I must live at my parents...... men have told me that they didn't see a difference in my behaviour to that of an independent woman.

 

HOWEVER. .. Once they find out I live at home. ... it has never been a deal breaker but I could tell they would feel MORE comfortable if I lived in my own place.

[J21]

No, stay home and save your money. You'll appreciate all the money you saved later on. Guys 23-26 don't care about that kinda stuff anyways.

[Leigh 87]

No, stay home and save your money. You'll appreciate all the money you saved later on. Guys 23-26 don't care about that kinda stuff anyways.

 

 

 

 

This is true, but they would have even more admiration and respect for her if she moved out. That does not mean they would like her less and it doesn't mean she wont attract the same number of men she would living alone.

 

As I said, guys go for me based on the way I come across and dress. None of them can tell I am not independent since I am not less intelligent than my mates who live away from home. But those guys would think MORE of me if I moved out. They just would. They would feel more secure and comfortable with me as a partner. Doesn't mean they wont love me to pieces and admire me for the sort of person I as a whole though.

 

You attract guys, no offence, based on how desirable you look and come across in the initial conversations.

 

If you are intelligent sounding and they are very attracted to you and you seem nice, they likely wont care if you live at home IF you are a professional OR a full time student.

 

I know many young professionals living at home. Making 50K yet opting to save and live at home. These young professionals living at home? They all have other professional partners.

 

It WILL Improve her dating life. But she will not attract MORE men than she already does, as attraction is fluid and is based on how desirable you come across insofar as intelligence, personality and physical chemistry you ignite.....

 

Men WILL think more of you but you wont attract new men.

 

Your partners will be more confident, secure and in admiration of you if you live away from home!

[deathandtaxes]

No, stay home and save your money. You'll appreciate all the money you saved later on. Guys 23-26 don't care about that kinda stuff anyways.

 

 

 

I'd be wondering if the chick valued money over being independent.

But that's the view of a 35 year old guy, not some 23 year old.

 

 

You can always find a roommate situation, OP. That really makes things a lot more affordable and is a nice middle ground between living in your parents' house and having your own place.

[Eivuwan]

Move out. There is a limit to how much you can grow as an individual when you are living with your parents.

[Mrin]

What do you mean by 54k?

[Leigh 87]

Move out. There is a limit to how much you can grow as an individual when you are living with your parents.

 

 

 

Hmm well I personally grew a lot since I have travelled the world solo plus my parents have lived overseas since I was 10 so I am pretty independent in all areas besides financially, they give me a bed to sleep in.

 

I think growing as an individual can be achieved by solo travel and buying your own food and crap and only relying on parents minimally.

[deathandtaxes]

Hmm well I personally grew a lot since I have travelled the world solo plus my parents have lived overseas since I was 10 so I am pretty independent in all areas besides financially, they give me a bed to sleep in.

 

I think growing as an individual can be achieved by solo travel and buying your own food and crap and only relying on parents minimally.

 

 

 

That's all find and good and stuff, but OP's parents will text guys she goes out with. That's about all the motivation anybody should need to move the **** out.

[Leigh 87]

What do you mean by 54k?

 

 

 

 

My 23 yr old cousin works for a prestigious financial firm and he earns 70 ish K.

 

He lives at home to save money.

 

GO figure lolz. I am moving out the second I graduate and get a proper job.

[Leigh 87]

That's all find and good and stuff, but OP's parents will text guys she goes out with. That's about all the motivation anybody should need to move the **** out.

 

 

 

oh LOLZ.

 

wow. yeah.

 

When my parents visit I never brought guys home for sleepovers though. That is so inappropriate.

[Mrin]

My 23 yr old cousin works for a prestigious financial firm and he earns 70 ish K.

 

He lives at home to save money.

 

GO figure lolz. I am moving out the second I graduate and get a proper job.

 

Sweet Jesus. There is so much wrong with this. First the parents for allowing it. Second the man child for pulling that crap. "Saving his money" = wasting his parent's money.

 

To the OP - the answer is yes. Move out and become an adult and then maybe you can meet an adult man who will treat you like an adult woman

[Leigh 87]

Sweet Jesus. There is so much wrong with this. First the parents for allowing it. Second the man child for pulling that crap. "Saving his money" = wasting his parent's money.

 

To the OP - the answer is yes. Move out and become an adult and then maybe you can meet an adult man who will treat you like an adult woman

 

 

Men treat me like an adult. I live at home in late 20's. I had genuine setbacks though and am studying full time at college.

 

I had genuine setbacks in life though and I would rather move out, I am going to move out as soon as I get my first low income full time job.

 

My cousin is wrong for living at home on a higher than normal income for SURE. I will definitely move out even on a low income.

 

I have the intelligence and appearance of my mates who live on their own though, so it is a bit offensive to say women like me and the OP are "les worthy" based on living at home.

 

What about appearance, intelligence, personality and our demeanour? We are worth MORE than our living arrangement, it is one LESS thing we have going for us though I admit, but not a deal breaker to a man who is otherwise mad about us.

 

Men are going to go for us if we are more attractive, intelligent and a good fit for them OVER a girl who they are not much into YET lives alone.

 

A man is going to go for a hot girl who he is attracted to with a nice personality and who he is compatible with who DOESNT live at home, OVER a girl he is less into who DOES live away from home.

 

I advocate moving out asap, I sure am going to. But I DO NOT think a man would drop me if he met me, fall hard for my looks and personality and then found out I lived at home.

 

 

 

 

On 54 K like the OP is on, I would have me ass out of here, yesterday.

[Potion9]

No, it does not matter to a guy if you are still living at home or not.

Sounds like you are in a good situation. So keep doing what your doing.

[Girlwiththefairytatt]

While it shouldnt effect your abilility it does make life easier. When I was your age I was at home and my parents were just as strict. Once I moved out however I felt the difference. For me back then many of the guys I dated were in the sams boat and had been with girls in the same boat. Even today I date boys your age or in the age your looking for and they live at home. It doesnt matter to me. Also at the risk of sounding racist what is your ethnicity ? and what ethnicity do you date? Its just that Im Australian born but of Asian ancestry. Most males I date are also Australian born born Or came at a young age but are of Asian, middle Eastern or Medeterranian ancestry. Although it is stereotypical such cultures are more traditional and its common to live at home until marriage. As a result I dont know if thats a factor forvme and thats why I ask

[madgirl1991]

54k = 54000 before tax.

 

I'm malaysian descent. So its culturally what we do, stay home till married. But i don't know any malaysias my age where I live, and I feel more like everyone in this country because i was born here.

 

Guys think my parents are weird but usually oblige and are polite to my parents. Some don't respond when they text them, which I find rude and a red flag.

[Cpt]

I don't think anyone has actually answered your original question OP.

 

No it does not make you more attractive to the opposite sex if you move out.

 

If you want to move out, then do it FOR YOU and not for the opposite sex. You're obviously getting mixed answers from these posters, some say move out and be independent, some say stay and save money. I say do what is best for you and for your future, not based on emotions or desire to "have guys come and go as you please" but for what works best for your future plans and happiness.

 

Good luck.

 

P.s I love KL its a great city

[thecrucible]

Yeah I'm still an unemployed graduate and I live with my parents.

 

 

I must be very unappealing to men right now

 

 

I want my independence.

[iiiii]

I'm interested to hear these responses from guys, saying that whether a girl is living with her parents doesn't make a difference to them.

 

At that age (early to mid 20s), it would definitely have been a turn off to me if a guy was still living with his parents. To me that would suggest he was a mummy's boy - he's showing that he's willing to let other people take care of him financially (and probably domestically) rather than standing on his own two feet. The stay at home boys I knew at that age thought they were just as mature as the rest of us, but IMO having to pay your own bills, wash your own toilet, and wash your own clothes does make a person grow up! So definitely not a turn on.

[StanMusial]

I'm interested to hear these responses from guys, saying that whether a girl is living with her parents doesn't make a difference to them.

 

At that age (early to mid 20s), it would definitely have been a turn off to me if a guy was still living with his parents. To me that would suggest he was a mummy's boy - he's showing that he's willing to let other people take care of him financially (and probably domestically) rather than standing on his own two feet. The stay at home boys I knew at that age thought they were just as mature as the rest of us, but IMO having to pay your own bills, wash your own toilet, and wash your own clothes does make a person grow up! So definitely not a turn on.

 

Maybe it's different now, but when I was that age I preferred girls who had their own place. All of my friends did too.

 

I have one close friend who married a gal who lived at home until the age of 27. He constantly bitched about the situation. A few years ago I went out with a girl who was 26 and living at home. It's just kind of silly, going to pick her up and talking to her Dad like some sort of high school date. I'm a grown-ass man LOL. She was a cute girl but there are plenty of cute girls out there who are more independent.

 

So don't think it won't matter, to quality guys with options it just might.

[Keenly]

Your 22 being treated like you are 16.

If you parents texted me mid date id be pretty put off. You are a grown adult.

[Keenly]

54k = 54000 before tax.

 

I'm malaysian descent. So its culturally what we do, stay home till married. But i don't know any malaysias my age where I live, and I feel more like everyone in this country because i was born here.

 

Guys think my parents are weird but usually oblige and are polite to my parents. Some don't respond when they text them, which I find rude and a red flag.

 

Oh so its rude for them not to respond, but its not rude to have a date interrupted by nosy helicopter parents?

 

 

Do you understand what this shows a man? It shows us your parents will inject themselves into any situation or problem that comes up because they truly believe they have a right to stick their nose in it.

 

I don't mind a girl living at home, but not being mentally independent Is a huge turn off.

[kiss_andmakeup]

I met my fiancé while I was living with my parents, at a similar age to you (I was 23).

 

You are young and I think this is actually a very smart decision on your part. It's a good way to get your life started on the right foot with a healthy savings and no debt.

 

The only thing I would suggest is to maybe set up some kind of rent system with your parents solely so that they get off your back a bit. It sounds like they are still trying to "parent" you, when you are a full-grown adult. Maybe they feel like this is their right since you are living under their roof for free. What if you proposed to pay them a very modest rent...say, $100-$200 a month? I did this when I lived with my parents (although they never tried to parent me in the way that yours are), and it just helped me to feel like I wasn't simply taking advantage of them.

[d0nnivain]

I don't think men care where you live. They will care that you have a curfew like a child and they will (or should) run screaming if your parents' text them.

 

If you like your living situation stay there.

 

If you want your own place, move.

 

There is no right or wrong.