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When a guy talk about other girls, does that mean he's not serious about you?

Lovebite

By Lovebite
in Friends and Lovers

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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Hey all! I am new here. I wanted to get some thoughts on this. I'll call him "Tyler" I met Tyler recently....maybe last year around this time? Anywho, Tyler has shown me how much he really likes me, yet he'll mention other girls to me. Not all the time but he'll say things like 'Oh I am def seeing Monica later' or 'What do you think of this girl?' and he'll show me her picture. He even mentioned a girl I know...and he felt like they were going to lead to dating or something like that. I ask him everytime and he denies it to me, and says they never dated. I just don't get why he acts like he's in love with me, but will sometimes mention other girls, yet when I mention a guy he gets ridiculous about it. You can see the jealousy when I talk about another guy and he gets kinda snotty with me. I was talking to my one guy friend and Tyler literally got up and left cause I was joking around and talking to my other guy friend more, like ok? Does that mean the guy is not serious about you? What is the purpose of a guy doing this? It drives me away, like it's driving me away from Tyler, cause I think he is playing head games. I could go on and on, about how much interest he shows in me, yet he'll do these things though, and then it leaves me wondering.

 

Soo...is it to peak a girl's interest? Is it cause he's not serious about her? I'm wondering about this, cause I am not like that when I like someone I let it be known, I don't play games, also I wouldn't want to drive that person away and make them think i'm not interested. I want to go further with Tyler but him playing this game and leaving me confused about it, makes me reconsider. I am 22 and he is 25. I thought guys stopped doing this at 16, haha,. Please comment and open my eyes to this, thanks!

Candy_Pants Established Member

Candy_Pants

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Simple. He's not serious about you.

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mrs rubble Established Member

mrs rubble

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He sounds like one of my ex's, he just thought an awful lot of himself & used to love giving the impression he was some sort of stud. It progressed to "most girl" statements... "Most girls would give their left tit for a night with me" "most girls would beg to make me breakfast" etc. etc.

He's still waiting on these "most girls" to turn up since I left 19 yes ago!:p

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HappyLove Established Member

HappyLove

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Who cares why he does it. You expect more from a man who's interested in you period.

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Andy_K Established Member

Andy_K

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Could be he's trying to read your reaction. Could be he's trying to appear as though he has options.

 

Also, it's 'pique' someone's interest, not 'peak'. Just a pet hate of mine...

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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He sounds like one of my ex's, he just thought an awful lot of himself & used to love giving the impression he was some sort of stud. It progressed to "most girl" statements... "Most girls would give their left tit for a night with me" "most girls would beg to make me breakfast" etc. etc.

He's still waiting on these "most girls" to turn up since I left 19 yes ago!:p

 

Oh my god!!! This made me crack up! What a douche! Haha, man oh man sorry about that!

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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Could be he's trying to read your reaction. Could be he's trying to appear as though he has options.

 

Also, it's 'pique' someone's interest, not 'peak'. Just a pet hate of mine...

 

Yeah, thanks. Sorry I am not that smart, but thanks for the correction!

truth_seeker Established Member

truth_seeker

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When a man is interested in a woman, she is the only thing on his mind and other women, no matter how beautiful they are, do not get his attention.

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pteromom Established Member

pteromom

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It doesn't really matter WHY he's doing it. The question to ask is whether his actions line up with what you want in a partner. Are you ok with a boyfriend who talks about other girls and shows you their pictures and keeps you uncertain about how he feels? If yes, carry on. If no, move on.

 

There is a guy out there who will make you feel secure and special. Hold out for him.

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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Are you & Tyler BF & GF? If so, tell him you'd prefer he stop talking about other girls.

 

 

If you are not dating, he could be showing you he's not interested or he could be trying to get you jealous. Without knowing Tyler we can't say for sure.

tlegend Established Member

tlegend

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My observation, and assumption, and is that we are only hearing your side.

 

To me, it sounds like this guy is into you, and over time, has come to the conclusion that you don't like him like that. So, he tries to appear studly and a man of options because...let's face it, women find that attractive and will chase those men. However, he's failing because he has to declare he has options, where a real man just...has them. It's not in his behavior to strut his options, they are there because he's desirable.

 

Don't deny it. I know they do. There's a reason why players get play while the "nice" guys don't.

 

It sounds like he is trying to make you jealous in order to see if you feel about him the way he feels about you.

 

I personally think that's an incredibly immature way to judge someone's interest in you.

 

Do what you will with my observation. Good luck!

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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Are you & Tyler BF & GF? If so, tell him you'd prefer he stop talking about other girls.

 

 

If you are not dating, he could be showing you he's not interested or he could be trying to get you jealous. Without knowing Tyler we can't say for sure.

 

Right! I understand. No we are just platonic friends, we are not in a relationship. I think he's trying to make me jealous in a way, cause he shows alot of interest, but I dont know, it's still hard to tell. Thank you.

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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My observation, and assumption, and is that we are only hearing your side.

 

To me, it sounds like this guy is into you, and over time, has come to the conclusion that you don't like him like that. So, he tries to appear studly and a man of options because...let's face it, women find that attractive and will chase those men. However, he's failing because he has to declare he has options, where a real man just...has them. It's not in his behavior to strut his options, they are there because he's desirable.

 

Don't deny it. I know they do. There's a reason why players get play while the "nice" guys don't.

 

It sounds like he is trying to make you jealous in order to see if you feel about him the way he feels about you.

 

I personally think that's an incredibly immature way to judge someone's interest in you.

 

Do what you will with my observation. Good luck!

 

Thank you! It's a very interesting opinion, but what do you mean by he's falling? Thanks I see what you mean and it's interesting.

VeronicaRoss Established Member

VeronicaRoss

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I dated a guy that did the same kind of thing, here's a thread about how he was still doing the same thing 30 years later.

 

These people like to seduce and then provoke with jealousy to get a big reaction. It turns them on. He is hurting you to get you to react and say how much you're into him. If he was into you, he would be more concerned about how you feel. He may not be capable of truly caring how what he does affect you. Would you do that to someone you love?

 

Guys like this end up with women who are very competitive with other women and need the game too, desperate to finally win some daddy substitute or something. Is that you?

 

If not, walk away from this demeaning behavior pronto.

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Marks Established Member

Marks

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Right! I understand. No we are just platonic friends, we are not in a relationship. I think he's trying to make me jealous in a way, cause he shows alot of interest, but I dont know, it's still hard to tell. Thank you.

 

I don't understand...if you guys are in a platonic relationship, then why is him talking about other girls bothering you?

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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I dated a guy that did the same kind of thing, here's a thread about how he was still doing the same thing 30 years later.

 

These people like to seduce and then provoke with jealousy to get a big reaction. It turns them on. He is hurting you to get you to react and say how much you're into him. If he was into you, he would be more concerned about how you feel. He may not be capable of truly caring how what he does affect you. Would you do that to someone you love?

 

Guys like this end up with women who are very competitive with other women and need the game too, desperate to finally win some daddy substitute or something. Is that you?

 

If not, walk away from this demeaning behavior pronto.

 

Oh wow! I am so sorry! :( I appreciate the advice, a lot, thank you!

regine_phalange Established Member

regine_phalange

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It means that he will be friendzoned, forever. :laugh:

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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I don't understand...if you guys are in a platonic relationship, then why is him talking about other girls bothering you?

 

It bothers me cause I don't want to be platonic friends, but we are that way cause of his antics. This game he's playing is ridiculous and it's putting me off. I like him, so it bothers me. Thanks.

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Lovebite Established Member

Lovebite

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It means that he will be friendzoned, forever. :laugh:

 

He did I say I friendzoned him....hahahahaa!!!

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

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Right! I understand. No we are just platonic friends, we are not in a relationship. I think he's trying to make me jealous in a way, cause he shows alot of interest, but I dont know, it's still hard to tell. Thank you.

 

 

Then call him on it. Point blank say to him "do you throw all these other women in my face to make me jealous or 'cause you're hoping to get a rise out of me? There are more productive ways to get my attention you know."

 

If he's not interested he will sputter & apologize.

 

If he is, he will say something along the lines of "like what?"

 

My response, assuming you do like him, would be "you could kiss me."

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carhill Established Member

carhill

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Yes, if you're platonic friends with a man and he talks about other women, he's not 'serious' about you because you are platonic friends. Same with a woman, if the genders are reversed, presuming hetero. You, of course, have choices in how you process him talking about other women.

 

If this is one of those 'who's on first and nobody is talking about how they really feel' scenarios then disregard.

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