forevertrust Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 ok this is pretty long, so those of you easly bored, go fetch a cup of tea and a packet of biscuits, and get settled for the night. it starts just over 3 years ago. my friend, we get togetherand get engaged, alls good. sex, lifestlye, wants, needs, everything. 2 years and 10months (roughly) together, not much has changed. we both in really crummy jobs and not much money between us. recently ive started feeling sexual. really sexual. but not towards my other half. i cant explain how i feel. im now only 22, hes 25, and i was just gone 20 when we got together. just recently he's had more friends to go see, and ive found things to do. our sex life has slowly broken down, and no matter what we try, neither of us seem to be able to do anything to get it back up. sex is a HUGE part for both of us. i have started fantasisng about being with other men in bed, and its the only way i caneven come now. even if i start sex going, i cant feel i can come, just having my partner and him alone. just recently i have been going to the gym with my best mate, and this really gorgeous guy has been looking at me, and i admit ive been leading him on, checking him out when he knows im looking and so forth. even more recently, weve been talking, nothing inparticular, but unless my sense are completely misconcieving me, then he has been chatting me up, and i know for certain i have him. now heres my problem, ive always had selt-esteem issues, and its not often i get someone talking to me cause they want to. ive been thinking. i love my partner so much that words could never express this. but with me fantasising about sleeping with other men, even though i love him, would it affect us. the only way i can see to make us better is to sleep with someone else, preferably someone i dont know, and then all would be well again because i would feel young and sexually wanted again. i think this is the problem, before us, we had both only had one proper sexual relationship. and i think this it where it stems from. but i dont know what to do. this guy is really checking me out and finding any excuse to talk to me, and i know my fiancee would never find out. so guys, whatdo you think i should do? i really feel i could solve our relationship issues if i did.
Weird Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 you need to seek out some counceling if you think cheating on your guy would make the relationship better. Also, try and look past sex as such a key component of the relationship. EVery animal can hump...not every animal can do the other stuff we as humans can. Try focusing on those things.
Numb Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 Dam thats just wrong, I mean what are you thinking? Having sex with someone else is going to destroy your relationship and he will find out sooner or later, who knows the guy in the gym could be a freak and tell him you never know. Like weird said seek help, don't screw up your boyfreind.
jellybean Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 *big sigh*...it just never ceases to amaze me..... How can anyone say they are in love with their fiancee, yet make the conscious decision to lie and cheat?!!? Your betrayal is going to be the most hateful thing you could ever do to him...but heck - you don't care, you're only focused on your own selfish desires. i really feel i could solve our relationship issues if i did. No, wrong - your relationship issues will be intensified.
alphamale Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 dear FOREVERTRUST. do whatever you want and what will make u happy. You are only 22 yrs old, this is the time to experiment and be carefree. it is way too young to be married and all that.
Numb Posted February 4, 2005 Posted February 4, 2005 Kinda sounds like my ex but wait she did that but for 8 months. What is wrong with women out there, do you have any idea what this is going to do to him???? Now thats love right there.<rolling eyes> Atleast break up with him, then go DO whatever you want.
bhockeyct11 Posted February 5, 2005 Posted February 5, 2005 Wow. You obviously don't like the guy as much as you say you do. If you are willing and even considering lieing and cheating on him, you might as well dump him now. Cheating is not the answer. If you are already having these feelings before your married, do not get married. Tell him how you feel now.
lynnered Posted February 5, 2005 Posted February 5, 2005 i agree w/h numb if you want him ,break up first, or even take a break tell him you want to see other people . if its just sex (if you want it to work w/h boyfriend)spice it up new positions ,some porn, get some sexy outfits ,but whatever you do be honest your young &you should do what makes you happy but you don't need to lie &cheat to achieve that .
sweet-oooh Posted February 6, 2005 Posted February 6, 2005 How the hell would you feel if HE did this to you???
Grinning Maniac Posted February 7, 2005 Posted February 7, 2005 What are you doing, lady? You are the most nieve person ever if you actually believe sleeping with someone else will IMPROVE your relationship with your boyfriend. How does that make ANY sense to you? Do you have any idea how stupid that sounds? IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY. Trust us on this. Think about it logically. How will having sex with the guy from the gym make sex with your boyfriend BETTER? It won't, and that's the issue here. If you want to improve things with HIM then guess who you're going to have to deal with? HIM! Not some guy from a gym, not someone from work, not a male escort...your boyfriend. If you honestly think things are irreparable with your boyfriend, just break up, wait awhile and then bang whoever you want whenever you want. But don't do this person whom you claim to love the disrespect of cheating on him because you feel he's lacking in the sack. That has to be the biggest slap in the face imaginable. Furthermore, let's be real honest about something....as far as I can tell, nearly every woman who sets out to have to fun little "no-string sex" affair gets screwed in the end. Why? Because women tend to catch feelings very easily when it comes to sex. What makes you so different? Check out older threads on here, research it, it's pretty much a fact. Even off LS, I've watched chicks get into an affair convinced it would be so very casual, and then a few months down the line they start whining: "OMG I LOOOVVVE HIM!!! HE'S MY SOULMATE!" Silly twats. Sleeping around is not going to make things better with your boyfriend...it'll likely just make things better with the guy you're banging...and if you love your boyfriend, that'll make your situation a WHOLE lot worse. Use your head, will ya?
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