miffymars Posted April 20, 2014 Posted April 20, 2014 I've been with him for 3 years it's been on and off. He broke up with me through text saying his job was too much after a month he came back begging and pleading and then I took him back only to have my friend find him on Plenty of Fish. Then I find pictures of him with a girl on his Itouch taken days after he broke up with me the first time. I confronted him on both occasions and have been met with bogus stories saying his brother made the account because he didn't know that we were back together and then he claimed the girl was his cousin though he has yet to give any tangible proof. I feel like I gave him enough time to be able to explain and I don't know why I kept giving him chances to prove me wrong All this time I've been so faithful to him. Always going over to try to see him and making an effort to get close with his family even though he never does that with mine anymore. I just don't understand why I care so much about a person who has caused me so much pain and grief and I seriously gave my all for him and cared for him so much. Every time I try to voice my concerns he finds little things that make me feel bad like the time I didn't tell him I took a classmates number just in case we ever miss class we can fill each other in. He made me cry in public in the middle of dinner and never made I it a point to console me. I find that every time I cry he either mocks me or becomes really indifferent. I don't understand I care for him so much and I feel like we've been through so much but how can he treat me so coldly without any concern? Please any advice will be greatly appreciated
KaliLove Posted April 20, 2014 Posted April 20, 2014 Yuck, why would you want to salvage that relationship? He's such a jerk! 2
zen2475 Posted April 20, 2014 Posted April 20, 2014 The excuse that his brother made the account is not only wholly specious, but downright insulting. Really, who does that? You don't say why you were on and off for three years, but that alone is a big enough indicator the relationship was not working anyway. Considering his lies, childish, callous behavior and his blame shifting, this guy is just not relationship material. I know you are in pain, but you really deserve to much better than this guy. Please go into NC and start working on healing. 1
TaraMaiden Posted April 20, 2014 Posted April 20, 2014 Three words: Waste. Of. Time. Go No Contact, read the guide in my signature and kick him to the kerb. I find it stunning that you even need to ask, to be honest. Really, I do. You seem an intelligent, coherent, articulate girl, yet you find this a dilemma? PLEASE!! 3
Author miffymars Posted April 21, 2014 Author Posted April 21, 2014 Thank you everyone for your responses! I feel like I need to hear this because I've let him come back into my life though I tried to leave him before because of his mistreatment I just want to stop the cycle and allowing him to treat me that way. I always seem to go back to him even when I'm aware that it's not the right thing to do. I'm just scared I'll go back to him again and I feel I need help and guidance to end this.
Elle1975 Posted April 21, 2014 Posted April 21, 2014 I've been with him for 3 years it's been on and off. He broke up with me through text saying his job was too much after a month he came back begging and pleading and then I took him back only to have my friend find him on Plenty of Fish. Then I find pictures of him with a girl on his Itouch taken days after he broke up with me the first time. I confronted him on both occasions and have been met with bogus stories saying his brother made the account because he didn't know that we were back together and then he claimed the girl was his cousin though he has yet to give any tangible proof. I feel like I gave him enough time to be able to explain and I don't know why I kept giving him chances to prove me wrong All this time I've been so faithful to him. Always going over to try to see him and making an effort to get close with his family even though he never does that with mine anymore. I just don't understand why I care so much about a person who has caused me so much pain and grief and I seriously gave my all for him and cared for him so much. Every time I try to voice my concerns he finds little things that make me feel bad like the time I didn't tell him I took a classmates number just in case we ever miss class we can fill each other in. He made me cry in public in the middle of dinner and never made I it a point to console me. I find that every time I cry he either mocks me or becomes really indifferent. I don't understand I care for him so much and I feel like we've been through so much but how can he treat me so coldly without any concern? Please any advice will be greatly appreciated Oh hun, what a drama nest.. Why would you want so much stress and drama into your life? Sit down and think about it (seriously). Why staying with a guy who makes you cry? I find there's not a lot of things really worth crying over. The end of a relationship? Sure, cry for a couple days, but don't linger over it. There's nothing to salvage.. he's not a good guy. I suspect you're in love with being in love here.. find someone who will treat you right. "good guys" are out there. 1
Author miffymars Posted April 21, 2014 Author Posted April 21, 2014 Thank you Elle I really appreciate it I'll try my hardest not to linger on it. I kind of wish he knew what he did wrong..
Zahara Posted April 21, 2014 Posted April 21, 2014 What are you salvaging? He's not invested. What would you be inheriting even if you were able to salvage it? Start really drumming down on the reality versus emotionally hanging on to it.
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