Jay779 Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Im dating a girl who is 22 years old who has never had a boyfriend before, and still lives with her parents. We've been dating 3 months and in the first few weeks, I thought it was going decently well. We would go out on dates and have a good time, and we had our first kiss(only a peck) on the third date. Slow, but not bad I thought. Well, its been 2 months since then and we still haven't progressed physically. Our dates since then have only consisted of hanging out with her family because apparently she isn't allowed to be alone with me in private(really confused about this). Thats all we ever do is I go to her house and have dinner and watch tv with her family. I have tried to progress things physically, but she says its too fast, and the fact that her family is nearby makes it even more awkward. Even making out with her is moving too fast according to her, so all we ever do is hug, kiss on the cheek, and light pecks on the lips. Over the past few weeks, we haven't even been able to hang out a lot because she says she's busy with school and we don't even text that much anymore. Should I just move on, is this a lost cause? She seems pretty immature for her age.
Wisecrack Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Never be afraid to move on. I find the 21st century person is way too much of a p*ssy (me included). If things are not working, save BOTH of you guys the trouble and meet new people. She may even try harder knowing to win you back knowing you are willing to walk away. 1
mammasita Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 I think you have your answer. If she's too "slow" for your taste then move on. IMO, she sounds extremely sheltered. She's 22 for goodness sake, does she need her parents permission to blow her nose?? 2
todreaminblue Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 I think you have your answer. If she's too "slow" for your taste then move on. IMO, she sounds extremely sheltered. She's 22 for goodness sake, does she need her parents permission to blow her nose?? in my opinion she probably has a religious inspired upbringing that family around, is say, a public date.......that sex isn't going to happen and that he should really talk to her about her beliefs and what she is comfortable with and what she isnt .....he should also let her know what he would like to happen what he expects and there will be no confusion,no time wasting on either side...... its nt abotu permission to get her nosed wiped at all........obviously permission has been given by the parents to invite him into their home......its about safe guarding and protection ......she is a virgin probably..or maybe been used in the past and heartbroken...... now they tread carefully with who she meets and protection is in place.......he needs to ask her if he is serious about her or move on if sex i swhat he is after, aint gonna happen in my opinion.....parents are parents for life no parent wants to see a daughter used at any age.........deb 1
freetolove Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 obviously you two have different values, go find someone that works for you and stop trying to blame her and torture yourself about it.
Potion9 Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Give her time if you like her that much. If not, move on. 2months isn't that long anyways. Especially when you describe your dates being around her family the whole time etc.
The dot Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Im dating a girl who is 22 years old who has never had a boyfriend before, and still lives with her parents. We've been dating 3 months and in the first few weeks, I thought it was going decently well. We would go out on dates and have a good time, and we had our first kiss(only a peck) on the third date. Slow, but not bad I thought. Well, its been 2 months since then and we still haven't progressed physically. Our dates since then have only consisted of hanging out with her family because apparently she isn't allowed to be alone with me in private(really confused about this). Thats all we ever do is I go to her house and have dinner and watch tv with her family. I have tried to progress things physically, but she says its too fast, and the fact that her family is nearby makes it even more awkward. Even making out with her is moving too fast according to her, so all we ever do is hug, kiss on the cheek, and light pecks on the lips. Over the past few weeks, we haven't even been able to hang out a lot because she says she's busy with school and we don't even text that much anymore. Should I just move on, is this a lost cause? She seems pretty immature for her age. Short answer: 22 is too young for a serious relationship anyway. By all means continue to date her if you're having fun, but don't expect a life long commitment from her or anything serious for a few years yet.
KatZee Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 (edited) People are raised differently. Just because she behaves one one doesn't make her "immature." Listen, I grew up just like this girl. My mother was always very tight leashed and didn't allow certain things to happen under her roof. 22 really isn't OLD. It's still fairly young. At 22 my mother never me be alone in my bedroom with boys. If someone came over the house we had to stay in the den to watch TV or hang out. My parents wouldn't sit with us always, sometimes they watched a show and then went to bed, but it was drilled in that, "Hey... we're right in the next room. No funny business." Not being allowed to be together alone "in private" is really not all that confusing. I'm not sure why you are. Her parents don't want her making bad decisions. They've been around the block, they know exactly what a 22 year old guy is after. And no, it's not love and marriage. You're new, they don't know you, and they're not just going to allow you to do whatever the hell you want under their roof. 22 and "still lives with her parents" ?? I'm sorry is this confusing to you? I was still in college at 22. I didn't have a salaried job or parents that could just give me thousands of dollars for rent. Virtually NO ONE can live on their own at 22. I didn't move out into my first apartment until I was 27. It's way too difficult. And yes, I had "rules" even when I was 27. I was living rent free under my parents roof so I really didn't have any right to throw a fit or rebel. They could have tossed me out on my a.ss or charged me rent. She doesn't feel comfortable being physical with you just yet. Honestly, when I hear this, I always know that the guy isn't doing something right. You're not making her feel safe and you're not connecting with her on a level which is allowing her to open up and feel that comfort with you. Instead, you're getting increasingly agitated, impatient, annoyed... and I'm sure those vibes come through loud and clear. This isn't going to make her open up to you any faster. If you don't have the patience to keep your dick in your pants and respect the girl you're in a relationship with, move on and find someone who spreads the legs easily. Problem solved. I'm also not sure why you just go hang out at her house. Why are you not taking her out on proper dates? Edited April 18, 2014 by KatZee
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