arghzme Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Why do people fall out of love? Wasn't it supposed to be an eternal thing? Weren't you supposed to experience true love just once in life? I'm begging to question the concept of love. Is it just one of those things created to satisfy our selfish need for affiliation?
elseaacych Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 People fail to realize that loving, once the initial buzz of "being in love" wears off is a conscious choice you have to make each and every day. In some instances, where people are naturally compatible, for example, this is very easy. However, when people are less compatible, there is a little more work involved. Feelings of "being in love" fluctuate with a long term partner, but love can always be there if you both actively choose to be there for each other. It isn't all butterflies. 6
KaliLove Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 There's no such thing as supposed to when it comes to emotions. Everyone is different.
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 What do you even mean by 'love'? Please define this term as it relates to you (rhetorically, of course). As for 'the one'? Nah, that's BS. There are many people you will be seriously attracted to (and them to you) throughout your life. Some will be there for a short time, if at all, and others for a longer duration. Just remember, NOTHING is forever... Comparability is another issue all together...
forever_lost Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Why do people fall out of love? Wasn't it supposed to be an eternal thing? Weren't you supposed to experience true love just once in life? I'm begging to question the concept of love. Is it just one of those things created to satisfy our selfish need for affiliation? I'm struggling with the same question myself. But maybe it's all relative, and you'll realize when you attain true love that what you had before wasn't anything close, even when it seemed like it was everything then. Maybe. But five months afterwards and I'm still pessimistic that I will ever come close.
sooshi Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 I don't think that being in love and actually loving someone is the same thing. At least, I don't feel they are. I think that love is lasting, and that everything else that people call love doesn't last because it really isn't love at all. 1
zyketti Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 I don't think that being in love and actually loving someone is the same thing. At least, I don't feel they are. I think that love is lasting, and that everything else that people call love doesn't last because it really isn't love at all. I agree…. People say it all the time, I love you but I am not in love with you. For example, I love my ex for the experiences that we shared together for 7 years. She has moved on with another guy 1 week after BU, but I love her enough to say that I am very happy for her and the bf that they're doing well. However, I'm in no shape to be IN love with her. I'm still in love with my recent ex tho loooll...
hoping2heal Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 love does seem to be eternal, for some. The best anyone can do is find someone compatible with a good head on their shoulders that shares the same beliefs as them about commitment. Maybe that will be lifelong, perhaps not. Too many people (and I don't mean this in a judgemental way, I've been guilty of the same in the past) ignore red flags that are obvious tell tale signs of a persons flaky character, or incompatibilities, etc. "He/she isn't right for me, but I want him/her to be!" But, still nothing is guaranteed.
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Love is a subjective term. It holds different meanings to each of us. People "fall" in love and "out" of love all the time. Now, love isn't some meter like you see at sports games when they tell you to cheer and the meter goes higher or lower. It's a feeling. You cant explain it, you cant describe it...you just feel it. Some people can claim they feel that way and say they are, but dont REALLY feel it. Some people get love confused with infatuation or lust... I dont agree we only love one person our whole life. Now, some people MAY find one person and love that ONE person and die with that person. That does happen, but doesnt mean that's the ONLY way to go. To the OP's point, it sounds like you are hurt from a BU and questioning love because you are hurt. I get it that's cool....but thinking rationally, you will love again. You will find that feeling again....usually when you arent looking for it.
Koopa Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Love is literally a drug, check out this article about the chemicals your brain releases when you are in "love" Brain in Love, Brain Chemicals, Brain Science - Posit Science
pickflicker Posted April 18, 2014 Posted April 18, 2014 Why do people fall out of love? Wasn't it supposed to be an eternal thing? Weren't you supposed to experience true love just once in life? I'm begging to question the concept of love. Is it just one of those things created to satisfy our selfish need for affiliation? The right love is. The wrong one isn't. 1
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