Hungup123 Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 I've been on two dates with a girl. Things were seemingly good. Had a date tonight planned to go bowling and grab a drink afterwords. I get a text that she needs to drive downtown to pick up her friend from the airport and feels its best that we just cancel for the night. I respond with okay. A couple hours later she texts me she will be out of town this weekend for a friends birthday and can't do anything this weekend either. I didn't ask, nor did I particularly care. Why did she feel the need to tell me this, and what should I text her aside from another "okay"?
Keenly Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 I've been on two dates with a girl. Things were seemingly good. Had a date tonight planned to go bowling and grab a drink afterwords. I get a text that she needs to drive downtown to pick up her friend from the airport and feels its best that we just cancel for the night. I respond with okay. A couple hours later she texts me she will be out of town this weekend for a friends birthday and can't do anything this weekend either. I didn't ask, nor did I particularly care. Why did she feel the need to tell me this, and what should I text her aside from another "okay"? Just say alright. Then ask her out next week.
Strength in Healing Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Yeah, I wouldn't give up. Sounds like she is keeping you informed, may not be flaking.
Author Hungup123 Posted April 17, 2014 Author Posted April 17, 2014 Well I always used the general rule that if she didn't offer up another date or rearrangements in some way her interest level was too low. I'm not sure if I should take the fact that she told me she was busy this weekend as a double whammy or a light at the end of the tunnel.
PegNosePete Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Which is more important to you, your rules or seeing this girl again? 2
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 I've been on two dates with a girl. Things were seemingly good. Had a date tonight planned to go bowling and grab a drink afterwords. I get a text that she needs to drive downtown to pick up her friend from the airport and feels its best that we just cancel for the night. I respond with okay. A couple hours later she texts me she will be out of town this weekend for a friends birthday and can't do anything this weekend either. I didn't ask, nor did I particularly care. Why did she feel the need to tell me this, and what should I text her aside from another "okay"? I would just write. "Okay! Have fun :)" though I would wait for her to initiate any contact later on. The airport thing would kind of irk me though. Did she not anticipate having to pick her friend up? Don't see why she had to cancel the date.
Strength in Healing Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Well I always used the general rule that if she didn't offer up another date or rearrangements in some way her interest level was too low. I'm not sure if I should take the fact that she told me she was busy this weekend as a double whammy or a light at the end of the tunnel. Some... most... girls wait for the guy to make all the moves/plans initially.
Author Hungup123 Posted April 17, 2014 Author Posted April 17, 2014 Which is more important to you, your rules or seeing this girl again? Haha what? Its more about not wasting time on someone who has very little interest in me.
soccerrprp Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Well I always used the general rule that if she didn't offer up another date or rearrangements in some way her interest level was too low. I'm not sure if I should take the fact that she told me she was busy this weekend as a double whammy or a light at the end of the tunnel. She could have been telling you that her whole weekend was going to be occupied with friend in town. So, ask her for next weekend. Or she could be telling you that she's not interested, so don't even bother....the only way to find out for certain is to ask her out again.
Author Hungup123 Posted April 17, 2014 Author Posted April 17, 2014 She could have been telling you that her whole weekend was going to be occupied with friend in town. So, ask her for next weekend. Or she could be telling you that she's not interested, so don't even bother....the only way to find out for certain is to ask her out again. Thats most likely what I'll do. Say a quick "have fun, maybe some other time", and then let some time pass and see when shes free. Then I'll know for sure. 1
Author Hungup123 Posted April 17, 2014 Author Posted April 17, 2014 Always act with class! Some men are notorious for pouting or acting passive aggressive. All of us woman have this experience with some guy. Red flag! What does a woman want to hear? 'I understand...it 's nice to catch up with a friend. Have a good time. I like being with you so I'll call you next week'. While I agree with you that acting mature and not butt hurt is the best way to go; don't know if I'd go as far as saying "I like being with you and will call you next week". Seems way too forward especially after two dates and considering she flaked on me. 1
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 While I agree with you that acting mature and not butt hurt is the best way to go; don't know if I'd go as far as saying "I like being with you and will call you next week". Seems way too forward especially after two dates and considering she flaked on me. It's a tad beta.
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 My take is be mature but not too nice. She did last minute cancel on you. It's no time to roll out the red carpet for her. I would be cordial but flippant.
Madman81 Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 It definitely feels like she's trying to blow you off. I'd go with something like "No worries, have a great time at the birthday. Text me when you're back in town and I'll take you out somewhere fun." That way the ball is in her court, you're expressing interest in seeing her again, and you're not coming across as mopey. Meanwhile, make it a point to have fun this weekend with friends. Don't dwell on this one girl. Enjoy life, even though she's not there. If she doesn't text you next week, you know everything you need to know. If she does text you and actually, properly blows you off, at least you haven't spent a weekend pining and moping. You'll be able to respond with "That's okay, I was feeling the same way. All the best." And you'll be able to move on with your dignity intact. And if she texts you and wants to see you again, it's because she knows that you WEREN'T all mopey, that you're a fun, vital, busy guy with lots of stuff going on, and she'll be attracted by that. 1
LifeIsGreat Posted April 17, 2014 Posted April 17, 2014 Yeah, what ^^^^ said. You have already been out with her a couple times so there is no reason YOU have to do ALL the work. Tell her to have fun and CALL you when she gets back, and then let it go. If she is interested, she will text/call. If you don't hear from her don't bother calling back. I have experience with this. Some women don't mind you doing all the work and will continue to see you as long as they don't have to do anything. In the end, YOU wind up with the broken heart. Allow a woman to show that's she is interested in you, but do it in a non-dickish way.
Recommended Posts