How to support my friend?

[AnneT1985]

Hi y'all!

 

 

Can I get your thoughts and opinions please?

 

 

I have a friend who is kind, generous, hilarious and extremely creative. She wouldn't hurt a fly and there isn't a mean bone in her body. She can be very high functioning and is a high achieving student, a good mother and wife and friend. That being said she can display some paranoia, distorted and confused, obsessive thinking but instead of taking it out on others will self isolate and retreat. She revealed to me recently and privately that she suffers with a very serious mental health issue and doesn't want to get close to others for fear of them "finding out about the real her" or "hurting anyone" (not physically to be clear). She is such a likeable person but keeps others at a real distance. She told me has been advised not to have more children due to her medication regimen and the fact that high stress can push her over the edge.

 

 

She is extremely responsible and seeks help and takes personal responsibility for her illness, but I can't imagine her suffering. Some of our mutual friends don't "get" her at all but they also don't know about her condition because she can "hide" it so very well when she isn't self isolating.

 

 

What can I possibly do to support her? She brings such kindness and love to people, truly. I think she is so awesome to be battling such demons with such grace. I wish I could explain this situation to people who complain about her "weirdness" or "standoffishness" but I'd never disrespect her wishes.

 

 

Anyways how can I support my friend? What would y'all do?

Thanks so much and I hope my post makes sense xx

[BHsigh]

Hi y'all!

 

 

Can I get your thoughts and opinions please?

 

 

I have a friend who is kind, generous, hilarious and extremely creative. She wouldn't hurt a fly and there isn't a mean bone in her body. She can be very high functioning and is a high achieving student, a good mother and wife and friend. That being said she can display some paranoia, distorted and confused, obsessive thinking but instead of taking it out on others will self isolate and retreat. She revealed to me recently and privately that she suffers with a very serious mental health issue and doesn't want to get close to others for fear of them "finding out about the real her" or "hurting anyone" (not physically to be clear). She is such a likeable person but keeps others at a real distance. She told me has been advised not to have more children due to her medication regimen and the fact that high stress can push her over the edge.

 

 

She is extremely responsible and seeks help and takes personal responsibility for her illness, but I can't imagine her suffering. Some of our mutual friends don't "get" her at all but they also don't know about her condition because she can "hide" it so very well when she isn't self isolating.

 

 

What can I possibly do to support her? She brings such kindness and love to people, truly. I think she is so awesome to be battling such demons with such grace. I wish I could explain this situation to people who complain about her "weirdness" or "standoffishness" but I'd never disrespect her wishes.

 

 

Anyways how can I support my friend? What would y'all do?

Thanks so much and I hope my post makes sense xx

 

Honestly, it sounds like you're already supporting her by being a good friend, and being able to look past her "weirdness" to how she truly is. I would just suggest carrying on as you are and just be as good of a friend as you can be.

 

If you hear someone complaining about her again, do respect her wishes and keep her issues to yourself, but kindly tell those complainers that she is your very good friend, and that her "weirdness" is just a part of her. Explain to them that once you look past the "weirdness" and "standoffishness" and get to know her, that she is a really fun person that is really intelligent and has a good heart.

[AnneT1985]

Thank you very much