bobby326 Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Hey guys, try to make this a quick one. So I've been seeing this girl for about 2 months now, see each other several times a week, have slept together and talk via text almost everyday. I like her but have had doubts about her because she's very hot and cold which can be frustrating. Anyway, we had the "where is this going" talk a few weeks ago and she said that she can't even think about a commitment or relationship in the immediate future but she's not writing anything off, basically she wants to be casual right now and not feel the pressure of "where is this going" because she wants to be happy with where she is in her life and she was hurt by her previous bf. Anyway, to my question, I met a girl last week, very cool, asked her out for a drink later this week. I feel kind of guilty, not like I'm cheating or anything but almost feel like I should tell the girl I have been seeing. I'm going to her place tonight to hang out and wanted to know what you guys would do. Should I tell her I'm getting drinks with this girl later this week or just wait and see if it goes beyond this 1 date? I know I shouldn't feel guilty because she made it very clear that she doesn't want a relationship right now and I need to assume that she could be seeing other people as well but I've never dated multiple people so this is all new to me. Anyway, wanted to get your thoughts. Thanks!
TheNewMe2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 You had the talk and she wanted to be casual - she wasn't willing to commit exclusively to you. So, you have the right to date whoever you want and tell her or not tell her. There shouldn't be guilt. For all you know she is doing the same thing. 3
LustAppeal Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 I'd definitely do a little digging into what she wants out of you. If she just wants to be friends with benefits then why tell her until u become serious with someone. This might come off as u trying to create competition. Be blunt abiut your feelings, and what you want. It's your dating life at stake too.
Author bobby326 Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 I'd definitely do a little digging into what she wants out of you. If she just wants to be friends with benefits then why tell her until u become serious with someone. This might come off as u trying to create competition. Be blunt abiut your feelings, and what you want. It's your dating life at stake too. I mean we had a pretty detailed talk, I told her that I thought it was going somewhere and she said that she can't be in a relationship right now but likes Me and enjoys hanging out with me. She never said, go ahead and date Other people but if your not willing to commit then it's not fair to think that your the only one. Per the other comment, I doubt she's dating other people just because we talk all the time and every time she's not busy with work we hang out but it's definitely possible and I have to assume she is. If she wasn't so hot and cold all the time I would want to be exclusive with her right now and I would tell her that but she's so back and forth that it frustrates me, even my friends ask why I continue to hang out with her since I rarely have good Things to say about her.
LustAppeal Posted April 15, 2014 Posted April 15, 2014 Well in that case you're definitely on the right path. You're looking for a relationship and she isn't, it'd be irresponsible of her to think you're going to stay single and not try looking for a relationship.
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