Cpt Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 Hey guys I will keep this short as possible. Basically my gf was being somewhat different a couple of days ago being really sweet and flirty with me (more than usual) and I felt really good about US (not about myself). I thought we were moving forward to a new level in our bonding process, and she asked me for a huge favour and I said i'll see what I can do. Well turns out she asked her sister for this favour first and she had declined the favour. I feel betrayed a little. Am I overreacting or is my deflated mood justified? This is the first time this has happened. She is a little distant with me for the most part, thats why I feel decieved.
quidproquo89 Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 what was the favour? I can't see how asking her family first is a big deal
sagetalk Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 It sounds like you have a lot to learn grasshopper. How old are you?
Author Cpt Posted April 14, 2014 Author Posted April 14, 2014 I think there was a misunderstanding with my OP. I am not offended about her asking her family first. I am offended that she is usually distant/cold torwards me (not to an unlikeable amount), and her acting sweet and flirtacious with me made me feel like she was finally opening up to me on a deeper level and made me feel really good about us. Now I realise that it was all am act to get me to say yes to the favour, since her sister refused the favour because its a big ask. She was asking if I could get concert tickets for her best friend too (she already has tickets).
Author Cpt Posted April 14, 2014 Author Posted April 14, 2014 Kind of like seducing me to do something she wants, manipulation much. I feel like a white night now since I said I would think about it.... I will not be doing this favour for her.
d0nnivain Posted April 14, 2014 Posted April 14, 2014 Can you get me concert tickets is not a big ask. Can I borrow $10,000 or will you donate a kidney to save my life are big asks. If you think your GF was only sweet to you because she wanted something, that is a problem. Watch to see if you notice a trend. If you do, be very wary of this girl.
TXGuy Posted April 14, 2014 Posted April 14, 2014 In the world of the Internet and 'stubhub' type websites, concert tickets are as easy to get as pulling out your credit card. So she is not really asking for effort, but cash. But, not for herself, but her friend? That is strange. You said the GF is already going to the concert. With you? (If not with you, she might be asking you to finance her date with a broke badboy). In any event, I would decline. The fact that she only gets particularly affectionate when she wants into your wallet is a bad sign. If she goes cold or breaks up over this, you will have dodged a bullet.
Cunning_Linguist Posted April 14, 2014 Posted April 14, 2014 I would definitely decline. I don't provide money or equal stuff for women unless it's on my terms or if she is a good friend in need. It reinforces that gold digger, superficial behavior, that she can use you.
Pasttense Posted April 14, 2014 Posted April 14, 2014 If "she is usually distant/cold towards you" why exactly is she still your girlfriend? This would seem to be a good reason to dump her.
Author Cpt Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 The concert ticket is slightly over US$800. I am going with her, in fact a big group of us are going but her best friend can't afford it and she wants me to pay for her, and not get my money back (thats why its a huge favour in my books). I mentioned that her coldness/distance torwards me is not to the point that its worth dumping her, i'm just used to more affection from my ex's. This time she got sweet because she wanted something from me. It is a problem, but how big of a problem is it and why?
TaraMaiden Posted April 21, 2014 Posted April 21, 2014 It's as huge a problem as you going to some shady, backstreet disreputable tattooist and getting the word 'tamrood' tattooed on your forehead.... Your problem is that you still want her to like you so much, you'd do anything to coax an approving smile form her. Man up, say no and tell her to take a hike. see how long she sweet-talks you after that. She would like you because you're putty in her hands, not because you are a nice person.
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