texassailor Posted February 2, 2005 Posted February 2, 2005 I met my now ex-gf two years ago this month. We immediately fell in love and had what seemed like the perfect relationship for the first year. I'm 28 years old, divorced, and have had my share of romantic relationships both good and bad. I can honestly say that I never fell for anyone like I fell for her. My ex and I are both Christians and we were both committed to waiting till marriage before having sex. Nonetheless we spent every night together either at her house or at mine. The whole time we shared a bed I noticed that she did not sleep well. Slowly she explained how she had been raped a few years before meeting me, and that she had nightmares about the attack. I urged her to get help and she did. Things began to change after she told her family about the assault. During this period my ex was having almost hourly panic attacks, and was unable to drive, or do simple things like dress herself. I helped out in these areas, but once her family found out about the assault it was almost like they blamed me for the attack, despite the fact that I didn't even know her when it happened. I flew her mother and her father down here to spend some time with her, and at that time her mother told me that my ex was not herself, and that as soon as she again became herself she wouldn't want to be with me. Her mother then told my ex that I was the one making her sick because I wanted to control her. Her parents went back home, and things pretty much went back to normal. My ex was getting therapy and feeling better, and we were happy. Things went on like this for a year, until her mother again came to visit, approximately one year later. I was out of town at the time on a military deployment. Two days after her mother arrived I received an e-mail from my ex breaking up with me. It basically indicated that she wanted to be by herself, and not to contact her. I wanted to respect her wishes but she had my car keys, house keys, and access to my bank account. As soon as I arrived in a location where I could make a phone call I tried calling her. This was approximately four days later. I called about fifteen times over three days, and never left a message, or got an answer. My ex was often out during the day, and I never imagined that she was staring at the phone unwilling to speak to me. After three days I gave up trying and figured that I'd talk to her when I got back to the States. I received an e-mail the next day from my chain of command stating that she had accused me of harrassing her, and that I was to cease and desist immediately. When I got home I found that my house was still full of her things. I waited for about three days, and then packed up everything and left it on her doorstep. (She lives in a very safe neighboorhood, so theft was not an issue). I enclosed a note stating that I wanted to make sure she had her things, as I couldn't heal if I had to look at them all day. She took the note to my command and once again filed a harrasment complaint. She has told all my friends that I was controlling and that I'm now stalking her. I was out of the country the last six months of our relationship, and I have countless e-mails from her saying how much she loved me and was happy to be with me. I've never had a girl say things like this about me, and it makes me wonder if she's totally deranged, or there's something in myself that I don't see. My friends seem to think that her parents have brainwashed her, but I guess I always thought that she was a stronger person than that. I guess my question is Am I crazy, or is she? Thanks for reading.
BrainRightHeartWrong Posted February 2, 2005 Posted February 2, 2005 she is crazy! NOT YOU! a schizo girl like this will wreck your head, yes she has maybe been raped etc. and that is terrible but you shouldn't bear the brunt of her issues you did the best you could... got her therapy, cared for her etc. what else could you have done?
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