krista28 Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 (edited) So I been seeing this guy for the last month. He seems sweet and all amd we like seeing eachother but it seems I wanna spend more time with him then he does. It seems everytime the weekend comes hes got better stuff to do. Like im an accessory. I've talked to him about this before but he doesnt seem to care. He said I saw u thursday night why do I have to see u today. He says he needs to balance his time more but ive kinda had it. To be when u have a boyfriend u wanna spend at least one day on the weekend together. he says he cares but I think the whole ditching me on weekends thing might be because he doesn't really care about me. I feel so ****ty.. Edited April 12, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
ja123 Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 He makes you feel so bad because you allow it. If he's unavailable, giving you mixed messages, and being a dick, then cut him off unequivocally and move on. Problem solved. 4
Pasttense Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 A month is simply too short a period of time to have this kind of expectation. See how it changes over the next couple months. If it doesn't improve then move on.
GemmaUK Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 I'm very laid back but if I wasn't seeing a new man on one night over the weekend I would walk and not look back.
Gaeta Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 So I been seeing this guy for the last month. He seems sweet and all amd we like seeing eachother but it seems I wanna spend more time with him then he does. It seems everytime the weekend comes hes got better stuff to do. Like im an accessory. I've talked to him about this before but he doesnt seem to care. He said I saw u thursday night why do I have to see u today. He says he needs to balance his time more but ive kinda had it. To be when u have a boyfriend u wanna spend at least one day on the weekend together. Because your idea of what dating should be, and your priorities are different. When that happens you break up and try to find someone that sees dating the same way you do. You spoke to him about it, which is great, he doesn't care so now you know it's time to move on to next guy. 2
Gaeta Posted April 12, 2014 Posted April 12, 2014 A month is simply too short a period of time to have this kind of expectation. See how it changes over the next couple months. If it doesn't improve then move on. That's disturbing. Dating IS about having dates on weekends. If over 1 month he never had time to take her out on a date then **** him. Sorry for the language. No need to let him treat her like a back up plan for another 2 months. She is not even a weekend back up plan! She's a weekday back up plan. How fun is that! 2
sagetalk Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 I feel so ****ty.. Sounds like he has his act together. If you flake out by getting controlling, he has his answer about whether he should be with you. This is a two way street. No real man wants a bossy or controlling woman. He's seeing you once a week, I don't see a problem here other than him having the nerve to be normal and not to get too obsessed too quickly.
hoping2heal Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 . He says he needs to balance his time more but ive kinda had it. I guess the make or break would be in this thing about balancing time. Does he work and go to school and he needs the weekends for those responsibilities or he needs to balance his time between you and going out with the bronies for boobs and beer. I don't know what his schedule and life demands are, he might just have a very busy life and he's trying the best he can to give you time. which, what he can give might not be enough for you and if it isn't you can always walk.
Leigh 87 Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 Guys want to have fun on the weekend so what's the big deal? We work hard during the week (some of us anyway) and we want to blow of some steam with our guy friends, deal with it. A guy who is nuts about a girl he meets would still blow of steam with his mates but he wouldn't WANT to spend both days of the weekend with his mates ahead of his girl. A guy who is nuts about a girl doesn't need the entire weekend to his mates. Every guy I have ever known has spent one day of eat weekend with their girl, IF they were really into her. You can take a girl WITH you to hang with your friends. AND have a night out with the boys. Friday and Saturday night with the boys would be MORE than enough time to blow of steam, there is no reason why a man who was crazy about a girl would ALSO need Sunday to himself, after already spending two nights "letting of steam" 2
OhThatGirl Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 It's as simple as this: He said "I spent Thursday with you, why would I spend today too?" UHHHH... Because he wants to? He really enjoys your company? He is excited about you? You two can't wait to do thing things together? So the fact that time with you seems to be more of an obligation or duty than something he chooses to do because he enjoys it.. one word... NEXT!! There are guys out there that want to give you the almighty Saturday... Then they will want you to come out and play on Sunday too. Believe me. 3
Author krista28 Posted April 13, 2014 Author Posted April 13, 2014 I agree and the fun ny thing is he was the one who came after me. Hes making me feel like I dont matter even tho he claims to be falling for me. Thanks for your advice as much as it hurt me I ended things...your right I felt like an obligation.
spiderowl Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 I am sorry but he's not that interested or he would be making more effort. It's no reflection on you, it's just the kind of guy he is. Do you like him as a person? Is he nice, kind, thoughtful, considerate towards you? It's easy to feel attracted to someone without actually looking at their true personality. It sounds like you are attracted but he is not the guy you need. Honestly, you can do better than this guy. Think 'The right guy for me will want to spend time with me, will be kind and caring. I won't have to doubt his commitment.' Does this guy match up? No! Value yourself and your standards and ditch him. Strangely enough, the less rubbish you accept from guys, the more they will sense you are someone who they should respect. You will find you are getting better offers.
MidwestUSA Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 Good for you for ditching him, krista. On to better things and a guy who wants to spend time with you.
Author krista28 Posted April 13, 2014 Author Posted April 13, 2014 It does hurt a lot but your right the guy doesn't want to do the work it takes to have that relationship. Snowboarding sports and ghis friends will always come first.
JourneyLady Posted April 13, 2014 Posted April 13, 2014 Guys want to have fun on the weekend so what's the big deal? We work hard during the week (some of us anyway) and we want to blow of some steam with our guy friends, deal with it. IF being around her is not "fun", then what is it? If she's not fun for him to be around then they should both move on. Because if it's not enjoyable initially, it won't get better.
Author krista28 Posted April 14, 2014 Author Posted April 14, 2014 i agree... im boring to him. his friends are more fun.
Author krista28 Posted April 15, 2014 Author Posted April 15, 2014 I guess the make or break would be in this thing about balancing time. Does he work and go to school and he needs the weekends for those responsibilities or he needs to balance his time between you and going out with the bronies for boobs and beer. I don't know what his schedule and life demands are, he might just have a very busy life and he's trying the best he can to give you time. which, what he can give might not be enough for you and if it isn't you can always walk. No hes not in school and hes not that busy. He likes to spend as little time aroumd me as possible...likes me around unless it cuts into his bronie time. ..I think hed be better off gay. Anyhow the guy had me wrapped around his finger but was too selfish to give bcack...gonna try not to take it personal...I realise now its pretty much completely over.
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