Physical attraction to my Dr?

[Maria92]

Hi everyone, this is my first post here so I'm not sure where to post this really.

 

So basically I am 22 - from the UK (female). I have been seeing my GP (who is about 36 I think) on and off for four years. I've always liked and dated older men.

The first time I met him I thought he was quite attractive but nothing more - and then as I started seeing him on a more frequent basis I found myself thinking about him quite a lot. He's not exactly my type (and he's married!) but there is just something about his manner and .. Well, just him that I am very attracted to. I do feel a lot of shame thinking this - but also a weird sort of jealousy and annoyance that he's taken. I do feel a sort of bond with him - I've been to see him in some very dark times and he was always kind, attentive, and seemed to care a lot. He went out of his way to go above his duty to help me. I find that very attractive in itself.

I'm not good at picking up on "vibes" but we have held eye contact a lot and i have caught him looking at me "in that way" before, as I've stood up to leave and also when I've turned my back to walk out the door - sort of checking me out sneakily.

So my question is how do I deal with this - On the one hand feeling like I'm a creep, and on the other hand feeling hopelessly attracted to him! I know if I met him in a bar I would chat to him... - Help

Edited April 12, 2014 by Maria92

[GemmaUK]

A. He is a professional so it's his job to be just as you describe. Part of a Dr's job is to look at the person and look at their whole behaviour as well as treating the issue they attended clinic for.

He will do this with all of his patients. My doc is female and she does the same...yep even down to looking at my whole body as I walk out of her clinic. She is married to a man and is not lesbian (as far as I am aware).

 

B. He is married.

 

C. I do get you. I had a little crush on my physio at one stage and also quite liked one of the male Dr's at my GP surgery. Both were/are off limits. It's OK to have crushes though. It really is all it is.

[d0nnivain]

What you are experiecing is so common it has aname: transference.

 

It's not real & your doctor dosen't feel the same way. Enjoy the fantasy but don't do anything about it or say anything. If you can't contain yourself, get a new doctor.

[Woggle]

Just consider it a crush and move on.

[stillafool]

My doctor listens to me and spends alot of time with me. He is quite thorough in everything he does. He doesn't do it because he has a crush on me it's because he is a professional who goes above and beyond in order to do the best job possible for his patients. Your doctor is a married man and that alone should deter you. Nothing is going to come of your crush so you may as well get over it now. Aren't there plenty of guys in their 20's to date rather than crushing on a married doctor with kids?

[KaliLove]

Hi everyone, this is my first post here so I'm not sure where to post this really.

 

So basically I am 22 - from the UK (female). I have been seeing my GP (who is about 36 I think) on and off for four years. I've always liked and dated older men.

The first time I met him I thought he was quite attractive but nothing more - and then as I started seeing him on a more frequent basis I found myself thinking about him quite a lot. He's not exactly my type (and he's married!) but there is just something about his manner and .. Well, just him that I am very attracted to. I do feel a lot of shame thinking this - but also a weird sort of jealousy and annoyance that he's taken. I do feel a sort of bond with him - I've been to see him in some very dark times and he was always kind, attentive, and seemed to care a lot. He went out of his way to go above his duty to help me. I find that very attractive in itself.

I'm not good at picking up on "vibes" but we have held eye contact a lot and i have caught him looking at me "in that way" before, as I've stood up to leave and also when I've turned my back to walk out the door - sort of checking me out sneakily.

So my question is how do I deal with this - On the one hand feeling like I'm a creep, and on the other hand feeling hopelessly attracted to him! I know if I met him in a bar I would chat to him... - Help

 

No.

 

Daddy issues.

 

Bigger NO.

 

I find it very worrisome that you don't seem all that concerned that he is married. I suggest checking out the Infidelity and OW/OM section for a harsh reality check on what happens to single women who have affairs with married men.

[VeronicaRoss]

People who are in positions of status and authority relish the adulation that comes with the role. I just assume that was a huge part of their drive in getting the credentials. And women like you are exactly what some of them hope for. It's an old story.

 

I think the real problem is how you're emotionally invested in 'winning' him from his wife. Something is up with you, go to a counselor and deal with it before you find another married authority figure to ruin lives.

 

Also do everyone a favor and get a female doctor.

 

And hey, you can always indulge in the doctor-patient porn out there!

[Maria92]

LOL - I'm not at all invested in "winning" him from his wife! That is a huge assumption. I feel a bond with him (yes probably due to some sort of emotional transference) and he is attractive - it is quite hard accepting this - BUT THAT IS THE CRUX OF THE MATTER. And it ends there. I am the product of a broken home and would never dream of interfering with someone else's relationship. I was simply looking for people to talk to who may possibly have felt similarly.

 

Secondly I do not have "daddy issues" - that is highly offensive.

Edited April 12, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator