GoreSP Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 So I rarely start threads on here. I gave my number to a guy yesterday (morning) and I have to say - I really hate the three day rule! Anyhow for the sake of conversation, how many of you use this as a 'rule' when you get someone's number? Go!
ctxinfl Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Never cause it isn't a rule. It's a pointless mind game. 3
carhill Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 I never did follow any 'communication rules' when dating, generally calling when I felt like it. Worked out with some, not with others. I generally wrote the results off to 'like'. Where there was little, there was little; where a lot, a lot. The specifics of the communication stuff didn't appear to have large influence. Back then, long before cell phones, I might call, set up a date for the following weekend, then head out for a weekend at the races and not call again until confirming the date later. For some women, that might have been inadequate, so we missed. With sufficient like, it worked out. Hence, in general, IMO, rules can be counter-productive to establishing a natural synergy of communication. 2
Author GoreSP Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 Oh I get that it isn't a 'rule'. Thing is if you give your number to someone (we haven't gone on a date yet...) I can't assume he had no plans and will automatically text or call the same day either...hence - three day rule lol
Arieswoman Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 how many of you use this as a 'rule' when you get someone's number? I never used to take guy's numbers so that doesn't apply I never asked for a guy's number and I never gave a guy my number if he didn't ask for it. My logic is that if the guy is interested he will make a provisional date or suggest something there and then. He will follow through in a day or so to confirm details. If he took my number and said he'd call I'd give him about a week to make contact, then write him off. Life is too short to be put on hold for someone who isn't that bothered about you. 1
carhill Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 From my perspective as a guy, no woman has ever called me to initiate a date; however, when meeting a lady, finding or sensing mutual interest and receiving her phone number, I generally called the next evening, again reflecting that this was before mobile phones and my own personal aversion at the time to leaving dating messages on answering machines. A potential date could occur at any time but my general feeling was I wished to get to know the lady better and that wouldn't happen without personal interaction so it took initiative on my part to get the ball rolling. No time like the present. Unknown how things went for the ladies. I only know about the dates I did go on. I didn't survey them as to 'how I did' 3
Author GoreSP Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 I never used to take guy's numbers so that doesn't apply I never asked for a guy's number and I never gave a guy my number if he didn't ask for it. My logic is that if the guy is interested he will make a provisional date or suggest something there and then. He will follow through in a day or so to confirm details. If he took my number and said he'd call I'd give him about a week to make contact, then write him off. Life is too short to be put on hold for someone who isn't that bothered about you. Oh, I agree. However, I'm of the 'get off you *ss and go get what you want' mentality. If I see a guy I like, he gets my number. Simple as that.
gaius Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 I'll usually try to call sometime I think she won't pick up if she gave me her number unsolicited. Just to be nice and say I called. If I asked for it then it can range between 5 seconds or weeks. Depending on her level of interest and other factors. I don't think I ever followed a hard day rule.
RedRobin Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 For some weird reason, I don't think I've ever kept track of how long it took. When I give out my number, it kind of goes out to the stratosphere like a little balloon... or the note in the bottle. If it comes back, awesome. If it doesn't, then I forget it. In terms of keeping interest going... I guess I have enough other stuff going on that I'm not really thinking about it. OTOH, I hate texts... THAT I remember. It is more likely that I will remember when guys take a proverbial text dump in my life without calling... for that reason, I just ignore all texts that proceed an actual phone call. .... and if he never calls as a result of me ignoring texts... oh wellsss... I always throw them a line when I give him my number and say "Feel free to give me a call sometime"... ....Did I say, "Hey, text me sometime". No. that is not what I said. 3
hasaquestion Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 If I get someone's number I always shoot them a text in a few hours. Something like "Hi _____, this is _____, it was nice meeting you today,(reference to our last conversation), (suggest date)" The "3 day rule" is stupid. Yes, women like men who are busy. But its so freaking transparent. If you want to be hard to get, get off the xbox and actually schedule your time into things. Be busy don't act busy. If she's interested, she'll say yes whether you text her after one day, two days, or three days. And if she's not, she'll reject you at whatever time of day or cycle of the moon she has to. As for texting rather than calling, the last time I called a girl to make first date plans was in High School. Its a generational thing. 1
Imajerk17 Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Well, I do have a 24-Hour Rule. As in I follow up WITHIN 24 hours of meeting the girl. Usually a text within a couple hours and then a phone call within a day. I've come to see that momentum is my friend, and that showing interest is the new Playing It Cool. 4
joystickd Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 I have never been a person for games. If you are interested in someone let them know. Manipulations tends to open you up for manipulation because you are so focused on getting this person to do what you want that you ignore signs that this person may be doing it to you too. 1
2.50 a gallon Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 It is called the game of love. It all depended on the situation. From a man's point of view, in general I learned that I could not appear to be too eager. However, should we have hit it off, yes I would call her first chance I got to pick up where we left off in our conversation. I should also add, that I did not get my current lady's number and address for well over two and half years after we met. And there was a whole year in between, that I had no idea where she lived. The rumor was true, she had moved out of town for awhile.
ASG Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Honestly I don't much care for the 3 day rule and I usually will not even wait for the guy to make first contact. I mean... it depends on how interested I am, but if I am really interested? I'll text first. Which is why I am constantly baffled when people post here complaining that some guy hasn't said anything yet. Why not contact him, then? Then sure, if he doesn't reply, move on. But why not shoot him a phone call or text instead of waiting for HIM to contact YOU?
Author GoreSP Posted April 11, 2014 Author Posted April 11, 2014 Honestly I don't much care for the 3 day rule and I usually will not even wait for the guy to make first contact. I mean... it depends on how interested I am, but if I am really interested? I'll text first. Which is why I am constantly baffled when people post here complaining that some guy hasn't said anything yet. Why not contact him, then? Then sure, if he doesn't reply, move on. But why not shoot him a phone call or text instead of waiting for HIM to contact YOU? Oh I totally would! But this time, I decided to try something different since my oh so direct approach doesn't seem to be working lately. Therefore, he has my number. I don't have his... He got my number Wednesday morning. I gave him benefit of the doubt for Wednesday and Thursday, cause, you know, obviously he could be busy but it's the week end now. I can't think of a lot of reasons why he wouldn't text me tonight or tomorrow... So there. Only two more days of this sh*t I'm never doing this again. lol
ASG Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Oh I totally would! But this time, I decided to try something different since my oh so direct approach doesn't seem to be working lately. Therefore, he has my number. I don't have his... He got my number Wednesday morning. I gave him benefit of the doubt for Wednesday and Thursday, cause, you know, obviously he could be busy but it's the week end now. I can't think of a lot of reasons why he wouldn't text me tonight or tomorrow... So there. Only two more days of this sh*t I'm never doing this again. lol Ahh... I'm a bit of a control freak. Him having my number and me not having his would send me into a full on freak out! Can't be dealing with that! I need to have the option of taking the reigns! I'm a 21st century woman dammit!! :P
Author GoreSP Posted April 11, 2014 Author Posted April 11, 2014 I'll get back to you on this in two days haha! Ten characters
Author GoreSP Posted April 11, 2014 Author Posted April 11, 2014 Ahh... I'm a bit of a control freak. Him having my number and me not having his would send me into a full on freak out! Can't be dealing with that! I need to have the option of taking the reigns! I'm a 21st century woman dammit!! :P Yeah I'm exactly like you - hence me never doing things this way again.
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