Is she "playing hard to get"?

[azerty]

Hi everyone,

 

First I want to apologize for this lengthy *rant*

 

Well I usually don’t write this kind of thing online, but I really want to know what other people thing. So I “met” this girl several months ago when I was visiting some friends for the first time at a college about 1.5 hour away from where I live. That first night we started at a bar, drinking and just having a good time, when I noticed this gorgeous girl. I didn’t think much of it and I had no intention of pursuing here that night. Although we couldn’t really stop staring at each other. On top of that there was this other girl all over me. So after the bar we headed to my friends’ house where they were having a party; it turned out that the girl knew my friends and goes to the same school. We kept looking at each other, but I was having so much fun with my friends and did not approach her.

 

About 2-3 weeks later I went back for another visit and I met here again at my friends’ place. And more stares; again as usual I was just having fun, drinking, socializing and all the good stuff. Toward the end of the night, I don’t remember how it happened, we had a brief conversation and we shared some of our backgrounds (that’s when I set myself up to pursue her). She was nice, beautiful, smart, and well spoken. Again, for some reason, before I realized again I was just hanging out with my friends and she was gone (I probably followed my friends somewhere a bit more private in the house where we were all still drinking and talking).

 

After that weekend, I saw a picture of her and my friend from that night so I added her on facebook. We talked for a bit, but nothing really serious. Just random, brief messages (and of course I will text more than her lol). We will occasionally see each other at the same house, stares and smiles as usual. Then one day I asked her for the phone number and she ignored the message. A week later I messaged her again and apologized if I had offended her in any way. She replied nicely and said I didn’t offend her, and that she just isn’t comfortable sharing her phone number because she doesn’t know me well yet (it makes sense!). A week later I visited the same friends again and this time I didn’t see her (She had already started to grow on me lol). So after that weekend I told her I didn’t see her last time and she said it sucks and that I should let her know next time I come visit so we can get to know each other.

 

I did two weeks later, via another facebook message. The message only said I will be visiting on the weekend. On Saturday I visited and I didn’t see her. When I mentioned it, she told me she was there. Well it turned out that she was there on Friday instead on Saturday. So I apologized and she ignored (as she usually does lol). One other night I saw and I just walked to her, handed her my phone and asked her to enter her number. Which she refused all smiling and stuff. I told me I was being bold! (it was true, and I was kind of intoxicated). Again I apologized and she said there was no need for it. We talked, and as we were socializing with others, I had my arm wrap around her neck/shoulders and she was holding me by the waist (we still never had the chance to get to know each other).

 

So…my I want to know if she is playing “hard to get” or she is not just interested (which is fine if she isn’t). This occurred to me when my friend from the same school mentioned it and said I should get another girl “to play the game” (honestly it’s not my style).

 

NOW, what I think it’s the tricky part. I asked her out one time and told her how I feel. She said she is truly flattered, BUT she is “kind of seeing this guy. It’s not serious yet”, but she doesn’t want to that to him. She apologized for the time she told me I was being bold. And she hopes we will still be friends. Of course, I played it cool (why get upset, really). I have seen here many times again and it’s just stares, smiles, and as always brief conversations. Last time we couldn’t stop looking at each other. Before I left that night I kissed her at the neck/shoulder and she just smiled. I told her in a playful way that I don’t want her phone number anymore and she just laughed. Then I said I want to get to know her, she asked me to message her. That was on a Saturday, so on Tuesday I sent her a message (just a stupid how are you. LOL yeah I know it’s so lame). The thing is…she ignored it!

 

So is she just playing or she is not interested or she really has a guy she is kind of seeing? I know some people will say move on, and stuff. I am fine with it. I just never had to chase girls like this before so it’s kind of fun, but yet frustrating. And the truth is…Man I really like this girl haha.

 

Thanks,

Edited April 9, 2014 by azerty

[slizl]

100% not into you. You have made a ton of advances and she politely rejects you every time. If she was into you, she would be more responsive and would have given you her number.

[ExpatInItaly]

She's not really interested. I think she likes the attention you give her when you see each other, but that's it. It genuinely does sound as though she's seeing someone else (and I was actually already guessing that while reading your post, before I reached the part where you mentioned she'd told you this) I wouldn't pursue this; she's not playing hard-to-get. She's trying to drop you subtle hints that it's not going to happen.

[azerty]

Haha thanks guys! as I said, I just needed to know. Now time for the next one.

 

Oh, and thanks for reading that long post lol

Edited April 9, 2014 by azerty

[ktya]

My initial read - chick isnt really into you as much as you thought she was. Maybe seeing the other girl all over you turned her off but she thought you were cute.

 

You have two options:

 

1. Go find another girl

2. Keep asking for her number to see if she's interested, but maybe do it when you're not drunk

[azerty]

I don't give her much attention really. I'm usually having fun with friends and meeting people. And when I share some words with her it's brief and I usually just walk off to do something else.