maybeimtheone Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 she gave no reason. she just said she isn't ready to commit, and that i shouldn't take it personally but how do i not? i told her we could take it slow but it didnt matter i just wish i knew what was so wrong about me
faithfully Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 she gave no reason. she just said she isn't ready to commit, and that i shouldn't take it personally but how do i not? i told her we could take it slow but it didnt matter i just wish i knew what was so wrong about me she just said she isn't ready to commit, and that i shouldn't take it personally- that's your reason. people don't just break up like that, they tell you something and that was her reason to you. Just go NC and heal, something you can do/say will bring her back. There is nothing wrong with you- just because 1 person doesn't want to commit to you doesn't mean its you. there are billions of people in this world that would commit to you so you cant let 1 person ruin your life thinking there is something wrong with you. Her loss anyways.
Brutus Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 I know it hurts not to understand why all that happened. It was the same with my breakup. I had the (bad?) idea to see her 1 month later, and she could not give me any reasons/gave inconsistent reasons. Often the person who leaves you does not really know what went wrong with her own feelings. Or she may not want to hurt you (even more). Or she may give you reasons which are just excuses that she made up in her mind to explain to herself why she decided to leave. In any case, asking does not necessarily lead to the answers. Do not think that the fault is only yours. If a relationship ends, more often than not it is both sides' fault.
Confusedbylove Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 she gave no reason. she just said she isn't ready to commit, and that i shouldn't take it personally but how do i not? i told her we could take it slow but it didnt matter i just wish i knew what was so wrong about me You'll never know dude. It sucks but she has to protect herself. When you are dumped, you've been given an opportunity to figure it out for yourself. Do it. Definitely start doing NC, as tough as it may be you need to do it for yourself.
somedude81 Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 Yes it really sucks not knowing or not being able to understand why somebody dumped you. Unfortunately trying to ask them to explain themselves has a tendency to push them further away. The might actually wish to cut all contact with you, and block your from everything. I found this out through personal experience.
bluegreen Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Dumpers in most cases are cowards so they use text bull **** lines 5 year old would not buy lie and hide reasons do anything and everything not to end up feeling and being bad guy. What a joke cause by the time break up comes they thought done and said things that would make them exactly that and worse so in this case its not you its me is perfect example. She is ready in about 80 % sure way to commit to someone else just not you. Now few people here got this right it is not you its HER and that someone next just might take a c... from her you did not. One reason or it could be 1000 others who cares whats important her flaky ass is someone's else's problem now and not yours mourn cry if you need be sad then let it be and use NC. In few weeks you will start feeling better in few months she will be what was her face again stranger.
TiredFamilyGuy Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Those were OK words to break up with. What they mean is "I don't think you are the right one for me." You can understand why that one doesn't get said: because it seems like you have been judged and found wanting, when it's more that it's a mismatch from her POV. I don't agree that dumpers are cowards. It's hard to do. It's better than stringing someone along for years until you get bored or someone better comes along. Dude, sorry for your loss, but live and learn and Move On. 1
Ordinaryday Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 she just said she isn't ready to commit, and that i shouldn't take it personally that is JUST A LINE dumpers use. what it often means is "I am ready to commit to a relationship... but not with you". just forget about her and move onto the next one. 1
bluegreen Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Most of them "most of them" of course not every one and we all once dumped someone to in more or less mature way ...
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