James9912 Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 Here it is - if you read this whole thing I thank you. Was with my girlfriend for 2.5 years and then we broke up. Closest she'd been with anyone and I was very close to her family. We went through both long distance and living in close proximity. Her main reason of splitting was a little jealousy of having my own group of friends, and finding her own path, exploring. Something she always wanted to do, she didn't have too many friends at the time. After we broke up, it was tough on me to say the least. We met a few times after for lunch, I hid it at first and then at one point she said she missed me only to say sorry because she didnt want to complicate things. We met a few more times after that as she wanted to hang out and see me before she moved away. It was easy to tell how much it hurt her to see how I felt, definitely cared. A months later I called and let her know I was doing better, wished her the best and said a couple send off things as my final thoughts. I then went to straight NC for a good 6 months. During the 6 months, she would like certain things on Facebook, and texted me a few times around my birthday as well. And then a few more Facebook interactions, snapchats etc... Even some of her family texted me how I was doing. As hard as I was pushing to try and move on it seemed like everytime I tried to move on an out of the blue reminder came through, like something out of the ordinary it seemed. Like very strange, cosmic. One day I just listened to my gut and texted her, a just a simple hey, how are things, how have you been, its been awhile kind of thing. And she responded saying she actually was just thinking about reaching out to me and even offered to help with this side thing I've been working on that I just told her about. A few days went by and then she texted me out of the blue if I still needed help. We texted a bit to try a find a good time and I just kind of stopped following up as it hurt a bit. Then a few weeks went by and I get a random text about her wanting to say hello and she was supporting our school that we are big fans of. Exchange a text or two. Fast forward another week and I randomly text her and she lets me know she's landing in the airport of my hometown as a connection flight. Oddly enough I'm flying there at the exact same time. So we meet up for an hour and a drink catch up a bit and are cut short by her losing her wallet on the plane. I help as best I can to calm the situation and give her some spare cash and then she's on her way to her next flight. We text a bit more, I make her laugh, and she thanks me for helping and said it was nice seeing me. She lives several states away now and we plan on connecting over the next week on this side project over the phone but I wanted to know if you thought there still is a chance for us? I have no doubts we will always care for eachother in one way or another. But is this something I should persue? I miss her, I do, and have made many improvements on myself since we split. Through our relationship we both lost sight of who we really were and just being ourselves was all that was needed. Have that feeling she was the one and all these weird signs of us connecting seem to occur. Having her so far away I think is an obstacle to get her back too. On here for thoughts. Do I share my true thoughts on how I miss her? Keep casual connection? Move on? Feel a little lost here...
Author James9912 Posted April 9, 2014 Author Posted April 9, 2014 Gut feeling is to let her know how I feel it the best way possible to ad least do justice to myself to know I tried. I think her feeling is, well prior to this, she was hesitant to reach out because she thought I had an all or nothing attitude in terms of contact. The 3rd option is to just carry on and pretty much have NC. The hardest things is not being able to share certain things I know she would like, or make her laugh. I'm working on it but I still have that pain in my heart, it comes and goes but seems to always make itself known...
mangetout Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 Tell her how you feel James. I personally think you both had enough space from each other to grow personally. If she is is still hesitant/not sure them go NC immediately. But at least you know
Author James9912 Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 When we do talk next the last thing I would want to do is pressure her. More of a just a casual conversation on how things have been falling into place, and been doing well but seems like something is missing and I miss her. Also would say it was nice catching up and if she didn't live so far away I'd say we do that again some time. When we talk about this side project thing I also don't want to bring it up at the end as if I 'tricked' her into talking about something she didn't want to/wasn't ready for. But if she asks how I'm doing again, that would probably be the time.
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