Chi townD Posted April 9, 2014 Posted April 9, 2014 LMAO!!! Wow! DUDE! You're awesome! I've said it before. A LOT of girls hate the fact that there might be a person on this planet that doesn't think they're a nice person or someone could hate them. It drives them nuts. And with her text she sent you, that's EXACTLY what's going through her head. But, what I found funny is a while back, you were a big pile of blubbering goo; trying to get your Ex back. You applied NC and now look at you! Standing on your own two feet and offended that she even tried to contact you! Bravo, dude!!! Your progress brings a tear to my eye....*sniff* *sniff* Here's the thing. If it was THAT important, then she knows exactly where you live. Nothing is stopping her from driving on over there and knocking on your door. 4
Trovador Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Nothing is stopping her from driving on over there and knocking on your door. Don't give her any ideas... j/k Thanks Jogger123 for sharing your strength with us... 1
lauri Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 I blocked her number. I'm just so offend by the fact that she would reach out to me. I will NOT be an option. BTW she isn't pregnant. Thank you for the support. Amazing man!!! You will find someone who will defiantly not play these games and try to string you along. You're way stronger then I would have been in your situation - you did amazing. Keep it up. 2
Author Jogger123 Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 Amazing man!!! You will find someone who will defiantly not play these games and try to string you along. You're way stronger then I would have been in your situation - you did amazing. Keep it up. Thanks! It wasn't easy though. Temptation was there, but I had to forcefully make myself do it.
BC1980 Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Thanks! It wasn't easy though. Temptation was there, but I had to forcefully make myself do it. I think blocking is best because you can talk yourself into almost anything. At some point, I decided to put my emotional well being first and stopped responding to my ex. It was so hard, but it's made me stronger and built my self esteem over time.
FloridaKeys Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 How do you know she wasn't pregnant? Did you two communicate after the original text?
Author Jogger123 Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 How do you know she wasn't pregnant? Did you two communicate after the original text? I dunno maybe because we've never had sex... 3
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 I dunno maybe because we've never had sex... Hahaha I dont know why, but I laughed at this post. 3
Author Jogger123 Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 Hahaha I dont know why, but I laughed at this post. :lmao:
AtTheStart Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 See just for devil's advocate sake. I'd have replied a couple days later now, "Oh hey there....things?" Then if she unloads, "oh things are going well..." in any sense then you say, "Im sorry things aren't going well for you. But that's not me anymore remember?" If she unloads, "I've made a mistake, I want you back." Then here's what you say, "Well I'd love to see you, when are you free to get together?" Then if she sets a day, tell her to "bring over a bottle of wine or something, we'll make dinner together." This makes it clear you're not going to be her f*cking friend, Bottom line is this girl is not relationship material. You could listen to her but don't reveal sh*t about how you feel. In fact dissuade any conversation about the former relationship. Just act as if it didn't happen. She's not trustworthy, loyal, and completely lacks integrity. You don't want that in a girlfriend or relationship. Sure she could be a nice f* buddy or friends with benefits. But not a friend or girlfriend. If you get together, the whole time you should be seducing her. Hungry eyes. If she brings up stuff about her new relationship, your old relationship, you don't care!!! (it doesn't effect you anymore, you couldn't care less) and you say this, "Baby I don't care about any of that. Why don't you bring those sexy lips over here and kiss me." Hungry Eyes my friend.
Author Jogger123 Posted April 10, 2014 Author Posted April 10, 2014 See just for devil's advocate sake. I'd have replied a couple days later now, "Oh hey there....things?" Then if she unloads, "oh things are going well..." in any sense then you say, "Im sorry things aren't going well for you. But that's not me anymore remember?" If she unloads, "I've made a mistake, I want you back." Then here's what you say, "Well I'd love to see you, when are you free to get together?" Then if she sets a day, tell her to "bring over a bottle of wine or something, we'll make dinner together." This makes it clear you're not going to be her f*cking friend, Bottom line is this girl is not relationship material. You could listen to her but don't reveal sh*t about how you feel. In fact dissuade any conversation about the former relationship. Just act as if it didn't happen. She's not trustworthy, loyal, and completely lacks integrity. You don't want that in a girlfriend or relationship. Sure she could be a nice f* buddy or friends with benefits. But not a friend or girlfriend. If you get together, the whole time you should be seducing her. Hungry eyes. If she brings up stuff about her new relationship, your old relationship, you don't care!!! (it doesn't effect you anymore, you couldn't care less) and you say this, "Baby I don't care about any of that. Why don't you bring those sexy lips over here and kiss me." Hungry Eyes my friend. You just totally confused me...
AtTheStart Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 Ok, whoops. Lately I've been totally miswriting words for some reason. I meant if she contacts saying, "things ARENT going good" like she wants you to be her emotional support then forget that. And gently remind...you'd didn't want me for that anymore. You didn't want me for anything (well don't say that but that's what you should think/realize). IF she says, "I made a mistake..." and goes into it IN DEPTHLY..... then there's a chance for an all new well not reconciliation but "dynamic" to knowing her. Does that help clarify, sorry if I confused. I just think while it's good to heal...going cold shoulder is deserved but also screams, "Im weak, and just need to not hear from you to heal." You're ****ing strong my man! Exude confidence, focus on the pageantry, and get to where you're happy with you....and can deal with people in and out of your life.... because you have a lot of them you're ready to welcome. Remember that you have a lot of love to give, to the world and to someone!!!! Still, everything I wrote above is what i'd suggest. 1
Simon Phoenix Posted April 10, 2014 Posted April 10, 2014 See just for devil's advocate sake. I'd have replied a couple days later now, "Oh hey there....things?" Then if she unloads, "oh things are going well..." in any sense then you say, "Im sorry things aren't going well for you. But that's not me anymore remember?" If she unloads, "I've made a mistake, I want you back." Then here's what you say, "Well I'd love to see you, when are you free to get together?" Then if she sets a day, tell her to "bring over a bottle of wine or something, we'll make dinner together." This makes it clear you're not going to be her f*cking friend, Bottom line is this girl is not relationship material. You could listen to her but don't reveal sh*t about how you feel. In fact dissuade any conversation about the former relationship. Just act as if it didn't happen. She's not trustworthy, loyal, and completely lacks integrity. You don't want that in a girlfriend or relationship. Sure she could be a nice f* buddy or friends with benefits. But not a friend or girlfriend. If you get together, the whole time you should be seducing her. Hungry eyes. If she brings up stuff about her new relationship, your old relationship, you don't care!!! (it doesn't effect you anymore, you couldn't care less) and you say this, "Baby I don't care about any of that. Why don't you bring those sexy lips over here and kiss me." Hungry Eyes my friend. Yeah, this is playing with fire. I would not advocate this at all. I don't think the OP is in the state to play these type of games.
lauri Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Yeah, this is playing with fire. I would not advocate this at all. I don't think the OP is in the state to play these type of games. Agreed...I don't think anyone should have to play games anyways. If you are playing games then you are most likely in the wrong situation in the first place!!! You don't need to go down this path at all...if you do you open up the door for her to start playing with your emotions. There is nothing more to say or do regarding your ex. All you need to do now is find an even sexier, smarter, cooler girl who is more compatible with you. There is no reason for you to believe you can't...I mean look at the strength you had to block your ex and move forward. I have no doubt you will be able to find someone way better then your ex.
AtTheStart Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Now hold on! I said nothing about playing games!! Of course my suggestion might be cutting edge but OP should not be opening his emotions up...I specifically stated such! You absolutely should be finding a smarter, sexier, and more attractive girl, and another, and then another. 2 or 3, 3 or 4! Gotta sort through what's personally a "no" for YOU when it comes to a girl for a relationship to get to the "YES'S" OP, you need an abundance mentality...many girls will love you...and there are some that will never let you go! Then there will be one...who is perfect (ups & downs, good or bad...it will be perfect). When you argue you'll make up perfectly, when you make her smile your soul will smile perfectly, she will make YOUR soul smile!!! The littlest of appreciations will be noticed. The HJs will be plenty & hot. And your love will honestly be beautiful. It'll take this experience and growing from it to get you there! You need to get there though... so you need to move on and heal from this. Until then, it's possible to consider alternative modalities! I had a GF with mental issues...and she still decided that her life would be better without me in it...and I was one of the "way too nice, supportive, we got way too comfortable" types. So we all have to learn from what happens. Whatever happened to everyone on this board...it had to happen so we will heal and be ready to accept the true love of our lives! (even if it may be a grown version of an ex, the grown version of you might / should want more!)
Simon Phoenix Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Now hold on! I said nothing about playing games!! Of course my suggestion might be cutting edge but OP should not be opening his emotions up...I specifically stated such! You absolutely should be finding a smarter, sexier, and more attractive girl, and another, and then another. 2 or 3, 3 or 4! Gotta sort through what's personally a "no" for YOU when it comes to a girl for a relationship to get to the "YES'S" OP, you need an abundance mentality...many girls will love you...and there are some that will never let you go! Then there will be one...who is perfect (ups & downs, good or bad...it will be perfect). When you argue you'll make up perfectly, when you make her smile your soul will smile perfectly, she will make YOUR soul smile!!! The littlest of appreciations will be noticed. The HJs will be plenty & hot. And your love will honestly be beautiful. It'll take this experience and growing from it to get you there! You need to get there though... so you need to move on and heal from this. Until then, it's possible to consider alternative modalities! I had a GF with mental issues...and she still decided that her life would be better without me in it...and I was one of the "way too nice, supportive, we got way too comfortable" types. So we all have to learn from what happens. Whatever happened to everyone on this board...it had to happen so we will heal and be ready to accept the true love of our lives! (even if it may be a grown version of an ex, the grown version of you might / should want more!) He's much better off just not acknowledging her. Keeping it simple is better right now -- no need to reinvent the wheel.
Jiivy Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Have you ever been inclined to contact her since December? I'm not asking if you followed through...just asking if it ever tempted you? I've had a couple of lapses with my ex fiancée and it's been just over a month. The point is...what did you feel after the urge to message them passed? Relief? Guilt? What I'm saying is that sometimes when we reach out, as the dumper or the dumpee...it's not a choice that we make with long consideration. It's a passionate thing, an itch to scratch because we're missing that person deeply. My ex left me for some guy she invited round just a few days after kicking me to the curb...yet still she reached out. I don't think anything less than some sign of persistence from your ex's side is going to give you anything reasonable. Her one-off message is a cry of emotion. Just as mine were to her, despite the fact I knew she was walking away with some other guy quite happily. Thats my opinion. Ultimately it's entire your decision how you handle this, I would simply say that a one-off message isn't likely to "mean" much other than the fact that she's struggling with something. It could be guilt, it could be feelings of reconciliation, it could be just her ego.
Recommended Posts