ediebrick Posted April 6, 2014 Posted April 6, 2014 (edited) Just looking for some clarity, if there is any to be found: I was in school for 13 years, so I feel like I'm trying to beat the biological clock : ( I moved from Seattle to El Paso, Texas (a border town) after my fellowship. I met a guy who lives half time in Mexico (because he coaches some high school teams there and is a photographer) and helps his parents in El Paso. He is a Mexican national and is very, very poor. Thus, when he goes to MX, he really can't afford to text or call me (he doesn't have internet or Wi FI on his phone) and, if I try to call him, it uses his cell minutes which he cannot afford to replace Despite his being really poor, he always tries to pay for our dates. However, I step in half the time and pay because I earn a great deal more and don't want to burden him financially. 3 of our dates have been out, one he watched a movie at our house. For one date, I went to Ciudad Juarez because I was so desperate to see him more. I saw first hand how poor he was, so I know my inferences are correct. One thing I like about him, is that although he is affectionate (holds my hand, kisses), he honors my wishes that I won't have sex until I am committed and has never even tested the limits, lol Well, we were dating for 4-5 weeks, and I decided that texting a couple of times a week (when he was in the USA) and one date/week was moving a little slow. He doesn't like to talk on the phone bc his English is a little shaky, but I called anyway and said that although i definitely wasn't looking to rush into a relationship, i did't think the amount we were talking right now would ever lead to anything. I then said maybe I could help us find a way to talk while he was in CIudad Juarez (I was hoping he would get the hint that I wanted to buy him a phone card/minutes but he didn't get it) He proceeded to tell me that he would be in San Diego all next week and would have "all his time for me." I then said I don't want all his time but we need to figure out a way to at least text while he is Mexico and I reiterated that I *eventually* wanted a boyfriend but wanted to move slow and get to know people He then said he wanted a relationship eventually, too, but right now didn't have time. I guess I kind of feel that he is sending mixed messages. He took me out on dates, paid despite being very very poor, was affectionate, would text me the second he had internet access, and then told me he would have all his time for me next week (and after July he would have more time, too) and then said he didn't have time for a serious relationship?? I then said we could continue to date slowly and see where it goes....Doesn't that sound very mixed? TBH, he isn't the best looking guy in the world nor the best educated, but I really like the fact that he likes to do more than go out to eat. He loves to garden, he loves kids, he coaches cheerleading teams, he reads a lot. Edited April 6, 2014 by ediebrick
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