Same Relationships Over and Over Again

[firsttracks]

I'm seriously thinking of seeing a therapist to talk about this. I keep falling for women who are no good for me. I'm starting to think I'm codependent and exploring that. I don't want to change or have to take care of someone but I do feel good about myself when the girl I'm dating's car won't start and calls me to come and jump start it. It's not just dating I do that for friends too because I like when people do that for me.

 

The type of girl I'm attracted to by default is outgoing, flighty, adventurous, usually has some issues and baggage, is extremely selfish, has had lots of partners and an ex who is always the bad guy, possible history of drug use, and still likes to have fun and party. This is no good for me, I know that but I'm so attracted to it. I know I deserve better.

 

I want someone who's equally as fun, spontaneous, and outgoing minus all the negatives. I want someone reliable I can call in a pinch, someone excited to see me, someone I don't have to worry about going out and sleeping with someone who wooed her. I know I'm the man and I am very masculine but I'm also very sensitive. I need someone who can deal with that. Most women I meet can't. They mistake my sensitivity for being soft or a push over. I need someone I can be a rock for but who can also be a rock for me. I'm a guy, I have it together 6 days out of the week but once in a while I need to be able to talk to my partner about a personal issue without her losing all attraction because it makes me look weak to admit I have feelings and problems too.

 

I just haven't found someone like that. I think every person I'm dating brings me closer to that but sometimes I ignore the prize and keep spending time with someone I'm attracted to but is no good for me either because I'm lonely, the sex is amazing, or we just have fun together but I know it's not going to last or end well.

[soccerrprp]

Good idea to consider seeing a therapist. It sounds like co-dependency.