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Can't cope when things don't work out


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Posted

Hi, don't know if I've put this in the right section, so sorry if it's not. I just saw 'coping', although it's not a particular break up I'm struggling with, it's all. I know that that sounds obvious, I but mean ALL. As in, even if we've only seen each other a few times.

 

Basically, I don't like people very often. It's not that I don't have people who are interested. I don't know how to say this without sounding big headed, but there are quite a few people who have been showing interest since they found out I'm now single (I sound really full of myself now, but I'm honestly not. It's just true at the moment). But I'm just very very picky and it takes a lot for someone to get me interested. But that just mean that when I eventually do give someone a chance, it's because I really like them. But because of this, I think I care too much about the situation, so when things don't work out, I end up feeling really down about it.

 

It sounds obvious to be a bit down when things don't work out, but I'm down to a point where it's disrupting my day and stopping me doing things like work as I feel like I actually can't get it out of my head.

 

So I'm just wondering, how do I stop letting these things control me? It's getting to a point now where I'm thinking I'm never going to be able to be with someone as if it doesn't work out, I can't cope with it. Do people usually feel this down when they really like someone? Or do I need help? Thanks

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Posted

When you find yourself having these overwhelming thoughts, you stop & acknowledge them. Then you make a point to tell yourself that you can't think like this. Things will get better but right now you have responsibilities. Then you redirect yourself back to the task at hand.

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Posted

I'm exactly the same (Picky per se), had the same thing happen to me (Dumped by the one I opened up too) and pretty much going through the same thing post break up (Cannot stop thinking about her and the heartache almost becoming incapacitating).

 

Suppose it's just a time thing (Or I hope anyway).

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