Vanilla_Tinkie Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 Last night I met my first love after 6 years of NC and we have been messaging back and forth for the past month but no flirting whatsoever. Last night I think I might have overstepped the boundary as I went in for a kiss to which he smiled and pulled his face away, which left me majorly confused He has been awfully quiet today and I am too damn scared to message him now, but what confuses me the most is why would he ask the owner if he could make me a cappuccino with a heart on top and not expect a kiss?
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 Oh boy. Should have left this one sleeping where it has been, successfully, for so long...
Author Vanilla_Tinkie Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 Oh boy. Should have left this one sleeping where it has been, successfully, for so long... Yup and the fact that I am falling head over heels again for this man is not helping at all:(
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 Yup and the fact that I am falling head over heels again for this man is not helping at all:( This has disaster written all over it. Please take a step back and examine this carefully. Who broke up with who in the beginning? Under what circumstances?? 1
Author Vanilla_Tinkie Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 This has disaster written all over it. Please take a step back and examine this carefully. Who broke up with who in the beginning? Under what circumstances?? It was a mutual breakup as he had to attend to his sick father in Sweden and the both of us felt that a long distance relationship would not have been sustainable in the long run.
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 OK. Time to be completely open and transparent about what exactly is going on. What are your expectations? Just trying to read into vague and ambiguous actions will simply not work. Time for direct communication!!!
Author Vanilla_Tinkie Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 OK. Time to be completely open and transparent about what exactly is going on. What are your expectations? Just trying to read into vague and ambiguous actions will simply not work. Time for direct communication!!! I want us to try again and see if what we had was always meant to be. Do I just tell him that I want to try again and see where it goes? Won't that scare men off?
mtnbiker3000 Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 I want us to try again and see if what we had was always meant to be. Do I just tell him that I want to try again and see where it goes? Won't that scare men off? This is what I would do. It won't scare him off if it's what he wants too. And if not, then that's the risk you have to take. Better than all of this 'what does it mean?', 'what is he trying to say?' crap... Maybe go out again casually and try to get a feel for his intentions before sticking your ovaries out...
lauri Posted April 4, 2014 Posted April 4, 2014 I want us to try again and see if what we had was always meant to be. Do I just tell him that I want to try again and see where it goes? Won't that scare men off? I'll be straight with you here - I think you need to be open and transparent with him. But, to be honest, after 6 years of NC, I think going in for the kiss that is a little bit too early. The attraction can build between the two of you if you take things slow and don't rush things. If you try to push him into a relationship / dating you now he may be scared and back off because he may think he does not even know you anymore. You could tell him you are interested in him and would love to see him for another date, but I wouldn't talk about a relationship yet. Only time will tell if he is interested but do not invest too much into this too early. You got to realize that this is going to most likely be like WHOLE new person (6 years is a long time) and you are going to need to go through the entire process from scratch again. 1
Author Vanilla_Tinkie Posted April 4, 2014 Author Posted April 4, 2014 I'll be straight with you here - I think you need to be open and transparent with him. But, to be honest, after 6 years of NC, I think going in for the kiss that is a little bit too early. The attraction can build between the two of you if you take things slow and don't rush things. If you try to push him into a relationship / dating you now he may be scared and back off because he may think he does not even know you anymore. You could tell him you are interested in him and would love to see him for another date, but I wouldn't talk about a relationship yet. Only time will tell if he is interested but do not invest too much into this too early. You got to realize that this is going to most likely be like WHOLE new person (6 years is a long time) and you are going to need to go through the entire process from scratch again. You are right and I completely lost myself in that moment when I went in for the kiss, it is difficult to start afresh with all these memories hanging around. I will send him a message and apologize for my behavior and hope that he still wants to spend more time with me in the near future.
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