Overusedphrase Posted April 3, 2014 Posted April 3, 2014 Didn't know what to title this...Im just so damn frustrated right now >_< UGH. So we broke up last Friday because of arguments over exs, but realized we still cared and got back together on Monday. It was going amazing again, then I mentioned an old friend messaged me, whom I had on my friendslist still. I remembered that guy I flirted with near a year ago. My (now ex) bf goes off on me. Argued with me for 3 hours over my past men being around...men I absolutely do not care for. They're around here and there cuz I honestly just forget they exist x_x He kept saying how he's over everything with my past and all these guys. I don't flirt with anyone, im beyond loyal to him. I block people out my life just so he'll feel better. So I finally said I had enough and its over. He really went off on me...called me a whore and told me he hated me. That he wont come back this time and f*ck off..saying im just like the last girl he fell for yeaaaars ago and he doesn't wanna feel again.. I don't understand why he'll allow the little things to break up a good relationship. We do get along well, but as soon as I mention the past with a guy, he goes off. And these are guys from years ago. UGHHHHH I needed to vent this out.
saltyfishhead666 Posted April 3, 2014 Posted April 3, 2014 Didn't know what to title this...Im just so damn frustrated right now >_< UGH. So we broke up last Friday because of arguments over exs, but realized we still cared and got back together on Monday. It was going amazing again, then I mentioned an old friend messaged me, whom I had on my friendslist still. I remembered that guy I flirted with near a year ago. My (now ex) bf goes off on me. Argued with me for 3 hours over my past men being around...men I absolutely do not care for. They're around here and there cuz I honestly just forget they exist x_x He kept saying how he's over everything with my past and all these guys. I don't flirt with anyone, im beyond loyal to him. I block people out my life just so he'll feel better. So I finally said I had enough and its over. He really went off on me...called me a whore and told me he hated me. That he wont come back this time and f*ck off..saying im just like the last girl he fell for yeaaaars ago and he doesn't wanna feel again.. I don't understand why he'll allow the little things to break up a good relationship. We do get along well, but as soon as I mention the past with a guy, he goes off. And these are guys from years ago. UGHHHHH I needed to vent this out. Your ex is severely insecure. It's that simple.
SicklyWolf Posted April 3, 2014 Posted April 3, 2014 I understand your frustration, but I can understand where he is coming from too... I am/was him. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to defend him, but to let you know what he might be feeling. I was cheated on by my first love, and it really traumatized me. I did everything I could to make the relationship work, put in 100%, and things were going great. I found out she was cheating on me through a mutual acquaintance and long story short, it was a bad breakup and a long recovery time. Now, I have a hard time trusting my current GFs. Everything can be going well, but in the back of my mind, there is always that nagging thought that she could be cheating on me at that very moment. Certain things set it off more often. An ignored or late text reply, her being out late at night without letting me know ahead of time, a day she doesn't really feel like talking or engaging intimacy, .... Logically I understand these are all usual things in a healthy LTR, but those doubts are always there like a mental disease. I have a good job, attractive, I work out, have a great social life, cars, savings, dreams, well traveled, lots of hobbies, average penis size, average sexual skill. Overall, I should be happy with my life, and confident that I can make a girl happy. Overall, I am happy, and I have made my GFs happy, and they have no reason to ever want to cheat on me. I know this, and only my first GF cheated on me, no other. But again, this doubt needs no reason, no logic. My self-confidence, no matter how great, cannot always overcome that doubt 100% of the time. And when my confidence wavers just a little bit, that doubt is there, ready to throw my mind into turmoil. I have noticed that the more I'm emotionally invested (in love with) my GF, the more this doubt has power over me. Anyways, I need to get to work, thought I'd share my thoughts on this, so you can maybe understand him better. For my part, because this is such a big deal to me, I go out of my way to let my GF know that I will NEVER cheat on her, and that I would rather break up with her than to cheat. I report where I'm going whenever I go out, and check in often. It sometimes makes me wonder if I'm annoying the heck out of them though.
melell Posted April 3, 2014 Posted April 3, 2014 I agree with the above poster that it is not entirely the insecure persons fault- things lead to the insecurity. But in the same breath I 100% believe people need time alone to work through these problems, when you are in a relationship and behavior like you mentioned in your post is happen then it is a clear sign that the relationship is not healthy. In those circumstances I believe it is best to walk away, and in my observations it seems as though the insecurity seems to get worse rather than improve as the relationship progresses. Much as if acting/thinking that way becomes the 'norm'.
Author Overusedphrase Posted April 3, 2014 Author Posted April 3, 2014 Yeah...his first love ended badly with her leaving for another guy..he didn't feel for anyone all those years till he met me, "So he says". I've cut off many guys to keep him happy. I'm a gamer as well, so I have many guy friends. He just flips out on the ones that flirted with me or had history with. He came back early this week cuz he missed me. Then argues with me over something thats near a year old after having a great day together. I know it's very unhealthy...UGH idk if its the feelings talking >_< but should I just give him space or just f*ck off for good?
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