drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 In my experience I've found that acting 'normal' and mature really doesn't get you anywhere online. You have to be funny, you have to not care if the girl is going to message you back, and you have to be willing to get a little weird. For example; "Hey, how's it going? I miss soccer! Used to play in HS. Do you still play?" she's thinking: he's nice, i guess. maybe he'll take me out for ice cream sometime, watch a few Disney movies..eh I'll pass. vs. "HELLO KATIE MY NAME IS ANDREW MY CAT PUKED ON MY PHONE SO I CAN ONLY SEXT IN ALL CAPS IM SORRY I HOPE THIS DOSNT AFFECT ARE FRIENDSHIP HOPE 2 HERE FROM U SOON" She's thinking: haha omg wtf is this dudes problem? is he serious..he's kindof cute though. Sure, most girls still aren't going to message you back with the 2nd option..but a few may be intrigued, pissed or amused while message 1 just sounds lame to everyone. yes you might get more replies with the first message but the conversation is going to die, and it's going to die quick. ohh and if she fires back something like "fck off" ...never be intimidated. respond with something along the lines of "please don't use the fck word, it offends me." I'm in my early 20's. I realize this might not apply to all age groups but in my 3 month online dating career I've collected 5 phone numbers. Only one of those came from a conversation where I didn't act like a complete goofball. am I on to something? thoughts? 1
J21 Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Guess that depends what the individual is looking for. If its working for ya keep it up
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 I actually want to try this. I always right the first kind of message. Never gets me anywhere. I've always concluded it was because I was a loser. But now I know what I need to start doing...
PegNosePete Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Well I wouldn't really recommend it. In my experience the best type of message is somewhere in between these two examples. Yes make it fun and light and maybe a bit crazy but don't include so many grammar and spelling errors. And referencing sexting might not go down well. The best type of message I find is to write in another language, if their profile says they speak one. Pretty much always gets a reply even if you write "ciao, come stai?". 1
kodakgirl Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 But I liiiike the thought of a guy taking me out for ice cream then watching Disney movies! I disagree with your overall conclusion, but if that kind of message catches the kinds of girls you want, go for it. It certainly wouldn't catch me, but that probably means I'm not your type. I feel in OLD it's best to write the kind of profile and messages you feel would appeal to the kind of person you want, whatever kind of person that might be.
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 I actually want to try this. I always right the first kind of message. Never gets me anywhere. I've always concluded it was because I was a loser. But now I know what I need to start doing... Give it a shot man! it worked for me...just make sure you don't get too sexual. I'm still on the line about weather I should be using the word "sexting" You don't want to creep them out but at the same time you can't care what she thinks about you...she either digs it or she doesn't.
martaldn Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Well I wouldn't really recommend it. In my experience the best type of message is somewhere in between these two examples. Yes make it fun and light and maybe a bit crazy but don't include so many grammar and spelling errors. And referencing sexting might not go down well. The best type of message I find is to write in another language, if their profile says they speak one. Pretty much always gets a reply even if you write "ciao, come stai?". bene grazie
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 (edited) But I liiiike the thought of a guy taking me out for ice cream then watching Disney movies! I disagree with your overall conclusion, but if that kind of message catches the kinds of girls you want, go for it. It certainly wouldn't catch me, but that probably means I'm not your type. I feel in OLD it's best to write the kind of profile and messages you feel would appeal to the kind of person you want, whatever kind of person that might be. well no one will write me back when I try to talk about interests or hobbies..or they'll write me back once or twice and go away. "Hey, how's it going? I miss soccer! Used to play in HS. Do you still play?"...the problem with that...there's probably 100 guys behind you that are going to write the same thing and at least 10 or 20 of them are going to be just as attractive as you(if you're really lucky). It's boring and lame. Don't get me wrong..I love to watch movies and eat ice cream..but she doesn't need to know this haha Edited April 1, 2014 by drew232
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 OP, you're too absolute. Your first example is BOOOOOORING. And your second example is SCHIZOPHRENIC! You have to find a happy medium in between. You can be funny without sounding insane. 1
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 I dont want to big myself up here... BUT lol... I seem to have a pretty great response rate with OLD and the reason why I think this is is because I read their profiles then come up with something funny/stupid based on their profile and I think it gets their attention rather than the same old "hiya" etc. It really does work and it shows u have made the effort to read about them and show you have a good personality x 1
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 OP, you're too absolute. Your first example is BOOOOOORING. And your second example is SCHIZOPHRENIC! You have to find a happy medium in between. You can be funny without sounding insane. give me an example...
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Ive got an example.. a bloke had "I love cheese and cats!" on his profile so I messaged him "I love cheese and cats too... but only on wholemeal!" He said it really made him laugh lol x
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 Ive got an example.. a bloke had "I love cheese and cats!" on his profile so I messaged him "I love cheese and cats too... but only on wholemeal!" He said it really made him laugh lol x ehh idk haha
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 give me an example... If soccer is something she seems to show interest in, use it as your backbone and gussy it up with a joke. I like non-sequiturs too. But not to the extreme of the puking cat sexting thing. Though even that I can see that working with a few girls with weird senses of humor. But yeah, "I miss soccer. Do you still play" is yawn-inspiring. Gotta set yourself apart. I only did OLD for two weeks but I had a high response rate. And the replying to "fck off" thing... why would you even attempt to further communicate with someone that's such a bitch lol??
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 But yeah, "I miss soccer. Do you still play" is yawn-inspiring. Gotta set yourself apart. I only did OLD for two weeks but I had a high response rate. And the replying to "fck off" thing... why would you even attempt to further communicate with someone that's such a bitch lol?? No one in there right mind should be pissed off by something said online..if she replies I figure she wants to talk..I made it three dates once with a girl who told me to fck off after the first message. I see it more as she's playing to my level than her being a bitch BTW i think i found a happy medium..something like this; "HEY AMANDA! MY CAT PUKED ON MY PHONE SO I CAN ONLY TEXT IN ALL CAPS. I HOPE THAT'S OKAY."
organizedchaos Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 No one in there right mind should be pissed off by something said online..if she replies I figure she wants to talk..I made it three dates once with a girl who told me to fck off after the first message. I see it more as she's playing to my level than her being a bitch BTW i think i found a happy medium..something like this; "HEY AMANDA! MY CAT PUKED ON MY PHONE SO I CAN ONLY TEXT IN ALL CAPS. I HOPE THAT'S OKAY." I like it, funny.
slizl Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Unfortunately, all that matters is your pic and height. You have these two things, you can write anything and get a decent response rate. However, I do agree with the earlier poster that said the best message is a combination of both emails.
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 No one in there right mind should be pissed off by something said online..if she replies I figure she wants to talk..I made it three dates once with a girl who told me to fck off after the first message. I see it more as she's playing to my level than her being a bitch But she just writes "fck off"?
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Unfortunately, all that matters is your pic and height. You have these two things, you can write anything and get a decent response rate. However, I do agree with the earlier poster that said the best message is a combination of both emails. Totally disagree.. I've had a gorgeous bloke message me & he was so boring I stopped replying x 1
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 But you still replied.... yeah but the dialog always dies after 3 or 4 exchanges.. if you're going to be boring in your messages your pic is a waste of space
Author drew232 Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 But she just writes "fck off"? bottom line; she responded..if she wasn't moved by your message in anyway she just wouldn't reply. I'll take a "fck off' over silence any day haha
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 yeah but the dialog always dies after 3 or 4 exchanges.. if you're going to be boring in your messages your pic is a waste of space Pics can be invaluable as long as the girl has a streak of shallowness lol. I would message about who knows what and girls would sometimes just reply disregarding what I was saying and just say things about my pics. And the "fck off" thing reminds me of another important thing in dating - persistence. It really can pay off. But the girl must like you at least a little from the onset for that to work.
Hello_is_it_me Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 bottom line; she responded..if she wasn't moved by your message in anyway she just wouldn't reply. I'll take a "fck off' over silence any day haha Hmm.. yeah, I guess... I'm totally for feisty banter and my gf calls me a "sarcastic *******" at times but the whole "fck off" thing still makes me scratch my head. Sounds like the girl either sucks at communication or is bipolar if this is how she replies. Who knows. Maybe I'm just getting old (32) and don't know what the kids are up to now..
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