billz Posted March 30, 2014 Posted March 30, 2014 (edited) Hello everyone, Here is my first post and it's about "a thing" that's been going on for almost 8 years now. Here it goes.. We met in the latter half of 2006 and were struck by each other almost immediately. Not many weeks had passed where I realized that she was a true soul mate. I've never felt as close to anyone as I did with her. Of course, the feelings were mutual and we were completely immersed. The thing was that I was away for college overseas and had to leave our home town. And there was a family friend of her's who she had known before me and had feelings for as well. But I wasn't too worried about that because I felt that what we had was made of fairy tales and couldn't be broken. I was wrong about that. We kept in touch on a daily basis with e-mails and chat and everything just kept getting better. The distance didn't interfere. I had an unshakeable faith in us which I believed she also shared. In time, I believe the distance got to her. As well as the fact that the other guy was in close proximity (geographically and because he was a family friend). At some point, she eventually made a decision that she would choose him over me. She hinted at our ethnic differences (we're of the same religion) with an example of one her friends who ended her relationship with a guy from another country (which I didn't agree with). Over the next several months, I was in a state of confusion. I didn't know what to do. She sent mixed messages which would completely throw me off. I found them distasteful and they made me very mad. I don't know if they were intentional or not. One day in the latter half of 2008, I get an international text message (I'm still overseas at this point) from her saying that she got engaged. She was so excited to tell me and for some reason had no idea that I would be absolutely broken at the news. I talked to friends I trusted about what had happened and they told me to forget her. It sounded easier said than done. I couldn't stop thinking about her. I couldn't comprehend what had happened. How could something so infinite end? Emotionally, I was absolutely run down. I told her what was going on in my mind and how I felt it wasn't fair. Eventually, her fiancé read her emails and found out what was going on. That's when we had to say our goodbyes. Depressing days followed. Days turned to months. I started seeing another girl at some point but that wasn't too significant. I didn't mean to write this much but I will try to finish it up now. From 2009 to 2012, we would randomly say hi every 7 or 8 months or so. Very brief conversations that didn't amount to much but for some reason they still meant the whole world to me. I can't seem to shake her off no matter how hard I tried. In 2010-2011, I tried letting go of all the things that held me back (her included) but that didn't work. It was actually the ****tiest time period of my life where I abandoned all I stood for. Thank God I returned to 'normal'. The point of this all is... Despite all that's happened, despite her getting married, and all the years in between, we still have such a deep connection that we just cannot move away from. Believe me, I've tried. She still sends me songs relating to us and recently told me to watch this movie called "Last Night" which is about lovers meeting again. I like to think I'm a logical guy who puts a lot of thought into things before getting into them. Everyone I've met since first meeting her has not been close to as interesting. But I can't explain what I have with her. I'm sure she can't either with me. She's just always there. Note: In case it matters.. Since her engagement, we have not met or talked on the phone. Just e-mails and chat. If anyone actually took the time to read all of this, would you be able to explain what is going on or what I should do? Am I (or we) a hopeless romantic? Are we just soul mates? Edited March 30, 2014 by billz
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