Author KaliLove Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 I'm back. Guess what? I'm not a complete mess! Sorry to disappoint Bluegreen and SIH. As expected, he said he loves me and misses me but that he still doesn't know what will happen in the future. I asked him if he was willing to do therapy and he said maybe (which probably means no). I told him I can't put my life on hold for him and that I'm not willing to give up on getting married and having a family. He was sad but he agreed that I shouldn't put my life on hold. I'm not going on the trip (luckily he can get his money back..I'm relieved about that). I didn't tell him to never call me again but he knows I'm serious about what I want and I think he'll respect that. We ended on a positive note. We do love each other very much but we just don't want the same things. I'm very glad I went, and I'm EXTREMELY glad I was mentally prepared before I did. I'm glad this didn't happen before now. I really am ok. I'm still seeing that other guy but I'm having some doubts about him. I'm not sure if I feel a spark. Moral of the story - don't break NC until you know you'll be ok no matter what. 1
bluegreen Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Gee golly I bet you are just heartbroken over disappointing me. But that's as much as am gonna say whatever your opinion is of me is your own choice. And thank the ever good Lord I was never the kind of person that wilted as flower if someone disliked me but am still "glad for you". Anyway back to the post ...
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 I'm back. Guess what? I'm not a complete mess! Sorry to disappoint Bluegreen and SIH. As expected, he said he loves me and misses me but that he still doesn't know what will happen in the future. I asked him if he was willing to do therapy and he said maybe (which probably means no). I told him I can't put my life on hold for him and that I'm not willing to give up on getting married and having a family. He was sad but he agreed that I shouldn't put my life on hold. I'm not going on the trip (luckily he can get his money back..I'm relieved about that). I didn't tell him to never call me again but he knows I'm serious about what I want and I think he'll respect that. We ended on a positive note. We do love each other very much but we just don't want the same things. I'm very glad I went, and I'm EXTREMELY glad I was mentally prepared before I did. I'm glad this didn't happen before now. I really am ok. I'm still seeing that other guy but I'm having some doubts about him. I'm not sure if I feel a spark. Moral of the story - don't break NC until you know you'll be ok no matter what. I've been on these boards for quite awhile. I've seen stories like yours 1000 times, and it always usually pretty copied and pasted advice that I and many others give. With your situation, I think you handled it incredibly maturely that many others just simply wouldnt do. For that, you have my respect. It's hard to REALLY know what you want. People might say they do, but many of them dont. Its refreshing to see someone like yourself know EXACTLY what she wants and will take nothing less. I like that. Many of times, I would say "The meeting is to feed the ego and he wants to make sure you still care. It wont end up well and really accomplish nothing. Stay NC." With this, you gave it enough time, your emotions were very clear, and it didnt hurt to do what you did (at least not as much as it would months ago) I think you handled it amazingly. I dont say that or really see that on here a lot. Keep moving forward. 2
Author KaliLove Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 Gee golly I bet you are just heartbroken over disappointing me. But that's as much as am gonna say whatever your opinion is of me is your own choice. And thank the ever good Lord I was never the kind of person that wilted as flower if someone disliked me but am still "glad for you". Anyway back to the post ... Yeah, you seem really happy for me. I was joking by the way..and I didn't dislike you until this mean spirited post.
Author KaliLove Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 I've been on these boards for quite awhile. I've seen stories like yours 1000 times, and it always usually pretty copied and pasted advice that I and many others give. With your situation, I think you handled it incredibly maturely that many others just simply wouldnt do. For that, you have my respect. It's hard to REALLY know what you want. People might say they do, but many of them dont. Its refreshing to see someone like yourself know EXACTLY what she wants and will take nothing less. I like that. Many of times, I would say "The meeting is to feed the ego and he wants to make sure you still care. It wont end up well and really accomplish nothing. Stay NC." With this, you gave it enough time, your emotions were very clear, and it didnt hurt to do what you did (at least not as much as it would months ago) I think you handled it amazingly. I dont say that or really see that on here a lot. Keep moving forward. Thanks! That means a lot. I agree..if I'd tried this before now I would just be a lady-sized puddle of tears right now.
bluegreen Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 Oh for crying out loud girl are you really trying to cause a drama here ? YOU CALLED ME pointed finger at me made sure to mention I was just about only one who had no faith in you. Read this I don't dislike You I don't agree with you and will say What I said yesterday again still that does not mean I dislike you as person. CHILL accept that people can agree to disagree move on don't make snarly remarks and call them jokes CHILL and let it go. You did what we hoped you will that's all it matters CHILL go on read few new posts pay it forward eat a candy bar. I have
guest572 Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 It sounds like you didnt hear anything new from the meeting, but if you didnt go you may have wondered and analyzed things or regretted it. Glad you are feeling ok
sooshi Posted April 1, 2014 Posted April 1, 2014 I'm so glad you're all right, Kali. I knew you would be. I'm happy that you don't settle for less than what you want. You've inspired me to do and LIVE that way too! 2
Author KaliLove Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 I'm so glad you're all right, Kali. I knew you would be. I'm happy that you don't settle for less than what you want. You've inspired me to do and LIVE that way too! Aww..well I'm glad you're feeling better. I knew you'd be ok!
Author KaliLove Posted April 1, 2014 Author Posted April 1, 2014 I got an email from his mom asking me for my address so she can send me a birthday present. She's such a sweet lady, and my mom died years ago..ahh..why can't I get custody of his mom in the break up?? Lol
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