asbms18 Posted January 30, 2005 Posted January 30, 2005 My ex left our 20 year marriage four months ago. He is shacked up with a friend of mine.She is 20 years older than him. I still have three children at home and I am just foolingmyself. I am going through the motions day after day, but when I see him, my heart still hurts. All the kids have had dreams about him coming back ( I have too). It is so hard for me to continue my life as usual. He has not kept in touch with the children either. no gifts for christmas or anything. Do you guys think that a man can get over a longterm marriage over quicker than a woman? Does he sometimes still think of us?Does he miss us? I am still in pain!
poister Posted January 30, 2005 Posted January 30, 2005 I'm certain your ex still thinks of you and misses certain parts of the relationship. Perhaps moving on quickly is his way of trying to distract himself from the pain - IMHO, a pretty lousy coping strategy, but we all know someone who's done this. It sounds like your situation is really difficult and frustrating. My heart is with you as you try to move on. Consider taking up a hobby or something that would serve, in small doses at least, as your own form of distraction, so you only think of him 23/7 instead of 24! Good luck.
alphamale Posted January 30, 2005 Posted January 30, 2005 Originally posted by asbms18 Do you guys think that a man can get over a longterm marriage over quicker than a woman? Does he sometimes still think of us?Does he miss us? No, Yes and Yes
ex Posted January 30, 2005 Posted January 30, 2005 Ouch, I really feel your pain! Originally posted by asbms18 All the kids have had dreams about him coming back ( I have too). Isn't this the absolute worst? I can have several great days in a row, then I'll wake up to a dream that we are back together. After a dream like that, I've spent the day somehow convinced that a reconcilation will eventually happen. Once I realize just how irrational I'm being, I spend some days being sad again. The dreams are very weird, as if my subsconscious is being really mean to me or something. Do you guys think that a man can get over a longterm marriage over quicker than a woman? Does he sometimes still think of us?Does he miss us? From everything I have been reading, gender in and of itself seems to have little to do with how quickly one moves on. It probably has more to do with who initiated the breakup and what each individual has going on in his/her life to help with starting over. I can't imagine that he doesn't miss you and think of you. If it hasn't happened already, I'm sure there will come a time when he remembers just how deeply he loved you all.
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