Outoflove1 Posted March 28, 2014 Posted March 28, 2014 (edited) I think my 2 year relationship is making me depressed and I feel trapped. We broke up in December, well I left her because the lies and finding out her plans to sneak behind my back got too much. The problem is she never physically done anything so she always claims I accused her of stuff she didnt do but she only didnt do it because I broke up with her as for the lies and talking to exs behind my back, I found that by snooping and she basically lies right at my face that im accusing her of stuff that isnt true when the truth is ive already seen all the messages. I feel trapped, recently I feel attacked and abused and I think my head has gone into fight or flight to escape her. She critiques me every day of my life and talking to her is hell, she picks out my every flaw and she even calls me names behind my back. She has a nasty habbit of making me feel stupid and dumb and I think she enjoys it, baths in the thought that shes the smartest person in room because she has a Uni degree or because she has the money to get what she wants. We went out 2 days ago, its the first time ive seen her in two weeks, I had gotten confused with the buses so I was running a little late to which she decided to be annoyed at me for which I can understand but she never lets anything go and therefore she brings up 2 years of small misakes ive did and she pushes everything on top of me till I feel like I cant breath, I feel like an awful person but I dont know what ive done to deserve it. I feel like shes toxic, I feel like shes filling my veins with poison, atm shes acting cold and distant. Everything is on her terms, when we see each other (which she never makes time for), if shes stressed thats my problem. Last night she actually got mad at me for calling her beautiful, who gets mad at been called beautiful? It makes no sense. I do try so hard for her, I offer to take her out, I buy her gifts, I tell her everyday I love her, I give her my respect and rarely if ever do I ever speak to her with disrespect or anger, why is that not enough? What am I doing wrong? Do I deserve to be treated the way she is treating me? I feel bullied and since seeing her Wednesday I cant think properly, my head is stuck in fight or flight. After every misunderstanding she threatens to leave, once over it used to mess with my head badly because I thought I was losing the love of my life but now I tell her to just go then if thats what she wants. I feel like a human punching bag. Am I in an abusive relationship? Edited March 28, 2014 by Outoflove1
WrinkledForehead Posted March 28, 2014 Posted March 28, 2014 Yes. Her actions and words and behavior are abusive. Please save yourself from this. Get a therapist if you need someone to help you initiate the steps to leave. No one deserves to feel suffocated or guilty or belittled, and especially not by their partner. 1
Sweetnothing Posted March 28, 2014 Posted March 28, 2014 She doesn't need to cheat on you for you to dump her. It sounds like you're waiting for her to do something big enough that you can leave her with no guilt. You shouldn't feel guilty about leaving her. She's treating you like sh*t. You deserve better. 1
soccerrprp Posted March 28, 2014 Posted March 28, 2014 You need to let her go! She IS toxic and treating you like crap. You know this and you know you deserve better.
RonaldS Posted March 28, 2014 Posted March 28, 2014 Last time I checked, there are over 6 billion people on this planet. Now, I'm no global census taker, but I would have to imagine there are at least BILLIONS of girls out there other than the one you're wasting your life on. Just saying.
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