Newtothis2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 After 5/6 weeks of no contact the moment I NEVER thought would happen did. The text from my ex: "Are we ever going to speak again?" And since then there's been hints and attention seeking dropped to me via social media. Has anyone else experienced this?
pickflicker Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 After 5/6 weeks of no contact the moment I NEVER thought would happen did. The text from my ex: "Are we ever going to speak again?" And since then there's been hints and attention seeking dropped to me via social media. Has anyone else experienced this? Don't reply, don't reply!!
ponchsox Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Yes, I just sent the same text to my ex today. Mind games.
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Author Posted March 22, 2014 I won't reply but what's the point of it?
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Author Posted March 22, 2014 Don't reply, don't reply!! Haha I haven't... What do you think the point is?!
pickflicker Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Yes, I just sent the same text to my ex today. Mind games. Seriously?
sooshi Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 That surprised me, too. The part about mind games.
Mr.Pine Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 That surprised me, too. The part about mind games. Sooshi. You have hand. Upper hand. Keep it. Ignore him. If you want him back, wait until his text message says the following: "Sooshi! Baby! Honey! Darling! Let's try again. Let's make this work. I am miserable without you!" or some similar nonsense. Until that fateful reply, if you even want one like that, is to go NC and stay NC.
sooshi Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 This thread isn't about me, Mr. Pine. I was commenting on how someone said they had sent a text to their ex and how it was mind games. It was disappointing to read.
maturityassets Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 They want to see any reaction from you! Don't reply! Been through it. It killed her that I stop talking to her. But eventually the one time I had to go pick up something at her house weeks after wards, ooo jeez you find out they've been sleeping with other people so soon or just dating. It'll make your head explode and you won't be able to control your anxiety. Just ignore this. Its a bread crumb. Dumpers don't want to feel as if they were the bad partner but also the feeling that someone is pining for them boost their confidence on the dating market.
lauri Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 You are much better to not respond. Trust us all on this...
Mr.Pine Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 This thread isn't about me, Mr. Pine. I was commenting on how someone said they had sent a text to their ex and how it was mind games. It was disappointing to read. My bad, Sooshi. Then I guess is was meant for the OP. OP...read what I wrote. Then IMPLEMENT IT!
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Author Posted March 22, 2014 Yes... I won't reply. Of course not, as it'll just start the process over again but I was just curious as to WHAT he wants? Has anyone else had this happen to them? I miss him dearly but I couldn't go back now.
KaliLove Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 He wants you to stroke his ego and tell him that he's not a bad person for dumping you (assuming he is the dumper?). He wants you to assuage his guilt. That's all. Don't give him the satisfaction.
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Author Posted March 25, 2014 Yes, I just sent the same text to my ex today. Mind games. I'm curious as to what you mean. What games were you playing? What did you want out of it?
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Author Posted March 25, 2014 Sooshi. You have hand. Upper hand. Keep it. Ignore him. If you want him back, wait until his text message says the following: "Sooshi! Baby! Honey! Darling! Let's try again. Let's make this work. I am miserable without you!" or some similar nonsense. Until that fateful reply, if you even want one like that, is to go NC and stay NC. I have been total NC. We aren't on each others social media but I've been sent stuff by friends. I've asked them to stop now. I haven't spoken with him since January 18th. *proud* 2
Trovador Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 With due respect, madam... Why are you so interested in knowing his motives (or better that we say to you that he wants you back or something like that)? You remind me of some coworker who, after breaking up with his gf and she happened to call him first, he whispered to us "that's it! yeah! the bitch just called me!" Okay, he contacted you, big deal. I hope that breadcrumb doesn't break your resolution (and I'm not talking about responding)...
Simon Phoenix Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 If he has a clear motive besides ego stroking he'll be more aggressive and forthright in his contact. There's no need to try to dissect what he's trying to communicate -- if it's important, he'll make himself more clear. 1
forgetmenot75 Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 You guys really amazed me. Why she would not reply??? Stop being nasty. The guy wants to re connect.he wants to talk. Do you all know what he has to say??? Op: listen to your instics. So many bitter people here. 1
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Author Posted March 25, 2014 You guys really amazed me. Why she would not reply??? Stop being nasty. The guy wants to re connect.he wants to talk. Do you all know what he has to say??? Op: listen to your instics. So many bitter people here. I know darling! I could taste the lemons reading that comment above. I understand some points but... Yes, bitter lemons. I didn't join this forum to negate with bitter folk, just to get things off my chest without contacting my ex. It doesn't mean I am jumping back in the past, it gives me an avenue to speak my feelings without speaking to him. Nor do I think he's begging for me back. I was simply curious as to the psychology behind it, as it fascinates me.
Trovador Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Misery loves company... But yes, I blame myself for posting in this thread, as if it wasn't one more of hundreds of similar topics: "Hey, look, he called me! I won! I am the biggest of all'em!" What posters are looking for when creating these threads? That someone tells them "follow your instincts, honey"? No need to log in for that... Good luck, dear madame...
forgetmenot75 Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Misery loves company... But yes, I blame myself for posting in this thread, as if it wasn't one more of hundreds of similar topics: "Hey, look, he called me! I won! I am the biggest of all'em!" What posters are looking for when creating these threads? That someone tells them "follow your instincts, honey"? No need to log in for that... Good luck, dear madame... I'm tired.of people who prays the no contact.rule without even realize it's not all black or white. We are humans. We make mistakes. Plus every situation is different. Stop being harsh. The guy wants to reconnect. Slowly...but he want to. Let's hear what he has to say.
Author Newtothis2014 Posted March 25, 2014 Author Posted March 25, 2014 Misery loves company... But yes, I blame myself for posting in this thread, as if it wasn't one more of hundreds of similar topics: "Hey, look, he called me! I won! I am the biggest of all'em!" What posters are looking for when creating these threads? That someone tells them "follow your instincts, honey"? No need to log in for that... Good luck, dear madame... You mean people go though similar circumstances and look for help and advice?! Wow! One would think that's where the idea or this forum would come from. Ciao
pickflicker Posted March 25, 2014 Posted March 25, 2014 I'm tired.of people who prays the no contact.rule without even realize it's not all black or white. We are humans. We make mistakes. Plus every situation is different. Stop being harsh. The guy wants to reconnect. Slowly...but he want to. Let's hear what he has to say. So the merry go round with your ex is ideal, is it? OP, unless you can be strong in the face of disappointment, you can't reply. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
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