warrenorabbits Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 I don't understand why people ignore me or stop talking to me on OKCupid. I'm a charming, attractive, intelligent man and my profile shows that. And I'm not one of those "hi your sexy, wanna chat?" chest-picture guys either. I put a lot of thought in to my messages. So do people think they're too good for me? Am I not "in their league" because I'm not a carbon copy of a Disney prince? It's quite frustrating.
Author warrenorabbits Posted March 21, 2014 Author Posted March 21, 2014 (edited) (By the way, I realize that this post makes me sound like the exact opposite of the person I just described. However, please forgive me -- I've just had to deal with a lot of romantic melodrama lately.) Edited March 21, 2014 by warrenorabbits
J21 Posted March 21, 2014 Posted March 21, 2014 (edited) Don't take no responses personally, it's just how OLD is. There could be a million reasons why, and it's not worth even finding out. ie: the person could've found someone, went away on vacation, not be interested, already seeing too many people, too many messages, etc. Just because someone messages someone, they are not "owed" a response. I don't mean this in a harsh or mean way, just the way it is. Edited March 21, 2014 by J21 2
organizedchaos Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 I don't understand why people ignore me or stop talking to me on OKCupid. I'm a charming, attractive, intelligent man and my profile shows that. And I'm not one of those "hi your sexy, wanna chat?" chest-picture guys either. I put a lot of thought in to my messages. So do people think they're too good for me? Am I not "in their league" because I'm not a carbon copy of a Disney prince? It's quite frustrating. These are all opinions of yourself, based on your own opinions, of yourself. Not necessarily the opinions of how others view your profile or messages. 2
moonlightpath Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Just keep trying!! I have been on OKC before and when a guy would send me a message I would check out his profile and if it didn't catch my attention I wouldn't reply. I'm sure it doesn't happen to you ALL the time. Don't take it personally. I'm positive it happens most guys on OKC since us girls normally don't take control and send the first message. My only advice is to be respectful when talking to a girl (I'm assuming you're straight lol) online and to keep trying.
WP4046 Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Just because someone is online doesn't mean they are available. It could be a fake profile For example, I know a girl who I was going to meet but I took too long and she met someone else. But the point is her profile is still on there and she is in a relationship. She won't delete her profile because he hasn't deleted his So you could be sending messages to someone who is not available which is why you should not take online dating seriously. And keep in mind OKC is a free site 1
Author warrenorabbits Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 I understand that no one owes me a response. As a matter of fact, I probably don't respond to 90% of the messages I'm sent for various reasons (most are guys since I'm a bi man). I feel terrible about it, though, because I know what it's like to have someone not respond; plus, those people are probably nice as friends in real life. It's just that I'm not interested in dating them, based on a very brief impression, and I'd be wasting both of our times by leading them on. I also get that not everyone has the same opinion and people can be turned on or off by whatever. I've learned to have confidence in myself and not try to please everyone. Still, when someone seems to be a match and they don't respond, I can't help but think "Umm, what exactly did this person expect from me? Perfection?"
Author warrenorabbits Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 Also, I prefer to meet women IRL but RL has, as of late, been mostly work and dismal bars. I'm in the process of fixing that.
GemmaUK Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 Still, when someone seems to be a match and they don't respond, I can't help but think "Umm, what exactly did this person expect from me? Perfection?" Maybe they are looking for some kind of attraction and for them it wasn't there? I wouldn't think a computer database is able to judge whether Miss A will find Mr B attractive physically. Same as you may be attracted by looks but when you meet there's no spark, the pheromones are all wrong..etc. I was chatting to a 'lovely guy' on OLD the other day but he was too far away for me. The chatter went on..and he wanted to come to me for a meet up. He stopped responding when I mentioned he would need to check out hotels.. I think he thought he would be able to stay at my house...er...nope! Lol!
WP4046 Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 Maybe they are looking for some kind of attraction and for them it wasn't there? I wouldn't think a computer database is able to judge whether Miss A will find Mr B attractive physically. Same as you may be attracted by looks but when you meet there's no spark, the pheromones are all wrong..etc. I was chatting to a 'lovely guy' on OLD the other day but he was too far away for me. The chatter went on..and he wanted to come to me for a meet up. He stopped responding when I mentioned he would need to check out hotels.. I think he thought he would be able to stay at my house...er...nope! Lol! I would have too because it sounds stupid for someone to travel to your part of town to see you and you are recommending they stay at a hotel ALONE When a girl came to meet me from another state she stayed at my place. Why would she stay at a hotel?
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