lamis Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Hey everyone, My fiancée who I had been engaged to for 8 months and with for 2.5 years left me on Saturday (4 days ago). Obviously I'm distraught and not doing very well, but I know it was for the best and I will move on in the end. The path to that end though is pretty daunting. However, that's not really the point here. My point is that I have noticed that in the mornings I think much more clearly and logically about what happened and about my future. I am sad when I think about her, sure, but I feel ok about it. However, it seems like once afternoon comes rolling around, I lose all semblance of logic and can't even keep myself composed. This persists more or less until I go to bed. My question is: is morning better for any one else? If so, anyone have any idea why? I'd like to capture the logical side of my grieving and keep it around all day if I can, I have a professional life to live.
Author lamis Posted March 18, 2014 Author Posted March 18, 2014 No. I mean, mornings aren't usually super difficult for me, but I don't love getting up in the morning early either. Plus, we were in (what would have been a temporary) LDR for the last few months and because of a huge time difference, I actually talked to her in the morning every day. If anything, mornings should be worse. I guess I will just enjoy how lucid I am in the mornings and use that time to be productive and write notes to myself for later in the day, and then let myself fall to pieces in the afternoon. It is working ok so far.
TaraMaiden Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 I don't know where you work or what you do, but maybe you should consider some form of meditative practice in the afternoons, to adjust your mind-frame and focus on calm, instead of now expecting the agitation....what we fear, we generate....
Author lamis Posted March 18, 2014 Author Posted March 18, 2014 Luckily I am an academic, so my schedule is pretty flexible. I think you're right, I have yet to really try meditation out, and have seen it on lots of the advice websites/books. Maybe I can find a way to extend my periods of lucidity at the very least. I think no matter what I need to have a period every day where I completely break down, but I would prefer to minimize it to 15 minutes or so.
Snow101 Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 I hate mornings more than anything else. When I'm alseep or dreaming I'm not in my head most of the time. Then I wake up and its like damn. Back to reality. And shes still gone. Still doesn't love me. 1
Author lamis Posted March 19, 2014 Author Posted March 19, 2014 Interesting take on the whole thing WolverineFan. Feeling refreshed makes sense. I was thinking maybe it was simply that my brain wasn't fully functional yet in the morning, but your reason works just as well.
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