staryeyes Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Hi everyone.. This maybe silly question but its one that bothers me a little so i am hoping someone has some input. Have been dating this guy for 2 months now. He says i am only one and that he doesnt want to do anything to risk losing me. Things seem pretty good we do spend alot of time together. But i have noticed when we are together he turns his phone volume off to vibrate when we are together. I never do as i feel i have nothing to hide. If i get a text or call when together he will ask who and i always tell him. Though his phone is always on vibrate. Is this something to worry about or am i making too much out of this?
Keenly Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 There is an chance it could be out of respect, especially if he does it right in front of you . I do it now every time because I had two girlfriends who would always start with the " who's texting you " insecurity BS.
melell Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Hi everyone.. This maybe silly question but its one that bothers me a little so i am hoping someone has some input. Have been dating this guy for 2 months now. He says i am only one and that he doesnt want to do anything to risk losing me. Things seem pretty good we do spend alot of time together. But i have noticed when we are together he turns his phone volume off to vibrate when we are together. I never do as i feel i have nothing to hide. If i get a text or call when together he will ask who and i always tell him. Though his phone is always on vibrate. Is this something to worry about or am i making too much out of this? I would say you are making far to much out of this.
Author staryeyes Posted March 18, 2014 Author Posted March 18, 2014 Yes i will definately admit i have some trust issues that is why i asked here weather i was making too much out of this. I spent 15 years in a marriage to someone who cheated for 13 of thoes 15 years, wore me down a bit and took some serious time to get my self esteem back. I really do like this guy i guess some of thoes trust issues still linger
Eivuwan Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 My first assumption was that he was doing it out of respect. 2
Phoe Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 When my boyfriend and I are together we put our phones on vibrate as a sign of respect. No interruptions from noises coming from our phones. All focus on each other rather than electronic devices 1
David87 Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 You can never know for sure, where I live if my gf puts her phone on vibrate it's a bad signs. It means that she's hiding something. But listen to my colleagues they seem to know best. There's nothing to worry about.
Gottabestrong Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 When my boyfriend and I are together we always put our phones on silent. Not because we have anything to hide, but because we want to focus only on each other and don't want interruptions. We will check from time to time if we missed an important phonecall or text, but mostly we tune out the rest of the world when we are together. I see no reason to be alarmed by this. 1
David87 Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 When my boyfriend and I are together we always put our phones on silent. Not because we have anything to hide, but because we want to focus only on each other and don't want interruptions. We will check from time to time if we missed an important phonecall or text, but mostly we tune out the rest of the world when we are together. I see no reason to be alarmed by this. What if someone calls you about your car being on fire, but you don't answer because you focus on your bf..... is this normal???. I don't think so. I just gave you an extreme case but I hope you get my point.
pickflicker Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 When my boyfriend and I are together we put our phones on vibrate as a sign of respect. No interruptions from noises coming from our phones. All focus on each other rather than electronic devices This is always my thinking. Certainly on a date, but half the time, my phone gets left on silent for days because I forget. Drives my friends crazy... 2
pickflicker Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 What if someone calls you about your car being on fire, but you don't answer because you focus on your bf..... is this normal???. I don't think so. I just gave you an extreme case but I hope you get my point. Like you said, it's an extreme example. My phone is there for my convenience. Chances are, if something critical happens, there's very little that can be done about it in a phone call. It's different if you have children. But if not, it's perfectly acceptable for you to be "unreachable" on your phone. Especially if I'm with someone special. 3
Gaeta Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Well I differ. When I was multi dating I kept my phone on silence or vibrate while on a date I was too afraid bo number 2 and 3 text or called. Now that I have 1 boyfriend my phone is not on silence and I answer in front of him because I have nothing to hide. If you go out at the restaurant or a movie yes it's normal to put our phone on silence but if you're spending time together at your home or his, no I don't think it's normal. If you were married 15 years I imagine you are in your 40s now and so is he. At our age most of us have children and that's why we rarely put our phone on silence in case of emergency.
David87 Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Well I differ. When I was multi dating I kept my phone on silence or vibrate while on a date I was too afraid bo number 2 and 3 text or called. Now that I have 1 boyfriend my phone is not on silence and I answer in front of him because I have nothing to hide. If you go out at the restaurant or a movie yes it's normal to put our phone on silence but if you're spending time together at your home or his, no I don't think it's normal. If you were married 15 years I imagine you are in your 40s now and so is he. At our age most of us have children and that's why we rarely put our phone on silence in case of emergency. I can only imagine what could have happened if my girlfriend saw my phone on silent. She allways checked my phone to see who called me, checked my fb to see who am I talking to, she had my pasword lol ) I guess, now that I think about it, that she never trusted me.
pickflicker Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 I can only imagine what could have happened if my girlfriend saw my phone on silent. She allways checked my phone to see who called me, checked my fb to see who am I talking to, she had my pasword lol ) I guess, now that I think about it, that she never trusted me. Uncool behaviour. If I did that, I'd expect to be dumped, and I'd dump someone who did the same. Bull**** behaviour. 4
David87 Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Yeah I know I should have dumped her when I had the chance, but I was in love like an idiot.
Phoe Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Yeah I know I should have dumped her when I had the chance, but I was in love like an idiot. To me, that seems like the kind of mindset or scenario where, because there already appears to be a lack of trust and a predisposition that SOMEONE must be doing something wrong since things need to be checked, that then putting the phone on silence is just another flag to catch your attention. In a situation where there's already trust and nobody goes through each other's personal things, putting phones on silence and tossing them to the other side of the room is not a red flag, but a sign of simply not wanting interruptions.
ASG Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 I put my phone on vibrate for numerous reasons. Sometimes is even goes on silent (and then I forget about it and miss calls!) For instance, if I'm texting with someone and I'm out of the house, unless the phone is in my bag, I will always put it on vibrate/silent. So, if I'm on the bus and my phone is out, my annoying txt msg tone won't annoy everyone else! I do the same on dates and even when out with friends, specially if I get my phone out and on the table. It's just a way to not distract. I have sound notifications for all sorts of things. Having it on vibrate/silent means that 90% of notifications will then be silent! Personally I don't see anything wrong with this...
ASG Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 I put my phone on vibrate for numerous reasons. Sometimes is even goes on silent (and then I forget about it and miss calls!) For instance, if I'm texting with someone and I'm out of the house, unless the phone is in my bag, I will always put it on vibrate/silent. So, if I'm on the bus and my phone is out, my annoying txt msg tone won't annoy everyone else! I do the same on dates and even when out with friends, specially if I get my phone out and on the table. It's just a way to not distract. I have sound notifications for all sorts of things. Having it on vibrate/silent means that 90% of notifications will then be silent! Personally I don't see anything wrong with this...
Chocolat Posted March 18, 2014 Posted March 18, 2014 Um, why don't you just ask him? What?! Don't be silly. If the people who posted here about other people's motives actually talked to those people instead... well, where's the fun in that? 1
Recommended Posts