vieve Posted March 17, 2014 Posted March 17, 2014 This is a bit of a vent, I just need to get it off my chest and help understanding why things happened, and how I can avoid this in the future. I have been casually dating a guy for about six months, every other weekend or so we'd get together. I'm an independent woman and I didn't want to push him away, so I let him pretty much make all the moves and always be the one to contact me for our dates. After a while for fear of him not knowing I had feelings for him I told him that I really liked him and spending time with him, but that I was no longer interested in a casual relationship, and unless it was going to start going somewhere I thought it was best we go our separate ways. He somehow convinced me that he was interested in me, and made a lot of promises for future plans and to communicate more. This was the ultimate test which he flat out failed and proved that he was all talk - no walk. However for three weeks he continued to text me to see what I was up to and that he had to be away on the weekends due to a family crisis, but that he really wanted to see me when he got back. Then nothing. He doesn't text me again. I sent him a text asking how he was doing because of his family things, and got no reply. Why are men so confusing like this? or why would he have led me on those past few weeks then completely ignored me? Part of me thinks it's because he wanted to be the one to break it off with me because he could sense that I would have otherwise, but are people really that immature? It's so maddening because I would have thought after 6 months he'd have enough respect for me to at least say something. And I am not even sure how to react if he ever contacts me again?
AntiSocal Posted March 17, 2014 Posted March 17, 2014 Couple of different scenarios here. He could have just wanted to keep you around for the sex/companionship because he was scared he couldn't find a girl as good as you. Then he found one and decided to disregard you. Or he could have just gotten cold feet about the relationship. I think this happens to most guys who have a lot of options. I know it happens to me constantly. On the one hand i do want a serious relationship, but every time i'm about to get into one i get scared about losing my freedom and i end up breaking it off. At the end of the day he just wasn't the guy for you. Don't fret over lost partners. Because if they truly loved you/wanted to be with you they wouldn't be able to just leave you like that. He wasn't the one for you. And some words of advice, don't go around having casual relationships with men and then expecting those same men to date you exclusively. If you want an exclusive boyfriend you need to show him from the jump that you aren't some easy lay. Make him work for it, make him become exclusive with you first and THEN give it up. I for one almost never consider seriously dating a girl who has casual sex.
J21 Posted March 17, 2014 Posted March 17, 2014 (edited) 6 months of him always taking the initiative? Maybe he wasn't sure if u were into him or not... sure u told him, but actions speak louder than words. Nobody wants to always be the one asking someone out. Perhaps he had felt it was him rolling the ball all the time, and the exclusive relationship will result in the same. It mighta got tiring for him because u played it too cool. Edited March 17, 2014 by J21 1
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