sooshi Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 MMI, we've loved our former partners so much. But they didn't love us like we loved them. They still don't love us like we love them. And that's okay. And I know, I KNOW it doesn't feel okay a whole lot of the time. Sometimes I'm at peace and in acceptance. Sometimes I even feel good about it. And other times, I feel so sad and fragile and wish we had a reconciliation as friends. Sometimes as fiances. But now that the center of our world is no longer in our world, we can focus on ourselves as being in the center of our world. Oh, believe me... I say this even though I still think about my ex-fiance a great deal of the time. But I want to get there. I want to get to the point that I don't think about him as much. So, I'm doing my best to focus on me, although sometimes it's hard because the situation makes me feel lethargic. I like what numbers said, about not planning your life around the hope of reconciliation. I know I've done this. I still look for "signs" that we'll end up together. But maybe this is more of a past thing, as I'd been doing it for years. Old habits die hard, as the saying goes. Let's love ourselves. I know it may seem like a curse that our former partner is gone, but I think it is truly a blessing, to the both of us. We loved and loved and loved them with all of our heart, and they gave us back our hearts. It may seem like rejection, and to them it might very well be rejection. But the truth is, we got back our heart because it's time that we love ourselves the way we've loved them. Our hearts belong to us, not them, or to anyone else. Your heart belongs to you. Cherish it, nuture it, and give it big hugs. 1
anemptycup Posted March 22, 2014 Posted March 22, 2014 Be strong and go NC - i wouldn't be surprised if he contacts you within 3 weeks - and if not - you should take it as a sign to move on. But, and i don't want to give you any false hope - i feel like when women, like my ex, decide it's over... it's more OVER than when a guy says it is... especially if this guy isn't dating - for sure go NC - he should be the one to get in touch - and my feeling is - he might. Don't contact him anymore -you're ruining any chances you have. Go NC - and use that time to try to idenfity your problems and what real actions you need to do to get better. My depression /anxiety also messed up my relationship.. and i wish i had another chance... but i didnt fix it when i had the chance... i feel you have a far more greater chance than i do - so, HEAL YOURSELF... and DON'T Contact him again - i bet he'll get in touch. He'll feel you are stringer, more attractive etc etc.. Good luck.
Author Me. Myself and I Posted March 22, 2014 Author Posted March 22, 2014 Thanks everyone. I've felt a little better today. Meaning i don't feel exhausted or sick. I know this will change. I haven't been in contact since. I still feel guilty for snapping back at him for texting me at 3 in the morning drunk. He must have seen the last of the things I'd returned and felt the need to contact me. I can't believe I told him that I didn't want a relationship with him and that I didn't care anymore. Regretting saying it a lot. I was angry, there's only so much a person can take. I don't understand why he had to text me to re-confirm AGAIN that he didn't want me and that he's done. Maybe to see my response? maybe because he was hurt by the fact is returned the last few bits (which means now he really doesn't have a reason to contact me again) and didn't expect it. I don't know. I told him he's made it clear that he doesn't want me and that I've realised I don't want a person like that in my life or future.... *slaps face I feel if I was to contact him now and say "oh I'm sorry for snapping and saying what I did. I'm regretting it badly" not only will make me look needy again but will send me crazy if I dont get a response. I wish I hadnt sent that text but I'd just had enough. Doesn't make it easier. I had a call from his dad asking how I was and a text from his mum asking the same yesterday..... I took the call but didn't reply to the text. Hopefully these will fizzle out.
Author Me. Myself and I Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 Yesterday I felt a little stronger. Today I feel like I'm back at square one. I've still had no contact. I really wish he'd reach out to me. I keep thinking he will turn up at my house, tell me he's made a mistake and didn't realise how good he had it (which he did). I feel like crap.
894hjk Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 U r very needy and u r harassing him! You r making yourself look pathetic. He's over u. Move on and stop texting him.
Author Me. Myself and I Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 Thank you for your advice, even if it was a bit harsh.... I know I've been that way. I know it's not the best way to be. I can't help how I feel. I haven't contacted him. I was just saying I wish he would me.... It's not easy.
mattyw Posted March 23, 2014 Posted March 23, 2014 Feeling your pain MMI. I think you need to try and forget about texting him. It's ok to be sad, it helps for a bit but don't contact him. Try and remember the good times and that he is a fool for throwing it all away
Author Me. Myself and I Posted March 23, 2014 Author Posted March 23, 2014 Feeling your pain MMI. I think you need to try and forget about texting him. It's ok to be sad, it helps for a bit but don't contact him. Try and remember the good times and that he is a fool for throwing it all away Thank you.... It's an emotional roller coaster at the moment.
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