Do I have a chance with an ex?

[mj89]

I broke up with my ex girlfriend almost two years ago, and for awhile we didn’t talk. She kept calling me when I moved away but I wasn’t ready. It stopped when I told her I missed her and she told me she loved this guy(she began dating him 6 months after our break up). I respected her decision, and stopped talking all together because I knew she was still kind of mad at me.I texted her in the morning a few days ago apologizing to her, and I told her how I felt. I was upfront and honest when I explained why we broke up, at the time I had a hard time opening up to people when we we’re dating, even my own family sometimes. I never cheated on her or anything bad, I wasn’t ready. When we we’re talking she told me she moved away and broke up with her boyfriend and she was single. She told me she was still mad at me about a situation but I told her I wanted to explain to her, communication was very hard mostly for me, she didn’t text me back that night.

 

 

So today she texted me at 3 and said “maybe I can call you this weekend”. I told her when the best time was to contact me and she ended up calling me a few hours later. We talked, and I opened up to her. She sounded like she forgave me and understood. We talked a bit but I asked her this summer if she wanted to hang out and she said “I’m kind of seeing someone but I’m single, but I want to keep it on the table” on whether or not to hang out.She told me she was off at 6 and is free on the weekends, so she practically told me when she was available, and it seems like shes open to talking. It felt normal for awhile, and I understood, I don’t want to be pushy. I know it sounds cliche but we really did love each other, and I am surprised she even talked to me. There was a lot of misunderstanding in our relationship.

 

 

When we we're talking she told me she broke up with her ex-bf someone she dated 6 months after our break up because she wasn't ready and he was too in love, so they mutually separated. In the text message the other day she told she moved and she was single, but I was thrown off when she talked on the phone today was "single but kind of seeing someone".

 

 

I figure she's seeing someone, but it I am not sure. She has always been up front, and I feel like she would have told me she wasn't interested in anymore. When we talked she understood and was happy that I opened up to her about our relationship, and its confusing to me. I also think she could be protecting herself from me to see if I am genuine.

 

 

I just felt like when we dated we weren't mature enough to be together at that time, and having her tell me she was single when I told her I regret leaving her says something, or am I over thinking? I tend to over think a lot. Is she really seeing somebody or has she not made up her mind?

 

 

I'm not gonna ask right away obviously but I just want to know if I have a chance, if there is a chance, or if she even has any remote interest in dating me again? We're so different and more mature, and I can't help but feel we have unfinished business. She texted me after our break up until she met her ex-bf and that was 6 months after our break up than it stopped when she met him.

 

 

But she just told me she wasn't ready with him, so I figure she is still having some sort of feelings for me, or am I wrong? We've grown up a lot and I just would love a second chance. I want to make it work this time if we decide to give it a go. How should I approach this? I just cant read her right now, just so confused. I told her I still love her, and I do. I just needed time to focus on myself, but am I too late?

 

Also when I told her I still had the letter she wrote to me when I texted her yesterday, she said "she meant everything truly", and was surprised I still had it. She told me that letter that if I changed as a person and I was different, but if I ever found myself to talk to her.

Edited March 15, 2014 by mj89

[opinionlover]

in simple it sounds to me like you have a good chance here. What you need to do, in my opinion, is be honest with her and tell her how you feel. But not in a needy way, in a confident way.. like you are 100% sure of what you want and perhaps the reasons that you are sure. If you do talk to her about it then you should explain that you would like her to consider a date with you, don't bring up the past unless its necessary. If you two get back together it should be as a new couple, in a new relationship, as two people who have learned a lot since their last relationship.

 

Before jumping in at the deep end however, i would recommend speaking with her on friendly terms, for a short while... but in doing so you should drop hints (subtly) as to how you have changed and make her realise that what you can offer her is something good. if you talk about your future or any immediate plans then you don't need to mention her in them for example, just mention things that you know she would like or might also want share with you, now or in the future. E.G if you have plans to move into a new flat, that's nicer than when you were with her, tell her about it. Be confident in yourself... just don't be needy and most of all.. don't worry about mind games. If she is the one for you (so long as your not needy/desperate) then you can be as open as a book about your feelings, she will appreciate it. Mind games like NC are dumb. (unless you want the relationship to end).