HeartBorken Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 To keep things simple. Me and my ex at the time of the breakup was doing long distant (She moved away from our place for school and i was suppose to move down with her a month later) We had a pretty ****ty breakup. Her not giving me the money she owes me. jumping into another relationship less than two weeks after the breakup and lying to be about it.. etc.... She was also abusing Weed & Alcohol. We been broken up about 7 months and about a month ago she has been contacting me about getting back together. I told her i felt she was just jumping back to me and i felt i was just a safety net. She claims that she was being stupid and doing stupid things and she is sorry about how she treated me. I told her to call me a few months from now after being single for a while and let me know how she still feels. About a week ago however shes been trying get in contact with me. I blocked her number from my phone so now she is trying to contact my friends to reach to me. Could anyone try to explain the behavior? (My cousin keeps telling me that maybe she is sorry and if i keep ignoring her one day she is going to stop and maybe i let her go away)......... I feel like i need more time to forgive however. Honestly it would probably make me happy to get back with her again but i still have a lot of lingering feelings. I'm angry at how she treated me. Leaving me for someone else. throwing away our future like it was nothing and i don't want to get back in a relationship with her knowing i still feel this way. Not to mention i don't trust her enough to even have a long distant relationship and i don't feel comfortable moving down with her again. I feel like if she is truly sorry she should be making an effort to fly to me as soon as possible and talk to me in person. I feel like there should be more attempts instead of saying ****ing sorry over the phone a thousand times..... Am i expecting to much? What would be things you would have to see to determine of an ex is improving.
HeartbrokenNewbie Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Why can't I be in your position! Lol x I think she can try harder but don't get carried away with fairytale stuff.. I've only ever seen people jump on planes on films x Give a little but not too much would be my suggestion x
Jiivy Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Why can't I be in your position! Lol x I think she can try harder but don't get carried away with fairytale stuff.. I've only ever seen people jump on planes on films x Give a little but not too much would be my suggestion x I cancelled work when my fiancée left me, jumped on a plane and flew to another country to try and reconcile with her. No, it didn't work - but I know why and what went wrong. ...just saying, it's not always just films. If you love someone, you'll do anything.
mangetout Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Priority is you! She dumped you and tossed you aside and now thinks that she can have you back with a snap of her finger. Let her beg and plead for a few months while you work on detaching yourself from her. You need to clear your head of resentment before giving her a second chance anyway. She would wait for you if she is genuiene
lolablue17 Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 I admire the way you analyze things and stick to your boundaries and principles. 1
Author HeartBorken Posted March 14, 2014 Author Posted March 14, 2014 Why can't I be in your position! Lol x I think she can try harder but don't get carried away with fairytale stuff.. I've only ever seen people jump on planes on films x Give a little but not too much would be my suggestion x I given her a place when she needed one. I helped her out with so much family drama. My Family accepted her as their very own. I cleared her debt by selling my own stuff just so she wouldn't have to suffer....... I get repaid by her leaving me a month before i was suppose to move in with her again. I got lied to. Told she could do better. Told i was the reason for making her leave........ I have done a hell of a lot for this woman only to be treated like second best/Crap........ The situation at hand is if we where to get back together again i would probably have to move down with her.... THAT WOULD BE ANOTHER BIG SACRIFICE ON MY PART......... and what did she do? Say she was ****ing sorry................. No..... I guess i answered my own question here lol. I'm not some frail person to be pushed over. I know there are better girls out there and i know i don't deserve the **** i am getting from her....... I know deep down i want her back but i also know most likely than not she hasn't changed much.... I just worry that maybe i am making a mistake sometimes i guess by ignoring her...... The nice guy in me hopes she understands that i am doing this only so i can relieve the pain she has caused me and hopefully we would have a better second chance down the road.......... but probably she thinks i am just being an ass as always =/
angel555 Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 At this stage,she should be the one sacrificing more than you. Dont rush into things. Looks like you know how to handle this.A little confusion on your part is understandable,but from what you say here,looks like you have more cons than pros if you do get back to her. The answer is clear here id say.
yorkie Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 you know what well played that man! id love my ex to come back to me but it wont happen i dont want her back though and tbh i reckon you shouldnt only for the fact she needs to proove she wants you and you only. never again she has to proove she has tried moving mountains to win you back. in my case though i want my ex back so i can tell her where to go even though i do love her. but she doesnt love me so i guess thats still anger there! but hey do whats right for you! i dont think though things will ever be the same 7 months is a long time! you will notice changes i think and tbh whether you like them or not is up to you. but good luck anyway but well played that man!
lolablue17 Posted March 15, 2014 Posted March 15, 2014 The nice guy in me hopes she understands that i am doing this only so i can relieve the pain she has caused me and hopefully we would have a better second chance down the road.......... but probably she thinks i am just being an ass as always =/ She understands everything. You can count on that. But she is a bargain type. She might raise her price down the road and do some of the thing you're expecting her to do. But you dont want a girl who bargains over relationship.
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