Ryan R. Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 I notice I'm myself with my friends but when an attractive girl starts talking to me or a bunch of them are in a group with my friends, I can barely be confident like my normal self. I either go quiet or start smiling a lot and being compliant (boring, predictable) in conversation. How do I avoid this?
AntiSocal Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Two solutions to this problem. First i'll tell you the one that has worked for me. Change your personality. If you can't be the same person around everyone it sounds like you are probably too impulsive with your speech. I used to be like that. I learned to stop being impulsive and THINK before i talked. Go over your words in your head, choose the best way get your point across, deliver the words in a confident voice. If you are doing this 24/7 (takes some practice) you'll never come across as insecure or quiet or anything like that. People tend to like you more because talking in this manner really exudes confidence. And if anything it makes you more confident in yourself over time. Never again will you have to second guess what you just said. Second solution? Realize that pretty girls are human too. Learn to be charismatic. Once you learn that? Charm a girl like you would charm any other person. Only difference between the way i treat women and the way i treat men? I undress women with my eyes and hold eye contact longer. Thats it and thats all. Other than that you can charm a girl exactly the same way you would charm a guy. Also learn to stop putting women on a pedestal. Even the most gorgeous girl in the world has her insecurities. And even the most gorgeous girl in the world has men that can't stand her/think shes gross/think shes too flawed. Shes human bro. She poops just like us. Remember that. You gotta learn to see everyone as your equal. You shouldn't feel superior or subordinate to anyone.
Emilia Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 How do I avoid this? Practice. Keep talking to girls. 1
AntiSocal Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Practice. Keep talking to girls. This too. Gotta practice to make perfection. They say it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert at something. That means if you start logging 5 hours a day now? In about 5 and a half years you'll be a pro at talking to women.
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