yippiedude Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 I know it's long! My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year. I'm 18 and she's 17. We both love each other so much. However I feel that there is no spark in our relationship due to her parents not really letting us do much. They are so overprotective. She's not allowed over my house because they think that I'll take her to my room to have sex with her. My mom is always home, along with my niece and nephew and my older brother. They won't let us go out much because They think as soon as I'll take her out, we're going to go to a spot and have sex. IF we do want to go out somewhere, one of her sisters HAS to come with us. If one of her sisters don't want tag along, then our date is off because she can't go. Last month, I just bought an 06 350z , and now, dates are out of the question because the car is only a two seater and there's no way for one of her sisters to fit in the car. They told us the reason why they're so overprotective is because they used to do those things when they were our age to sneak off and have sex. During the first 7 or maybe 8 months, I was cool with it. But now it is so annoying! If we want to watch a movie at her house, one of her sisters has to be in the same room. If one of her sisters are sleep when we want to watch the movie, then her 3 year old brother has to watch us and we really can't watch the movie because he's jumping from couch to couch and literally pulling both of our hair and punching us. Once, she drove me to my car that was quite a walk away after a football game, her dad called her and was so pissed off because "we were alone" All she did was drive me to my car.. Recently, my car was in the shop. And we both were hungry so she asked her mom if she could pick me up and go to McDonald's, her mom screamed at her for asking her that while I was on the phone with her, took her keys, AND took her phone. Only because my girlfriend "rolled her eyes away from her". Now, my girlfriend and I can hardly go anywhere. I love her, but I don't even feel a spark in our relationship because we can hardly do anything with each other. We can't even talk to her parents without them jumping to conclusions about sex. I really love her, but I am so tired of her parents doing this and I'm really getting bored. , I know it's their daughter and they're protecting her, but wow...
OhThatGirl Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Is she really 17? Jesus. This sounds like something the parent of a 14 year old girl would do, not the parents of a girl who is almost of age to go to college and live on her own. I don't know what to tell you. Maybe spend a lot of time with her parents, show them that you're a decent guy. Avoiding her parents and disagreeing with their parenting will only result in more restrictions being placed on your time together. Good luck. Maybe you can stick it out until she's old enough to make her own decisions. That's rough. She's quite sheltered (coming from a girl who was quite sheltered herself)
Author yippiedude Posted March 14, 2014 Author Posted March 14, 2014 Is she really 17? Jesus. This sounds like something the parent of a 14 year old girl would do, not the parents of a girl who is almost of age to go to college and live on her own. I don't know what to tell you. Maybe spend a lot of time with her parents, show them that you're a decent guy. Avoiding her parents and disagreeing with their parenting will only result in more restrictions being placed on your time together. Good luck. Maybe you can stick it out until she's old enough to make her own decisions. That's rough. She's quite sheltered (coming from a girl who was quite sheltered herself) I've did everything I could to show that I am! Her dad and I really bond a lot. We even fix up on cars together. Her mom on the other hand used to think that I was only with her daughter for her body. Over time she says changed her views toward me, but it still seems like she thinks that of me.
LEEVIT2F8 Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 The short answer is your ****ed they are never going to stop. What they are doing is so controlling and manipulative that it identifies a sickness. You are in what we call the no win zone my friend. If you want alone time with your girlfriend you need to wait until she is 18 and out of her parents house. Once an adult living on her own she can make her own decisions. Though I feel bad for her and her parents as they will probably either lose or severely fracture their relationship over her growing up. I wouldn't even advice negotiating with her parents and trying to talk it out. They are likely looking for any reason to get rid of you. And would see any effort on your part to push for alone time with her as an opportunity to ban her from seeing you entirely.
PegNosePete Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Well when she is 18 she is an adult and can make her own decisions. Until then she is legally a minor and will have to stick to whatever rules her parents choose to enforce. It's probably not a wise parenting move because over-protected children tend to "go wild" once they smell the first hint of freedom. But hey ho, it's their choice and not much you can do about it until she is 18, really. So really for now you have 2 choices, you can like it or lump it...
d0nnivain Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 Her 18th birthday isn't going to magically change anything if she remains financial dependent on them. Where are your parents in all of this? Can they step in, possibly have her & her parents over for dinner to convince her parents to lighten up a bit. Try asking for small concessions like being able to watch a movie in their den / family room with the door open but without the necessity of another person in the room. As the parents get more comfortable with that, ask for more freedoms. Prive they can trust you.
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