lilmiscassie92 Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 A co-worker and I started having a fling 6 months ago. He was iffy about committing on and off, but he came crying to me for another chance in January. We started fighting a lot, I was irritable, cranky as hell, I was nowhere near as passive as I used to be... and then I started getting more symptoms such as nausea etc. I felt like he wasn't putting in full effort like a boyfriend should either. He didn't want to put anything about the relationship on FB and I still felt like the mistress or something. The last fight happened when I texted him asking if I could stop by his fraternity party and he suddenly stopped replying. My friends I was with were saying he probably didn't want you there because there were other girls. So I went off on him. On top of all this, his "best friend" came to me saying he tells her all the time how the relationship isn't a big deal and how he wants to slleep around. He's going to havasu for spring break next week too. We got into this fight and broke up, and then all the while I test +, ended up being a chemical pregnancy/miscarriage and he was being so heartless about the situation yesterday when i finally talked to him after a week of no communication. He said he didn't want a relationship and just wanted to be single and had to do it for "him". I feel bad because I know we had been arguing because I was snappy and not as patient as I usually am, but my friends said I had reason to. I'm completely hurt though that I have to deal with all of this.
d0nnivain Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 This guy was using you for sex & had no intention whatsoever of committing to you, ever. You get that, right? It still hurts to be "dumped" &/or to figure out that you liked him way more than he liked you. All in all he treated you very badly. It doesn't feel like it but it's a good thing he's gone. He should have been more upfront about what he wanted -- NSA -- so you could have made an informed decision instead of stringing you along. The way he treated you during the pregnancy scare was just awful, bordered on mean. Hugs to you & good riddance to him. 1
saltyfishhead666 Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 A co-worker and I started having a fling 6 months ago. He was iffy about committing on and off, but he came crying to me for another chance in January. We started fighting a lot, I was irritable, cranky as hell, I was nowhere near as passive as I used to be... and then I started getting more symptoms such as nausea etc. I felt like he wasn't putting in full effort like a boyfriend should either. He didn't want to put anything about the relationship on FB and I still felt like the mistress or something. The last fight happened when I texted him asking if I could stop by his fraternity party and he suddenly stopped replying. My friends I was with were saying he probably didn't want you there because there were other girls. So I went off on him. On top of all this, his "best friend" came to me saying he tells her all the time how the relationship isn't a big deal and how he wants to slleep around. He's going to havasu for spring break next week too. We got into this fight and broke up, and then all the while I test +, ended up being a chemical pregnancy/miscarriage and he was being so heartless about the situation yesterday when i finally talked to him after a week of no communication. He said he didn't want a relationship and just wanted to be single and had to do it for "him". I feel bad because I know we had been arguing because I was snappy and not as patient as I usually am, but my friends said I had reason to. I'm completely hurt though that I have to deal with all of this. Why does it look like you are blaming yourself? The guy is a complete and utter knob!! He treated you badly, left you in an emotionally fragile state to go and party and hook up with other people and you blame you? DO NOT DO THAT EVER!!!!!!! This isn't your fault. The only fault you have is being blinded by a liar. Most of us have at some point. Find someone who is good to you, who treats you the way you should be treated. 2
Snow101 Posted March 13, 2014 Posted March 13, 2014 Lesson number 93453: Do not fall for a frat boy. And yeah, not all fratboys are dbags but he has all the hallmarks of a frat boy player. He's using all the lines, wants to sleep around, wants to be single and free, etc. Cmon, he is barely making an attempt to hide what he is. That said, ouch, he is treating you like crap and showing that he is no man at all. This one is pretty cut and dried- cut him off, and never talk to him again.
Author lilmiscassie92 Posted March 14, 2014 Author Posted March 14, 2014 Thank you everyone for the replies. I just don't know how to handle this situation. I have to see him every week until the rest of this semester. It's difficult hearing him go on about his partying plans and what not. I don't know how to fix my mentality to not care at all. It's so much easier said than done.
Conners Posted March 14, 2014 Posted March 14, 2014 You did nothing wrong, he's just an a-hole. Move on and find the guy you deserve.
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