warrenorabbits Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 I'm taking a class at work and this charming, cute, funny guy is teaching it (I'm also a guy). Luckily for me, he's pretty obviously gay. Our workplace, which has thousands of employees, does not forbid (or even discourage) workplace relationships and he works in a completely different department. I'm not ready to be in a relationship but I'd like to at least get to know this guy and I won't have the chance to work with him every day. I have a group of people that I hang out with and we're pretty open with whom we invite to events -- would it be weird to CC him on the e-mail and say "Hey, loved the class; thought you might want to join us" or something like that? Or is there a better way?
newmoon Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 I'm taking a class at work and this charming, cute, funny guy is teaching it (I'm also a guy). Luckily for me, he's pretty obviously gay. Our workplace, which has thousands of employees, does not forbid (or even discourage) workplace relationships and he works in a completely different department. I'm not ready to be in a relationship but I'd like to at least get to know this guy and I won't have the chance to work with him every day. I have a group of people that I hang out with and we're pretty open with whom we invite to events -- would it be weird to CC him on the e-mail and say "Hey, loved the class; thought you might want to join us" or something like that? Or is there a better way? that sounds like a great way to approach. it's no pressure to the other person to say yes. if they decline you can offer one more time (one refusal could be very legit), but after that it would be disinterest. just make sure when you CC him he sees the other names getting the message and it's not too personalized to him, that could be too 'familiar'
d0nnivain Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 I agree that your approach seems good. It's shows you are interested but not overly so & it gives everybody an out with dignity & no hard feelings.
ja123 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Don't cc him. Introduce yourself after the class. (polish that handshake!) Ask him/or express interest about one of the points he addressed during the class. Ask for his card, then invite him to informally join you and your group sometime. Then you can email him directly. No point in pouring it on, if you're not looking for a relationship. But worth making a contact for professional reasons or perhaps romantic reasons down the road when you're ready. Good luck! 1
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 ^agree with this in-person approach as well.
Author warrenorabbits Posted March 12, 2014 Author Posted March 12, 2014 Ah, unfortunately I didn't read in time and already carried out the CC plan. But fear not! I may have another chance. Turns out he's engaged this weekend and thus unable to come to the restaurant. But he seemed to recognize who I was at the very least. My rule of thumb is that I ask two times and then drop it ... so, since we're in different departments and thus won't see a lot of one another organically ... ?
Author warrenorabbits Posted March 12, 2014 Author Posted March 12, 2014 Addendum: The response was more "I'm so sorry! I have XYZ that day. Maybe next time" than "Sorry, I'm out of town."
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