TylerDurdenn Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 I know hitting on girls at the gym is a big no no but I need to get to know her! This girl is quite frankly the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. We have catch each other's eye every day, I'm just too shy and scared of failure to approach her! Tonight she moved directly opposite me (went from shoulder press to leg press?!?!), I tried my hardest to not acknowledge her but I could feel her staring at me, then once she finished her sets trained lats directly behind me, I moved over to the free weights then she followed and trained abs right next to me.. I know this may sound petty but it is quite obvious when someone is intentionally trying to be 'near' you.. Is she trying to get me to talk to her? If she is what do I say? If she isn't interested what's her game? She doesn't look like the type of girl that thrives on attention, as she wears no make up or makes any effort with her appearance when she goes to the gym, she's just naturally beautiful Sorry if this is a bit of a mess but I haven't been attracted to another female like this since my ex!! All advice welcome
jba10582 Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 not really giving you advice to "approach". I happen to communicate with people at the gym, males/females whoever is there. Sometimes you actually have a routine or something you do or are working towards goal wise, and this can include supersets or some people are screaming hiit...whatever you do...well if you are always moving around, in my case to keep heart rate up somewhat unless I am bsing, then sometimes people jump on what your were using and in order to actually accomplish what you came there to do you have to communicate with this person. I feel like treating a person as a person is the best way (not as a object) and most people in general, males and females will respond positively. i.e. "hey I was switching back and forth between these two, do you mind if I jump in with you so I can continue" almost no one is going to get mad at you for that because you were legitimately doing what you were doing. This is not an approach, but a way to bul*sh*t with people as a consequence of what you are already doing. 1
Author TylerDurdenn Posted March 11, 2014 Author Posted March 11, 2014 not really giving you advice to "approach". I happen to communicate with people at the gym, males/females whoever is there. Sometimes you actually have a routine or something you do or are working towards goal wise, and this can include supersets or some people are screaming hiit...whatever you do...well if you are always moving around, in my case to keep heart rate up somewhat unless I am bsing, then sometimes people jump on what your were using and in order to actually accomplish what you came there to do you have to communicate with this person. I feel like treating a person as a person is the best way (not as a object) and most people in general, males and females will respond positively. i.e. "hey I was switching back and forth between these two, do you mind if I jump in with you so I can continue" almost no one is going to get mad at you for that because you were legitimately doing what you were doing. This is not an approach, but a way to bul*sh*t with people as a consequence of what you are already doing. I was thinking something along those lines "Hey, do you mind if I train abs with you?". What's the worst that can happen? Thanks
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Ab area is the best place to ask her about working out together. Show her a cool ab thing you do. Or ask her if she knows a certain exercise to target the lower abs, etc... You could playfully say "I challenge you to a planking contest! Let's see who can hold it the longest!" But in a playful way. Then the whole time just banter back and forth. Possibilities are endless for gym talk really
Author TylerDurdenn Posted March 11, 2014 Author Posted March 11, 2014 I'll see how she acts tomorrow, if she continues to act like she did today I'll show her a proper ab workout, if she doesn't then oh well.
waiting4u Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 What you DON'T want to do is corner her while she's on a machine. Keep it light - maybe some eye contact and a smile- make sure she sees you checking her out (her face, not her a**). If she smiles at you, then you've got your green light.
Author TylerDurdenn Posted March 12, 2014 Author Posted March 12, 2014 What you DON'T want to do is corner her while she's on a machine. Keep it light - maybe some eye contact and a smile- make sure she sees you checking her out (her face, not her a**). If she smiles at you, then you've got your green light. So if a guy smiled at you and you smiled back what would you expect next?
EasyHeart Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 If you're seeing her on a regular basis, then you've got it pretty easy. Just start by smiling at her the first time you see her each time at the gym. It's just a friendly acknowledgement of someone you see a lot but don't know. After a few times of doing that, progress to saying "Hi" when you see her. You've now established yourself as someone nonthreatening and noncreepy because you aren't hitting on her. Then it's pretty easy to progress to small talk. If she's really interested in you, she may even intitiate the conversation. If you initiate, do NOT talk about your workout or offer to help. Talk about anything besides exercise. Just talk to her like you would anyone else. Good luck!
Author TylerDurdenn Posted March 12, 2014 Author Posted March 12, 2014 If you're seeing her on a regular basis, then you've got it pretty easy. Just start by smiling at her the first time you see her each time at the gym. It's just a friendly acknowledgement of someone you see a lot but don't know. After a few times of doing that, progress to saying "Hi" when you see her. You've now established yourself as someone nonthreatening and noncreepy because you aren't hitting on her. Then it's pretty easy to progress to small talk. If she's really interested in you, she may even intitiate the conversation. If you initiate, do NOT talk about your workout or offer to help. Talk about anything besides exercise. Just talk to her like you would anyone else. Good luck! Thank you! I do wonder how old she is as she is very petite but her face looks mid 20's?!? Not long til gym
David87 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 I'm so curious what will happen today, will you just smile or maybe you'll say ''hi''
Allumere Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Why do people make this so hard? Open up mouth, say hello...say anything. This is like listening to someone who is endlessly pondering what's in the box....OPEN THE DANG BOX. Stop putting so much bloody pressure on yourself or the situation....there is no timeline, the world will not end, lack of response won't stop the earth from spinning.
David87 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Why do people make this so hard? Open up mouth, say hello...say anything. This is like listening to someone who is endlessly pondering what's in the box....OPEN THE DANG BOX. Stop putting so much bloody pressure on yourself or the situation....there is no timeline, the world will not end, lack of response won't stop the earth from spinning. Because he likes her to much and because he fears of rejection. Don't we all sometimes?
RonaldS Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Here's the 'meeting girl at the gym' loophole that so many people are oblivious to: classes. Any gym that's worth a crap will have tons of classes. Spin classes, yoga classes, cardio classes, whatever. These classes are always full of women. If you're a reasonably attractive guy and you're in decent shape, you will meet every girl in those classes if you want to. You're both doing the same thing, seemingly have the same objectives, going through the same struggles, but most importantly, you're starting and finishing at the same time. That allows for idle chit-chat. Before the workout, people are getting loose and always a little chatty. Afterward, everybody is done and packing up/walking out together. Guys, it's shooting fish in a barrel. I don't do it, because I don't crap where I eat. But for a little while, I was taking some classes at a different gym, and within 2 weeks, I knew every girl there. If you try to barge in on somebody's workout, I don't know....it's awkward. I watch people do it all the time and it rarely works. However, taking classes is a whole different animal. OP, I guarantee if this hot girl is working out a lot, she's also doing classes. There ya go...that's your in.
jba10582 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Any gym that's worth a crap will have tons of classes. I have to go to an anytime fitness in my small town, and they have NO classes! Thought that was funny you said that because a lot of nicer gyms do have classes and taking yoga would be nice for a multitude of reasons.
Imajerk17 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 "Hey I see you in here all the time....." Its just starting a conversation with another human being. Keep it simple.
LifeGoesOnMan Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 You already lost. You'll be better off not approaching her. Until you rapidly depedestalize her in your mind and normalize her, you'll only come across either too creepy or needy. The way you'll talk to her and the way you'll talk to any other girl won't be the same. Approach her just like you would any other girl. Chat her up a bit, close out with her phone number, text her a few days later, little chit chat then close out with a date. Stop overthinking it and pedestalizing her. Also have a mindset of outcome independence. She might say yes, she might say no. Either way, you don't care. nail meets head. all about confidence you're the prize, not her.
Allumere Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 Because he likes her to much and because he fears of rejection. Don't we all sometimes? He can't "like" her...he doesn't even know her. At this point she is nothing more than a beautiful object he would like to know more about. And that is fine, looks is something that is typically a first attraction. With that said, and using my previous example, the box is pretty but he won't know anything else about it til he opens it.
Author TylerDurdenn Posted March 12, 2014 Author Posted March 12, 2014 So she was there, and acted exactly how she did yesterday. I just haven't got the balls to go up to her This is going to make me sound like a complete dick but I am too used to girls approaching me, I have never asked a girl out they have always asked me. Argh I'm kicking myself now.. If I don't do it tomorrow then I'll never do it! I do feel some kind of connection with her though.. Hmm.....
jba10582 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 damn bro, you posted this yesterday...you know her schedule or something?.. or "just happen" to see her there at the same time?
LEEVIT2F8 Posted March 12, 2014 Posted March 12, 2014 I would just say hello to her next time at the gym. When she says hello back I would say, "Sorry I'm so rude sometimes my name is ____". She will come back with her name. Then repeat her name and say, "_____ its very nice to meet you.". Just smile and relax like you would greet anyone. Depending on how you read the situation start a conversation, work out together, smile and flirt from across the room. It all depends... If you already got the vibe she likes you then get in there. If shes cold on the introduction you know you read the signals wrong from the get go. But at least you don't look like a creepy douche hitting on her.
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