TheNewMe2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 I thought I was past the need to get constant feedback about my situation - and actually, things are going very well. She and I recently went out with four other couples and at one point got a question about 'what is going on with us?". To which I stumbled and didn't want to presume anything - she gave the perfect answer, "we are dating". And we are - and I can't stop thinking about her and we are having a very light good time. The other night she was on a business trip and gave me call and we talked for nearly two hours. And maybe that is part of my concern. I *still* despite the fact we've been 'dating' for a month and got to know each other before that - get nervous that I'm not going to have anything to converse with her about when we get together. Mind you, when we do get together - we spend 8-10 hours together, we occasionally chat for an hour or two on the phone as well as text. We are definitely at the start of something, I think, could be special. We are planning to take a weekend trip together next month and discussions of future trips we'd like to take. But she's very receptive to talking and answering questions - but she's not big on initiating/asking many questions herself. As for me, I'm really not a huge conversationalist. With her, I want to be - though. I feel like silence is deadly - even for two or three minutes. So, sometimes, to fill the gap, I just create something to talk about. A lot of this is that I know so much more about her. Again, we have no problem having a good time...a great time. The other night we met out at happy hour and ended up staying out all night. but this concerns me. I am wondering if I over think about it. I know even with friends, I'm sometimes concerned that I don't have enough to say. Almost if I'm always auditioning for a friendships/relationships. My advice to myself is be secure in who you are and you've already gotten her interested...just be you. But silence scares me because I feel like it means we have nothing interesting to say or don't have anything in common. Tell me, like everything else, I'm over thinking it. Or maybe I'm not. And for whatever it matters....we have kissed, hold hands, etc - but haven't started a physical relationship. And that's perfectly fine...I'm committed to taking this with her very slowly and at her pace. She's too worth it.
Hello_is_it_me Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 You are over thinking and also - do you share common interests? So that last 2 hour convo.. what did you both talk about that whole time?
d0nnivain Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 I really hope you only exhibit this level of insecurity here on LS & not to her. Stop borrowing trouble. It's all good. How did the flowers go over? Learn to like the silences.
J21 Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Congrats on the new budding relationship! Can u stop worrying and just enjoy dating her?? You seem to be so afraid of "messing up", even though things are going great. like seriously just chill the eff out and relax. Conversation and such will come naturally. And even if they dont get used to being comfortable in each others silence. U guys dont have to be yapping every second u guys r together!
Author TheNewMe2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Author Posted March 11, 2014 oh - we do share common interests. As for convo - talked about her trip, our planned trip, work, gossip, etc.... Yes - my insecurity is only here Actually have been very secure and it's I'm not sure it's an insecurity as much as understanding silence is ok. I think that's the point. I know things are going well. Flowers went over well. 1
Assasda Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Your whole question lets you seem very weak OP. very very weak. Do you feel you need to entertain her, like some monkey, or you will lose her. If thats what you fear. thats what you will attract. So I dont understand the whole statement about silence. Try improving yourself by reading a book or doing something different if you are really insecure. Work out or something like that
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