Daemones Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Hey there, I'll just jump right into this. I'm a College Freshmen, and in one of my classes is this really good-looking, cute girl. At first my friend I now sit next to spotted her on the first day of classes and sat next to her. Safely to say, she moved to the table in front of her by the next class. I didn't really pay much attention to it, but then I started noticing her myself, and I began to develop a crush. My friend is kind of a loser at times, and I have this habit of appearing in class as the "alpha male", making a few jokes and acting a little egotistical in a way whenever I have this eye on a girl and I know she's right there. And I know she hears it, and I think she kind of likes it. I'm more open, let's put it that way (if that makes any sense). After an incredibly hard test, this girl and I finished at the same time, passed ours in, and left. I remarked how the test sucked and we introduced ourselves to one another. Now I make the attempt to always walk out together after class (we both always park in the campus garage). I joke-flirt around with her, laugh during class and all that. She appears a little shy, but she's very open at the same time. I think I'm ready for the next move, but I'm unsure how to approach it. I did a little searching and came across Kezia Noble's and was thinking of following her guideline. (Basically, go up to her somehow and say in a soft calming voice, "You have incredible legs", and if it goes bad say, "I'm a huge flirt, didn't you know that?". I'm however not sure if that's the best move. Another option I considered was just straight up asking for her number, which I've done in the past with other girls and its worked out, but then I get to the part where I wouldn't know where to go from there. Do you ask her out somewhere, invite her over, etc? Could that all be leading more towards being friend-zoned? (Which I'm not a foreigner of believe me...) So any advice, helpful tips and comments would greatly be appreciated. Thanks in advance!
ExpatInItaly Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 Hey there, I'll just jump right into this. I'm a College Freshmen, and in one of my classes is this really good-looking, cute girl. At first my friend I now sit next to spotted her on the first day of classes and sat next to her. Safely to say, she moved to the table in front of her by the next class. I didn't really pay much attention to it, but then I started noticing her myself, and I began to develop a crush. My friend is kind of a loser at times, and I have this habit of appearing in class as the "alpha male", making a few jokes and acting a little egotistical in a way whenever I have this eye on a girl and I know she's right there. And I know she hears it, and I think she kind of likes it. I'm more open, let's put it that way (if that makes any sense). After an incredibly hard test, this girl and I finished at the same time, passed ours in, and left. I remarked how the test sucked and we introduced ourselves to one another. Now I make the attempt to always walk out together after class (we both always park in the campus garage). I joke-flirt around with her, laugh during class and all that. She appears a little shy, but she's very open at the same time. I think I'm ready for the next move, but I'm unsure how to approach it. I did a little searching and came across Kezia Noble's and was thinking of following her guideline. (Basically, go up to her somehow and say in a soft calming voice, "You have incredible legs", and if it goes bad say, "I'm a huge flirt, didn't you know that?". I'm however not sure if that's the best move. Another option I considered was just straight up asking for her number, which I've done in the past with other girls and its worked out, but then I get to the part where I wouldn't know where to go from there. Do you ask her out somewhere, invite her over, etc? Could that all be leading more towards being friend-zoned? (Which I'm not a foreigner of believe me...) So any advice, helpful tips and comments would greatly be appreciated. Thanks in advance! Don't do that. I'd find that incredibly sleezy and a bit creepy if some guy said that to me. It's not the impression you want to make. Ask her to meet you for coffee at XYZ cafe on XYZ date. That is a much safer approach and you'll know right away if she's interested, without coming across as a wannabe Lothario. 2
Author Daemones Posted March 9, 2014 Author Posted March 9, 2014 Exactly Alex. Its not the getting the number part that's difficult for me to ask, its just once the texting happens I'm not sure a good method is of handling it. Maybe I'm just overthinking it, I don't know. And thanks for the advice, ExpatInItaly. It does sound a bit strange and creepy doesn't it? At the time I thought that was the best idea since it'd be upfront. But maybe you can be too upfront and end up looking creepy in the process. How should I go about asking it? Just be like, "Hey we should get coffee after class Wednesday at xyz cafe" or should I arrange the date on a different day? We have the same class together on Mondays and Wednesdays. Maybe the different day would work better?
Barbarossa Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 I would get to know her better before asking her out. Find out if she has a boyfriend then proceed to asking her out. I wouldn't worry about the day you ask her out maybe right after class on campus? I have gotten coffee with several girls after class on campus. 1
Copelandsanity Posted March 9, 2014 Posted March 9, 2014 "You have incredible legs." You should use this line just for the experience and report back to us I don't think this advice is targeted towards college freshmen
Author Daemones Posted March 10, 2014 Author Posted March 10, 2014 (edited) "You have incredible legs." You should use this line just for the experience and report back to us I don't think this advice is targeted towards college freshmen Not too shabby eh? But I think you're right. It's probably targeted more towards men at the bar or something. True Barbarossa, getting to know her better is the priority. Maybe getting coffee would help though. We'd both get to know each other better and at the same time it's a step in the right direction. I'll see if she's free Wednesday after our class. I have a rather annoying pimple right below my nose that needs to go away... Edited March 10, 2014 by Daemones
bubbaganoosh Posted March 10, 2014 Posted March 10, 2014 Look. Just ask her if she would like to meet for lunch. She's either going to say yes or no. You said she's a bit shy so if your waiting for her to make the first move, then your in for a long wait. Give it a shot friend, you might be surprise, have a nice time and find yourself a nice girl.
Author Daemones Posted March 11, 2014 Author Posted March 11, 2014 Just to give everyone an update, I went through with it. I think it went really well... Until she told me she has a boyfriend. Ah well, can't win them all right? What was that Barbarossa? Finding out if she has a boyfriend before? Haha maybe you're right. As creepy as this sounds, I went through Facebook, Twitter and even Instagram, and apparently, she doesn't have any of them. Otherwise I would have been able to spot it. She seemed a little shocked at the question, and then she kind of mumbled she has a boyfriend. I played it off cool, and she obviously knew at that point I had a crush on her. So she said "we can still be friends" and that we can still get coffee. So I said alright, and we said bye as usual. So come Wednesday I'll say that her and I should still go because we'll both have a good time and have fun, F it, etc. So hey if in the near future things with her boyfriend go south, I'll still be in the picture. Thoughts? And to think I wanted to go with the "nice legs" pick up line... imagine how that would have turned out
Assasda Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 First off man, good job on just asking her. You should have posted what you said. Another thing is that. When you ask girls these things, you have to come from a confident place. A place where you say "Hey, I am an awesome dude, this chick should love to get to know me. It should be her pleasure" Act like youre doing the girl a favor. Dont act as if she's doing you some favor by going out with you. Anyway, I would advise you to still go to coffee with this girl, if she wants it, dont pressure it, or even think about. Dont even question it. & Go out with other girls
Michael91 Posted March 11, 2014 Posted March 11, 2014 Just to give everyone an update, I went through with it. I think it went really well... Until she told me she has a boyfriend. You did very well. Now you should treat her as a casual friend and say "Hi" but not attempt to have coffee or lunch with her unless, by chance, as part of a group. Now she knows you like her and she will have time to think and consider whether or not she wants more. In that case, she will find a way to let you know. I would take her having a boyfriend with a grain of salt. You should realize that freshmen girls get a lot of attention from upperclassmen which they usually prefer. Regardless, if your college is typical, there are three girls to every two guys. Therefore, unless she is exceptionally attractive compared to yourself, the odds favor you and that after some time passes she will approach you in some manner such as asking help for some homework problem or suggesting meeting for coffee.
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